Monotonous

Monotonous
The word to describe the imminent danger that we seem to fall into, 
Once we become rhythmically sound, with whats going on, and is around
Just Us
And the world that we’ve been given
We shed, 
Still our dream seem to hide before they ever leave
And will never return
Unless we say 
Please

Falling into the trap that we lay for ourselves
Wrapped up
Just children believe they are aloud to
Become robotic
Sitting on the table chair
Reading hieroglyphs
Under circumstances I declare
That the world is full of simple gifts
Its not the way the we should,
Its not the kind that looks good, on just anybody
Especially me and my family
As we run on the treadmill trying to step further into the sea
But the emptiness, isn’t as clean as I hoped it would be
I still feel things
You know what I mean

Like the way we walk down the side walk
Talking to the trees tripping over rocks
While selling some ****, in your ***** bathroom socks
We can only bring so much attention
To the walls that hold all of our attention
Just long enough to sing the melody
We’ve already heard too much
We understand, but never plan to do anything about it
We allow it
We fall into it
We talk about
But we’re still stuck
Lost in the grip that never loosens
Which will hide the fact that we’re all held in nooses
Being told what to choose
And who loses

But thats not what I would like to see
While I sit on the fence post waiting for the final killing spree
We are not free
Yet
And I still see double when I think about the vet
If I was a dog and had an allergic reaction to some chocolate
It seemed worth it
The pay check I receive seems worth it
When returning to the cushy 1 bed room apartment that I sleep in 
On occasion
I seldom listen 
To just the radio stations
Just to have a little peace 
From the monotony that never seises

If I could envision a place 
Where there is no hate, 
Greed or Selfishness, 
Where people don’t allow themselves to be helpless 
To the ones who bring out the worst in us
It would be great 
Right?
It would so much better
If every letter you received could be read back with a smile

Like a mother when she sees her child, for the first time
And she thinks, what a beautiful life I have made.
It must feel so nice
But whats the reason why we grow up to live and then die 
Is it Because they say dreams are meant for when we sleep
Does that seem right?

Its almost as if the universe brings us down for a reason, 
To keep us in check as with the seasons
Tons and Tons of well rounded garbage
Being feed till our minds ache with discouragement 
Keeping the future blind
I know!!! 
But thats how it seems
At least to Me

For all things that gleam in the ocean
We only see a fraction
Of what our lives could be
Buts that what they want
Isn’t It?
As the expectations keep rising
We seem to find ourselves dying to make our lives unique
Even though every week we’ve spent 
Studying for that test
Cramming for that quiz

Just to see who is more equipped for this new phrase called "Real Life”
Get a load of this
The teachers say
Who can color inside the lines the best
Make sure you remember this because its on the test
But you don’t realize the power you possess

Its funny
I have never heard the teacher say “This is a good to know for “insert real life situation here"
And this is good to know for "insert real life situation here"
Never
Just Get the grade
A's are great
B’s are ok
And C’s are well bad, you must have been led astray
At least thats what my parents would say

I am almost 21
Ive been through grade school and college
With still no knowledge on those 2 simple words
Ive been thinking about this  a lot, and how I ought to do something great'
Something different 
Its unbelievable how many walls I have to overcome in order to change my winter

Even from my parents
Who scoff at the Idea of being different
You Don’t believe in me enough to trust that I won’t end up in handcuffs
No promises of course
I like to take me life one chord at a time
Singing my own melody to my song without rhyme
But the problem with that is
Everyone is afraid of there own bliss

You have to get a job that makes a lot of money
So you can do the things you want
But growing up means you have to make a lot a sacrifices
Which means you can’t do all the things you want
Thats just how it is
Isn’t that just awful?!

We surround ourselves with so much negativity and call it being realistic
We close and lock all of our doors because its safer
Everything is the way it is and thats how it will always be
And know one seems to think there is any other way

Now if everyone just followed those simple rules
We would still be without fire a place to stay cool
So why are we taught to color on the inside
And draw straight lines
When the people that have made the most impact on this place we call Earth
Drew outside the lines, without a ruler
Or even a pencil

Everything has become a cycle
On who's brave and who’s fearful
Change doesn’t have to be sudden or immediate
But in order to change your life you must never quit
Never be content with just ok, and I don’t mean grades
I mean Life
I mean experience 
I mean love
Because Love is really all you need
It really Is

I stress sometimes 
For the dreams Ive missed or left behind, 
The fine line of reality, and or individuality
Never have I ever severed the bridge that binds us together
But you have
My breath, heavily resting upon, her breast
Underlining her eyes, beyond the unseen sky
I wept only for your hands
Intertwined in the time we’ve wasted
Satiated with love and in all the wrong places
She will be loved more than ever
I wept only for her lips
I miss more than just the kisses, she would give
Tapering my heart to a shallow bliss
No longer will I hold you, In my arms I have none

