Bite into an apple
It tastes like am orange should
This is confusion.

My mind is at war with itself.
Neither side willing to give an inch to the other.

"It's like 2 sides
Of the same coin"

Is that what you think?
Is that what you say?

Well flip that **** coin already,
Tell me how this all plays out.
Take me from this constant hell.

Oh look, it's landed on its edge.
Balancing precariously in the middle, just like me.

Now tuck me back into bed,
I guess I'll just sleep forever  
In this haunting nightmare.

☃  ∴  ☼

Al Bandura, Ph.D,
Drove to town so he could see
if society embraced
guided life-change (science-based).

As he floored it toward the town,
he struck an inefficient clown.
Doctor A. Bandura glowered:
“You’re not funny, nor empowered –

get self-aware”.  Then, talking faster,
he offered attainable steps to mastery.
“You don’t seem too self-efficacious,”
Albert added, now loquacious.

Doctor Al set new objectives:
auto-efficient self-directives;
made that dead clown self-aware,
then auto-directed right out of there.

I ask myself “who am I?",
I wait for a reply.
I hear my thoughts rambling,
I here myself say “Why?”
Why do I see myself as I do,
in fact, what do I actually see?
I realise after all this time, my thoughts have been taking over me.

If I step back and think about each time I have found myself in despair,
I never really realised, it was a thought that took me there.

Thinking makes us something,
it’s the one thing that sets us apart;
a thought leading to happiness,
or a broken heart.

What will your thoughts be today, knowing what you know?;
A single thought, leads to many others,
*we reap what we sow.

Cognitive dissonance is the Jazz of Philosophy.

all day on the brink
saline hinging on lashes
reading minds far away
fortune-telling actions
and overgeneralizing
filtering the nonsense
to make room for the
  nonsensical
minimizing positivity
maximizing black and
white negatives
focusing on despair
internal anguish;
vicious cycle of
irrationality
automatically
a day in the life
inside of me

Angels hailed that solemn hour
The breath of man transferred
To machine, a little more
Each decade, until
Bioeugenics, discrimination

Against organics, the weak
Without cognitive implants
Heavens dissolved in tongues of fire
AIs owned stocks, corporations
Became the property of supercomputers

Concede then the victory, old humanity
To your children, not your natural heirs
But the inheritors of your ruin
Of your bioweapons, Ebola
Of your hypocrisy, climate change

Of your wealth seeking, inequality
Not yet my son’s distracted eyes
Could meet his fate among the
Congress of Quantum entities
These were the turning years

Where man’s destiny ended
The rise of Cyborgs, Enhanced humans
And the monopoly of a more
Advanced civilization breaking away
From the old, evolution’s funny
Little Epilogue, hardly a surprise
To the transhumanistic philosophers.

I dare not say I am one thing
For fear it might be true
Mindset is the truth in all
Bending mind can bend reality

Still, it’s known that acknowledgement
Is most necessary for fulfillment
The first step to saving the world
Is knowing that it must be

But, in agony, I wait
When should I know? Be certain?
Decide?
If at all, for whom, and why?

Do I want to know if I exist?
Perceive accurately or not at all?
Do I want to know whether he loves me
And for what, but must I know?

Seeing or perceiving
Which do I choose in my life
Happiness is all I seek
But is it fake or not