I walked outside to smell some flowers,
Their anthers blowing in the breeze
But while my plan was to sniff them for hours,
What sprung up?
It wasn't weeds.

As I bent down to smell the roses,
And the brilliant, white daisies
Suddenly I felt a tickle in my nose
What really sprung up?
My allergies!

Hot and sticky
this yellow pollen is
plugging up
it so seems
my entire head
I can't think straight
my mind is blank
my nose feels
twice as large
my brain is full of cotton
I can't hear
a single thing you say
The streets
are covered
in this dreaded color
Until the next day
when a heavenly cloud  
is spotted
and luckily another
and then another
a single drop descends
and is followed
It  banishes
the hot sticky air
to be replaced
by a wet and fresh smell
the yellow pollen
is washed away
from the streets
and my head

It take too long to realize that I'm nearest to death. I thought it was just a simple allergies that i could encounter but i was wrong, any minute my heart could positively stop because of the unpleasant beat. I cant even enjoy swimming within an hour because of the cold water. Even air in the morning. I have to scratch my whole body and cant even enjoy the blist of the morning air. And the worst part is that, it was a lifetime treatment. I don't know if i could take it whenever my body is getting thick and hurt or whenever i cant breath or I'm shaking. I'm getting tiered of being self pity, its like i cant even help my self and i need others to do that. Em i that luck enough?? I was always in the hospital ever since, I'm always sick and diagnose in everything. I wish i was just normal as others. But i guess I'll just treat this as a gift from God. Well I'm just blessed after all* :)

I'm a human
man I can't believe
this weather
it's killing me
germs
germs
germs
when will they learn
my nose isn't a playground
they know, I know
I can't say no
it's a clogged kitchen sink
I can't tell if my **** stinks
tissue
tissue
tissue
military issue
sinus warfare
it's so unfair

The sun is grey
Yet it lights up the day
Not all who see understand
The sight they view
I personally barely see past the grey
Yes there is blue in the world
Yes indeed there are lots of colors
Some people are color blind.
I only see color sometime
I am constantly battling the mania
Which can be described as all the colors attacking at once
And battling depression
Which is blankness attacking and the voices telling you to JUMP!
Whispering JUMP!!!!
Do it! You won't...
There sweet voices pleading.
Jump you beautiful girl.
People will love you on the other side.
You will be appreciated in the other world.
In the next world.
You belong there.
Just jump! Follow the light sweet girl.
Don't call me that!
Only one person I know can call me that and you are not her.
She is the reason I stay in this world.
It's not my time yet.
One day it will be, but not yet.
There's feeling behind the music I listen to.
"When my time comes around lay me gently in the cold hard ground." Not a day too soon.
I want to spend everyday on earth with the people who don't make me worthless.
Yes I understand I am sick in a few ways but I am getting better. Mentally I am being cured by having friends. My little nerdy sweet friend. ❤️ Love you!
And even though I will never not be allergic to majority of the things I eat and the allergies are getting worse and more are popping up its okay because I am happy now and know I have people who would care if I died. So I silence the thought and go right up to the people who care. They love me and I love them.

I keep words unspoken,
Letters uncombined,
A theme unwritten.

I write words through moments,
Creating memories,
Leaving a past that lasts.

I profusely give silence,
To those whom try to convey,
And now a loner in a glass fence.

Allergic to socializing,
I keep mine emotions from expressing,
And I retain the evidence of longing.

I keep my days short of being social,
And keep peoples ****** lies distant,
Not famous cause am always Local.

Green buds, fresh mowed grass,
Bees and pollen everywhere;
I can't stop sneezing.

it's the emptiness
it's the hatred that builds up in the creases of your
smile, of the laughter you hide your disgust with

it's the appointments you tear from your organizer
the holes in your stomach
the sunburn on your shoulders; the redness of your nose

it's your incurable phobias
your cut-up legs
your bleeding nose
your teary eyes
your itchy back
your raw skin

swollen lips
bare nails
unkept hair
ugly voice
tiredness

why the ****'d you think spring would fix you?

It's funny how
Food makes allergies,
But people, people
Make anxieties

Nuts make me red
Fish make me choke
I can't eat this, but
You and I are fine.

Let's see you when
You see some skeleton
Of the someone you shared
And you suffocate.

When I hear you I go red,
When I talk to you I choke
I can't see you, but
Food and I are fine.

Nourishment has two meanings,
I feed from you,
But obviously
I'm allergic to what you give me.