I found a way to temporarily quell my raging thoughts
I have made my own little world that I have full control of
I daydream of things that bring me happiness
It is my Utopia, it is where I can find euphoria
It is a falsehood I tell myself

An escape from reality
A breath of fresh air, the daylight in my darkest night
A safe haven I made for myself
A detachment from my problems
A fantasy where I am fine

We're all a little mad
In this world of spinning dreams.
Where teardrops turn to waterfalls,
And fate's determined by the sea.
We're all a little crazy
In this field of life and love.
With winding roads and rabbit holes,
And things you wouldn't dare speak of.
We're all a bit insane
Each dealt a different hand to play.
Though we shuffle the deck of cards,
The Queen of Hearts will still remain.
We're all a bit bizarre
In this place of mystery.
For time ticks faster, faster still,
A kaleidoscope like history.
We're all a little weird
Like Cheshire grinning ear to ear.
But in this Wonderland of Life,
Grand adventures find us here.
©KSS 8/2015

Sweet Blue,
Explore and run
Find a world
Where you could breathe

Dear Blue,
Whether it’s someone
Who saves you
Or just running in sleep

Find a world, my child
Find a place
Where you could breathe.

Cast into an iron box
Shut and put away
Somewhere that no one knows
Might as well be in the middle of the sea
Or in another galaxy

You can claw at the walls
Until your nails are ******

You can scream for help
Until your voice turns hoarse

You can tell yourself that you'll be fine
Until the words don't make sense anymore

You can close your eyes and try to make it disappear
Until you don't know what is real:
    The darkness below your eye lids
    ... Or the Darkness around you?

You lie in there
Until you don't know

What is up and down
What is sound and silence
What is real and imaginary
What is alive and dead

Which is you and which is the Darkness

We used to talk about
going
to Montana--escaping it all,
building a log cabin and
making a garden.  We were
going to hunt and fish for
food--make rugs and
hats from the fur.

But look at us now.
You live in the
city and drive a Volvo.
Goldfish in a glass bowl.
You even taught your
cat to walk on
a leash.
Can you see the
sky with all the smog?

I'm not any better.
Living under the bridge;
the only hunting I do is
for cans, the rare and
illusive
aluminum nickel, so that
I can buy *****.  

I walk down to the
river's edge and look up at
the expansive sky.
I close my eyes.
And when I open them, baby,
we're in Montana.

the sky darkened and decomposed into the blackness
giving up a trail of reflections and thoughts
thoughts in mind, sleeping into tomorrow
thoughts waiting to be released into the light
ahhhhhhh
feels so delicious to allow new composition to escape

Brian Hill - 2020 # 225

A childhood of blackberry stained fingers and butterfly kisses
That turned into cigarette scented Sundays
Mondays alarm is hardly the birth of a phoenix
Everything is so loud
So you make playlists to block the days out
Talk to therapists so your voice drowns the sounds
Of hearts beating to the symmetry of structure
Evenings spent drifting through conspiracies
That put your mind in and out of ease

I have a shortcut, I can show you

Into a world of leaves
Your hair will tangle with the trees
The rain will batter you
Wet silk and scars
Mark promises on your legs
But smoky seasoned scrambled eggs
And a woodpecker at a pine
Is now your divine alarm clock
It will curve your mood
Become your instinct
You’ll be able to tell
When thorns become soft
You dress to un-impress
Ragged ankles of an empress
Enter your utopia

On carpets of brambles
To be danced above
A crumpled tent hosts
Seven sweet sisters
Fresh from the flames
Soul mates are on auction
Interviewed by ghosts
Who decide your wedding gown
You are never unqualified
Don’t let the cold get you down
Don’t let the past nourish you
The way you forget to let the sun do
Hidden in the woods
Branches block the dreams out
Climb to where the schemes rhyme
Disregard your sodden socks
The needles of a helpless hairbrush
Accept the untameable
As you stumble, wild
Your soles bare
You know your worth
Your place upon the earth
You curl up in the dirt
But there’s a nice view
And it’s a green that patterns the cosmos
Subsides the madman’s blood lust
It’s the eyes of your mother
And the scent of an absent lover
Let it cushion you

At least until Monday

Sleep was my one escape
To rest from thoughts of you
But in the land of dreams,
There, you haunt me too.