You are allowed to believe whatever you want
Believe that rainbows will always double,
That a *** o’ gold awaits you on the other side
Believe that bad men come quickly and go sooner,
That everyone is happy
Every blade of grass hides an Easter egg
Every rock hides a humble, quiet little home
Every river is made of molten chocolate…

Believe that everyone is safe and happy
Believe that people never do intentional wrong,
No such thing as assault, physical, ******, mental, emotional
Psychological…

Just when you do, make sure you open your eyes once in a while
Ignorance could be the death of you
And if you stayed in such a world…
It’s called being delusional.

And I only want the best for you,
So I wish those bad men never arrive
That those rocks remain a hiding place
Those blades of grass contain secrets of happiness
That those double rainbows have a lucky leprechaun skipping across them
That your “*** o’ Gold” shall never empty to gambling or addiction
And that those chocolate rivers never empty
And, most importantly, that such a happy world remains untouched
By reality,
And you, too, remain untouched
So sweet dreams, compadre,
I’ll see you in reality soon.

i. I almost forgot the taste of cold blood on my lonely tongue and tears in my throat but then I found your old poetry book and I felt glass shards fall into my mouth as I read over every single pathetic word you wrote.

ii. I almost forgot the taste of broken promises under my bent bones and honey in my skin but then I saw your pictures in the paper and I felt firecrackers explode in my ribs as I looked at her head tucked in your chin.

iii. I almost forgot the taste of winter dew on my summer’s dress and apple cinnamon in my hair but then I visited your old vintage café and I felt too bitter coffee drown my limp body without as much as a care.

iv. I almost forgot the taste of caramel kisses on my hips and cotton candy in my lungs but then I heard your voice and I felt sour sweets bury my candy cane skeleton as I listened to the verse you sung.

v. I almost forgot the taste of dead roses on my hands and black violets in my heart but then I remembered your proposal and I felt diamonds cut open my burning flesh as I thought of your abrupt depart.

That’s it.
I almost forgot.
I almost forgot what it was like to meet you, to love you, to lose you.
But then, I remembered.
I simply remembered meeting you and loving you and most horribly, losing you.
Who knew an act so simple could be so terrifying to do?
But then again, who knew a human made of cartilage and 70% water could be too?
But I guess you weren't really made from all that,
You were made from cinnamon and chestnut,  
from 45% stardust and 10% gold,
And a part of you was painted to look like the sky and the rest of you, like the ocean, cold.
Well, at least in my eyes you were, still are.
And I think that’s why I can never truly forget you, no matter how hard I try, no matter how I run, how far.

I still remember the boy with roses for fingers and not thorns for hands.
I still remember the boy with oceans for eyes and not storms for body lands.
I still remember the boy with gold for blood and not oil for veins.
I still remember the boy with love in his heart and not a heart full of pain.

Do I love him? I don’t know
Do I miss him? I don’t let it show
Do I want him? I can’t be sure
Do I need to forget him? As fast as I can or I'm going to go mad searching for a cure.

*~ {I have trouble remembering a lot of things, but I can’t seem to forget you}~

Go on;
swallow yourself whole.
force each tasty piece of *******,
each lie you tell yourself.
Open wide and fit all in.
Gorge on;
your manufactured nuance,
shout the praise of your “brand.”
don't let the real you out;
crush it in your hand.