One day, Smiles will replace these Tears.

One day, Self Confidence will replace these Fears.

One day, Praisings will be more than Complains.

One day, Happiness will be more than Pains.

One day, Dreams will become Reality.

And on that One Day, you'll surely Remember ME...

Hey, past me from so close yet seeming long ago...

A knot from my sweater's bow I regret tying despite how unkempt the ribbons look hanging by my sides because now it's digging into my back

The hair I can't decide if I want out where it's pretty and makes me look less like a generic nerd yet gets in my face and food and life

The jeans I insist upon wearing without a belt even though their slipping down my **** may actually outweigh the pain of loosening the belt

The tennis shoes I'm too attached to give up that emit a constant squeak, squeak, squeaking through the hallways whether it's caused by residual rain from outside or not

The glasses, fond of slipping down my nose at frequent intervals, covered in smudges I rarely notice till they get out of hand

The phone whose screen happened to crack at the most inopportune moment and takes forever to read my finger print

The jacket that should be a highlighter blue but rather presents itself as a canvas of the week's tomato stains

The face covered in acne-
The stomach with fat instead of muscle-
The arms lacking muscle-
The legs with too much hair-

I've always acknowledged that perfection is not possible, yet I have to at least try to strive

I think, as I sit at my desk, fingers typing fragmented sentences, attempting to convey thoughts speeding too fast to grasp

Yet, just a simple poem of reflection brings to light these numerous deficiencies, many of which I COULD fix were it not the invisible fiend upon whom I stamp the label-laziness

These deficiencies, many of which aren't even noticed by those around me, some of whom are better some are worse

But it's not as simple as that, I've known I can't just be "one of the people", I need to find something, some identity, some way out of my seemingly impossible to escape label of "just above average"

In academics, in extracurricular activities, EVERYTHING, I seem to be at a stagnant

I've done bad, I've done "just above average", but never above. What is the point if you get plenty of losses and plenty of "fine" but no victories?

It's something about me though, somehow I believe, subconsciously, I'm impeding myself. I'm holding myself back.




...



Why?

May be we can leave this place
and go to mars
right now
at this moment
But do not forget
our feet is still on the earth
where he lives
  
He
whose day is still measured
by the brightness of sun
and he never felt
he has a mind to think
or a heart to feel
All what he learned
is to work and work
under the shining sun
and in night storms  

He does not understand
what you need to live
and can not imagine
your assets price
What he knows and
what he aims
is only a full plate of rice  

So don’t go to him
and complain
You wanted chicken
and somebody fed you beef  

Don’t go and tell him
name of brands of your drink
and percentage of alcohol  
they carries
Because you can't count
for a drop of water
how many innocent dreams
were buried  

Don’t go to him
and tell
he should pray in a temple
or lit a candle
before Jesus
Because  
with the burden of
filling many empty stomachs
he can be worried
but can not be nervous  

Don’t go and compel him
to stand before you
or oppose you
because you feel
he needs to speak
  
You don’t know
words started losing their meaning
before him
from the day
he stopped thinking
about the furious wolfs
and started walking in the dark    

May be somewhere
inside his mind
he knows
the furious wolfs
can't ****** his muscles
and touch his struggle  
Only thing they can do
is...stand on the road
made from sweats of others
and bark  

So you don't need to
go to them
and shout
how you feel about the words
he never spell

If possible  
please go
and  build a way
that will connect
your smile and
his faith