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Laura May 2018
It was a bad night last night
My tear stained cheeks
and sliced up wrists
can vouch.
I never know what I'm thinking anymore...
Or why.
I just know that I am.

It's scary,
You know...
Being like this.
I get scared,
and other people get scared.
More often than not,
I can't control these thoughts...
These protruding and unwelcome thoughts
but I don't know what to do.
I never know what to do anymore.
I just know that I've had a lot of bad nights lately.
A lot of them.
But I don't know what to do.
Laura May 2018
It's all cranberry juice and pills
Zoloft pills
Little tiny tic tac Zoloft pills.
Insurance pays for most of it,
But there are a couple crinkled dollars in my pocket that pick up the rest.
They're supposed to help.
I should be able to get out of bed,
And do daily ****.
But all I do is grab more Zoloft,
And take my daily ****.
The cranberry juice helps the **** not burn,
But the cream doesn't do anything for the hemorrhoids
That come from trying so hard to **** out the food I never eat.
It all just hurts nowadays,
So I have to take pills.
Pills on top of pills
And pills after those pills.
It all just hurts from laying in bed all day.
But I never get up.
Just to get more tiny tic tac pills,
And to take my daily ****.
Most days I forget,
But sometimes I take 6.
Twice the prescribed won't **** me.
I'll **** myself before any little pill does.
Clare Henderson May 2018
Constantly hidden by an altered mind.

Medicated to numb this monster I try so hard to hide.

Isolate myself before you have a chance to see

who I really am on the inside.
Dresden May 2018
I spend all day begging for my head to come in contact with a pillow
But when the clock finally permits this
I lie awake

For hours on end my mind is filled with noise and my heart feels hollow
Why do I still suffer like this
For goodness sake

I'm unable to feel sadness thanks to the medications I swallow
And the happiness I get from a kiss
Feels entirely fake

I know this is better than suffocating in the deepest shadow
That extended from my past
But still I ache
anya May 2018
you will try to paint it out,
or write it down,
sing,
dance,
and act it out,
but no one will see the picture.

i'm sorry.
one day, i'm sure, we shall search for those who will.
Maes May 2018
The doctor says I’m ill
Unable to function so they give me a pill
Still unable to get rid of this condition
But trying to fix me seems to be their mission

My muscles are weak
Poisoned by those drugs, I can hardly speak
Is this cure supposed to be this bad?
Because if this is I’d rather be mad
This is about my current frustration with the medication I take at the moment for my bipolar disorder.
Shanne Apr 2018
It’s 5:22 and I still haven’t slept.

It’s not uncommon anymore and they say insomnia is a side effect of Paroxetin.

I call *******.

Tomorrow I’ll be picking up a new prescription - things they feed me to make themselves feel better.

St John’s Wort.

They say its safer and more traditional, less side effects.

I’m just exhausted.

I think they’re just trying to get me talking again. I’ve stopped coming to the sessions and is it normal that I’ve felt better since?

Probably because they’ve upped the dosage of my Paxil.

Do they know that Paroxetine can overdose? 560 mg I heard can ****. That’s 28 tablets.

I counted 13 in my bottle. That’s just about enough to get someone to hallucinate and *****.

Useless.




I hear chirping outside my window.

It gets me smiling.
T R H Apr 2018
I've talked to the doctors
I'm taking the pills
Medication, meditation
but it all seems to fail

I'm shackled down
by the weight of my misery
and what other steps
can I take to be free
except to find
the tallest building

and leap.
Patricia LeDuc Mar 2018
It’s my night to meet with Liz
To tell her “bout my private biz
She mulls it over then tells me how it really is
You see it’s her job
To listen to me cry and sob
Imagine that…
She gets paid to listen to me

Most therapists say:

“Having a little anxiety attack?
"How about some nice Prozac”
Or
Can’t sleep, feeling lost and alone?
“How about some nice Trazodone”
Or
“Manic Depressive? Feel like a ***?
How about some nice Lithium”

Not Liz…
She gives appropriate drugs
Better yet she gives big hugs
Encourages me my thoughts to share
Teaches me to live again if I dare
To break free from loss and pain
Knowing from the truth I might gain

More free time
For both of us

On
Wednesdays at six
Dedicated to Liz
My therapist for over 15 years.  
She passed January 9th 2018
Original 12/10/04
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