Someday I'll have good news to share.
I'm sorry that I only tell
the parts of me I want to tear
away and send to burn in hell.

My life is a bit complex--
work and school and family
pull at me, and make me vex
my friendships and my ministry.

My body is shutting down;
I can't keep up with myself.
Sorry that I always frown
when my heart comes off the shelf.

Trust me: I want nothing more
than to be a better me
but I'm still a bit unsure
what the end result would be.

I just want to share my heart,
to share what I keep inside
but, for now, I cannot start
until in peace I will reside.

I can't give what I don't have
(it's quite sad, but it is true)
I can't split myself in half
while my parts are still askew.

Yes, I want to love you well,
but I'm not in a good place
to seek what makes my heart swell--
I'd be lying to your face.

This life isn't permanent--
I am still transitioning
into whomever I'm meant
to be living as, freely.

Times past, our driving word was ‘could’
As in we could do this or that
To help the world, to do some good

Then, strong ideas asked if we would
Let them then, step up to bat                  
Respect was asked, when we used ‘could’

That this meant work, we understood
And some attempts fell fairly flat
Yet help we did, and did some good

That fashion’s out, replaced by ‘should’
Imperative, we’re spoken ‘at’
Time’s passed when arguments have ‘could’

One must comply, it’s understood
By those who dictate online chat
Now ‘only we’, can do some good

And half the people see falsehood
When wrapped in hate, ideas are spat
It’s hard to see this do much good
Perhaps we should re-visit ‘could’


Cliff Green 2017

Stare into the gray.

Watch as I grow, billow, and loom over all.
Drown in the depths of me,
for I am an ocean pregnant with precipitation.
See the stark contrast between the green of the world
and the enormity of my existence.

Stare into the gray, for I am he.


Stare into the red.

See how I do not demand,
do not obscure, though I once reigned.
Follow the streamline of my form
splayed on the horizon,
for I am waning in my brilliance.
Feel the warmth I still exude
even as darker hues force me aside.

Stare into the red, for I am she.

When we were younger-
especially when we were particularly heinous-
you would tell us
that if it came down to it
you would choose our mother
over us
every
time.

Is it any wonder why
I can't
trust you?

What kind of a man says
he would leave his daughters in a heartbeat
if it meant supporting their spouse?
What man settles for one over the other
when both are his to protect?

None of us asked to be begotten.
None of us asked to be abandoned.
You were there
but you were there for her.
Now I look to other men
for the security I should have been able to find in your arms.

Those hands should have been used for more than discipline;
they should have been extended time after time,
mistake after mistake,
loaning us your strength
instead of administering it.

I'm too tired to argue.
I just need you to know
why I feel this ocean between us
even when we're closer than ever
to dry land.

How do I love You?
How have I loved You?
You shower me with gifts, with praises, with affection,
and I can't even give You the time of day.

I ask, I seek, I knock,
and You provide.
Why can't I do the same for You?

You ask to drink from my heart,
to let my tears quench Your Thirst.
How can I withhold?

You seek me in the wilderness,
in the darkness I shroud myself in.
How can I stay hidden?

You knock on the door of my heart,
my sanctuary,
to fill it with Your Life and Love.
How can I keep it shut?

I've whispered through the keyhole,
pressed my hand to Yours through the wood.
But why did I neglect to turn the ****?

Please don't go.
I haven't forgotten You.
I'm still on the other side of this door.
If You knock,
I promise I'll answer.

You let me hunger
so that I
starve for You-
without You, die.

You let me hunger
so I know
upon my heart
You want to sow.

You let me hunger
so I feel
satisfaction
when I kneel.

You let me hunger
so I see
priceless Love
upon that tree.

You let me hunger
so I seek
Your strength when
my will is weak.

You let me hunger
so my heart
knows from it,
You'll never part.

You let me hunger
because You thirst
for me to always
love You first.

Lord, I am hungry.
Fill me up
with your Flesh-Bread
and Life-giving Cup.

Lord, I am hungry.
Let me starve.
Upon my heart
Your trademark carve.

Lord, I am hungry.
Thank you, though.
For without hunger
I'd never know
how much I filled
my life with things
that dull Your brilliance
and make kings
of worldly pleasures.
Let me crave
Your Word alone
and help me brave
this war of willpower.
Pave the way
to Your Kingdom
for there I'll stay
for all eternity
if I
let You consume me
till I die.

Take me up
in arms of love
Metaphysically shove
me out of my
too-worldly self
Take my heart
off of the shelf
Dust it off
Polish the core
Breathe out a
desire for more
of You. The muscle
meant to house
the Lord of Lords
lets in a louse
more often than
I would prefer.
You know this.
And still You stir
within me a
desire to see
who You have
made me to be.
I love You.
You know this.
Hold me close
and gently kiss
this broken vessel
beat by beat
when I succumb
to defeat.
Take my life,
take everything
due to You,
Beloved King.