I am a nameless creature so fluid,
Never the same from day to day.
I pinned myself down too soon,
On a whim I named myself.
It was the wrong time for it,
I was not ready and didn't think.
Now I am 17,
No longer the scared 13 year old I was.
The name I chose was wrong.
My parents detested it too much,
And it just wasn't mine.
I know no name shall feel like mine,
Not more than a few months,
But that's okay with me.
I will pin myself down again,
My name is now Max.
It may stick,
It may not.

He wants to be your boy
Soft and innocent
And rough, but coy
Though, he knows he'll never be intimate

You want to be a boy
A defined jaw
Ecstatic and full of joy
The most handsome boy you ever saw

I am a boy
I ruffle my hair when I talk
Standing confident in corduroy
But the definition is lost in the fog

I have never heard a love song
That reminded me of you.
No words can describe your love,
Your eyes, your smile, your laugh.

They write these love songs,
Ones that never describe us well.
Always a man and a woman,
Usually nothing that we feel.

I want to write a love song,
One about only us.
To paint what we have,
A picture beyond human imagination.

I can't write a love song
That does you justice.
You are far too beautiful for words,
And too breath-taking for music.

A love song for you would be impossible,
You are too lovely for words.
Even in poems I am stuck,
Rambling about you, but never enough.

She smells like roses and fresh cut grass,
Her lips taste like cherry and peach.
Fireflies on a summer night,
Toasting mellows on the beach.
I grieve the life I’ll never have,
The bride I’ll never meet,
Waltzing down the aisle,
Linen flowing to her feet.
Eyes shining sapphire and gold,
Piercing my cold shroud of a soul,
Bringing fire to this heart of coal.
My cage is built of my own bigotry.
More than a promise, the binding of souls.
Caught in a web, lost all control,
She is daisies, she is sunshine, she’s tanlines and sand.
I could’ve sworn I saw her standing there,
But I’ll never hold her hand,
The girl I see in my dreams.
She.

I‘m sorry my light painted you in colors you didn‘t know you had in yourself
I‘m sorry I opened you up for new scents you never knew you could smell
I‘m sorry life was easier before you held my hand
But why did you have to curse me?
it wasn’t me who sent you to hell

i need to drown in your scent
to be engulfed in your presence
to melt in your arms
and become one with you

Every day on this train station,
I stand and wait for confirmation.
She's standing on the other side,
and lets her hair out in a glide.

Shadows spilling on the platform,
wind is blowing in my face.
Number 23 incoming,
she is getting on the train.

And as I stand on this train station,
she turns around in confirmation.
The train doors close, I wave goodbye.
We'll see each other in no time.

The air feels nice, the station – empty,
next train is scheduled, one of many.
A windy summer afternoon,
it's cool, it's quiet, it goes too soon.

i wish youd let me go
so id stop hurting you

i wish youd let me go
so you dont have to see me in pain

i wish youd let me go
so you could get better

i wish youd let me go
so i stop hurting us

i wish you stay
so we get better together

shes beautiful
shes hurting
i wish i could tell her what i thought

it hurts
to see her in so much pain
but for her not to come to me

but

i guess

im a hypocrite

guilty of the same sins
and it pains me

to be

to be putting her through
this much pain

just because

im selfish
and cant let go
but cant hold on

just there
not living
not dying

looking
out of my eyes
through frosted glass