I don't even know what to say,
Being this happy,
feels like a fever dream,
like I could do anything.

I feel like I deserve to live,
to do things,
to even have fun.

You don't know what you've done,
just by being in my life.
You've done more than make me feel human.
You make me feel relaxed,
beautiful,
and this feeling,
of heavenly happiness.
I never want it to go away.

Resting my brain
Despite restless strain
Hard to refrain
Even harder to change
Easy to be swayed
By constant delays
Saying this way
Will work today
Of course didn’t
So you make  
Another promise
Broken again

She probably had a smile, indeed, I unzipped her body bag.
Yet, she never once smiled alive.
However, she loved saying, “I thought about smiling; maybe someday?”

I won’t claim space  
you haven't softly opened,  
but in the gentle breath  
between silence and sound,  
I remain

Not as a shadow lingering  
nor a ghost from yesterday,  
but as someone who always saw you,  
clearly, tenderly,  
even when your heart feared  
what it meant to be truly known.

I know your quiet battles,  
the way you fear losing control,  
how it aches to reveal yourself,  
to step from shadow into light,  
uncertain if anyone could truly hold  
the weight and wonder of your soul.

I've seen you craft careful armor,  
watched you dance on edges of yourself  
longing to be witnessed,  
yet afraid the world  
might look too deeply,  
or not closely enough.

But I saw.

I saw the trembling courage  
behind every hesitant smile,  
the hidden poetry you wrote  
with whispered breaths,  
the strength in softness  
you thought went unnoticed.

I witnessed your silent bravery
the quiet way you loved,  
the gentle way you tried,  
the powerful beauty  
in simply showing up,  
even when you felt unseen.

We are worthy. We are capable. We are loved.

Especially when we're sick and tired or when we feel like laying in bed all day. Or when we actually do nothing the whole day. I want to remind us that this doesn't mean we're not productive, not capable or not worthy.

We're still as worthy as before, we're still as loved as before. It's just that our bodies and minds need to rest.
We actually need to rest regularly, but sometimes we forget that.

Now that I am sick I realized that and it's a relief to be there for myself although I feel so unproductive. I am loved. And you are, too. No matter what you're doing or not doing.

i am all alone
please don't lie and say
i am loved
because that's simply not true
life is pointless
why would you ever say
there's hope for me

(now read bottom up)

A knot work spell is an easy way
To breathe magic into macrame.
An anchor knot for an aid
so I don’t drop my braid.

I try to tie well,
for each knot is a spell
I don’t want to unravel.

Carefully binding
to seal in my intentions.

A mantra, repeated with each loop.

I am loved,
I am loved,
I am loved.