The steps still creaked 
Even though the breathe on my neck has been stale for a week
I miss you more than ever
Severed by ties uncompressing measures
I just want you to come back home
I can show you how much Ive grown
So much I can show
Im a different person, 
I learned from my mistakes and less will be made
Without you
Is like driving on the fumes of gasoline 
From which has become empty 
Right before you drove to end of the earth with me
We’re different from other couples
Without all of the *******
Without any titles
Were just homegrown lovers caught between the cycles
Of peace and suffer 
Life or death
Love or Hate
Its not that the world is a bad place but sometimes Im left with a bad taste
In my mouth I can still feel your tongue ever so soft rolling around
As does mine
Feeling your heart beat as we disregard the oh so punctual time
It doesn’t matter when Im with you
We could drive with no destination
Talk with nothing thought of as a conclusion
You know what I mean?
Something about you changes me
Like the sun when it sets on the trees
Do you remember that day?
It was perfect
Everything Ive ever wanted
Just the two of us watching the verses of the world change
Into a symphonic chores blowing our minds to an oblivion away
If only you could see what I see
What crawls in the bed with me
Just to feel my ever rising heart beat
I miss that
I mean,
I miss you
I miss you more than ever
The way your smile crinkles your nose 
Your eyes so bright when we used to get ******
Together!
Soft meadows of apple blossom skin,
Just a touch and Im off on a binge
I can’t get enough of the way you make me feel
Your love is truly my drug
Im sorry for yelling
Im sorry for telling you all of those things I didn’t mean
In a way that made you slam the door and leave
Me alone
In this house, just a haunted memory of a door being closed and you’re gone forever
Nothing but the memories to make me better 
Only for a moment
Like a cigarette you think you’ll just have one
You think it’ll be fun
But then your hooked
I know this seems crazy
I know I wouldn’t say it
I was scared you wouldn’t believe it
I was scared you might forget it
But I love you with more of my heart then I can handle
I feel myself slipping away as though the sedatives have finally found my still so sober veins
I might not wake from this
I might not see you again
Just promise me one thing
Love with all your heart, and soon birds will begin to sing

Nothing I write can put forth the right attitude to this situation that keeps getting written about
I could shout at the clouds that world is not enough
But will that help
Will anything help this distasteful look to the side like I don't matter
Might as well shatter what's left of my bones in which have detached only themselves
From feeling anymore pain than they've already felt
You have brought the sadness in me to new heights
Climbing to the top isn't as fun the second time
Twice
I'm just your shadow
Hollow with emptiness that you fill me up with 
Just another day in the life of me and my best friend
I've got the glass half empty kind of view on life 
As it were underlined in white
My sight still not the best
I'm as short as I was in grade school
But that didn't seemed to matter as much back then 
So many words we would say about how we were together 
Different than the others
Perfect
We can live forever
Those words must not mean anything since you seemed to forget them more and more
I'm sorry if you're bored I'll try to be different more exciting
Unlike the sediment that keeps decomposing around me
I just miss you 
I miss the way we would talk about
Anything
And it kills me to never see you alone without your phone and your other half that think that she owns 
You
Were just a forgotten verse In the chorus of you and her
So then there's me
Cursed with a thousand hearts to roam the sea alone
Never shown which way to go
I just keep writing till I find my other muse
To invest the rest of my time in
Before this becomes a bruise

I haven't fallen 
Yet to rise it seems 
Im crawling in and out of breath
Testing the limits of your life and my death
Subjectively defying the gravity, that we lie in-between 
Screaming for a better way to stay clean, 
From all the lies that you meant to say
Just doubt melting from your face
Laced with despair, and sorrow
Borrowing my heart, discarding the lies you gave to start, with
Understanding half of what it is, depends on which truth decides to win
Bringing more pain, and anguish
Flustering failed attempts at love 
Shoved aside like a lonely lion cub 
Begging for mercy as the night breaks the awareness, surrounded by the rest
Protecting more that just her heart from the mournfulness of death
So sleep softly my child
For the light isn’t the only thing that shines in the wild

Sure she never said she loved me, 
But It felt real didn't it, 
Everything feels ******* real, 
This is real life isn't it, 
How can something be fake in a world so real, 
Its like a time bomb ticking, with a letter that pops out that says just kidding, 
And as you read it, you seem to dream of how it would be
How you would be, if nothing ever happened in the way it seemed, 
So can my thoughts be traced back to you and me, 
Seeing you scream as you woke up from a dream, 
I lean over to kiss you, but ended up missing you
As I fall asleep alone, with no one that loves you
I mean me

"Closer", She said
Gripping her hand on the foot of my bed
Looking back trusting only me
To love her as if this love will last forever
Holding her head back
Only pausing when were out of breathe
Testing our limits with no fear
Resting for seconds 
I feel her hands again
She whispers so soft to me
Leaning so close to me
Feeling her love underneath
As we crawl under the sheets
Edges so far the center we lie
Closing the bridge between you and I
I gathered my thoughts
Thawing the chill you sent down my spine
The words on my heart
They speak more than ever
Lets fall with grace my darling
For tonight we live forever

Don't underestimate, dilate or infatuate yourself with any one thing, person or activity 
To the square root of time divided by the tranquility
Within the boundaries of forever and infinity 
You can decipher it with love
Still debating whether or not life can be held with just one glove
Still we wait
I almost decided to close the gate
Lock the doors
Swear at the top of my lungs 
That this song has already been sung
But I didn't 
I can't win when my neck is still so hung
Up
On the fact that the human condition is still a sad rendition on what real happiness is trying to finish
Not until the end
She said
Not without a friend to hold hands with
Lie on the floor and in dreams you would dance with
I can't help it if we chose it
I can't help it if we're suppose to do it
It's not like I'm the one who gave you the power to abuse it
Please 
Calmly step forward 
Your passion will guide you to the new world order

She opens up once
In a trance
She believed she could dance
The shelf was no place to hide
A talent so brilliant
So resilient she was
With her posture so bold
Never taking kind to the cold
But she seldom complained
And she was never strange
The time I left
Like I tore her last page
If she would only understand
I don’t live life with a back up plan
Its been two weeks
I feel more ashamed
For the actions i've proclaimed
To be mine
Though they rhyme
I cant help but sing out of time
When she looks at me like that
I feel the pages turning in my head
Though nothing I say
Can open you up my own
I just realized
When we dance so close
I feel less alone