In the morning, alarm clocks ring,
Covers rustle, small birds sing;
But when I wake, I've slept too long-
And wake to find you already gone.
I pat the pillows sadly, wishing you were here,
Then arise more steadily with mounting fervent cheer;
For tonight you shall return to me-
Tonight, you will be near;
And I await your presence
My love, my precious dear.

I pray that you can feel my love.
Everyday in my head,
I pray for you & I
to remain cuddling in bed.
Under our favourite sheets,
your body tailor-made to fit mine.
My fingertips tracing your skin,
both bodies intertwined together.
This is my dream.


So please do not wake me,
Unless answering my prayer✨

The clouds around me gather
as I collect my thoughts about what I think is real or not.
The fear takes over in the blue sky of my mind
and my heart sinks deeply into the abyss of my chest
and I wonder how many lives have you had before we met
and how many lives will you have after me.
The ocean of my heart is deep and waning
and I have no way to navigate it without
the ideas of what I think I know already
and it is of no help because
without the smell of you I have no way to remember
if you were real.
Sometimes I sit here confused
and strained
and all I want is to have a cigarette like someone who has a real thought would need to compose their real thoughts
and look smart about it but but but but..
disappointment surges in again
and again like a cruel joke
and it makes me wonder if the decisions I make about my life
and the choices I choose are really the ones that I need
when clearly they aren’t.
You were a choice as well.
Every conversation was a choice
and you also were a casualty.
We were a casualty
and I let us die
foolishly.

A subtle sweetness I can taste in the back of my throat
and I smile.
The music lifts me off of the ground
and I feel overtaken by its rhythmic pulse which makes me happy and there is no other place I would rather be
than in the arms of you
again.

Alexis POV:
My body is struggling to breath
I'm wearing your shirt
Remembering everything we had
All the laughs and all the fights
I would take all of that on again
Just to be with you
I miss you
I bet you have forgotten all about me Harry
I love you so much
I just wish you would feel the same about me
I thought you did
You said you did
And I was a fool to believe you
Our memories are flooding my eyes
I don't think you understand how much you meant to me
Mean*
You still mean everything to me
I love you
Please reply to me

Grey is loss
Grey is blue
Grey is not what I think of
When I remember you.