some nights i think i am cain without an abel
i hate my brother for never having been
i carry him, keep him, like he happened
he is heavy and i have never met him
i would hate him if he was flesh and i wish he were me
i killed him before he was alive, ruined eve's body by living
i am the first poisoned crop that made the field untillable
i killed him as he slept and i hadn't met him yet
some nights i hear him around the house
he lives in the gaps in my mother and father's conversation
some nights i think i am cain
missing an abel more for never having held him

Cain killed Abel, for Abel was favoured.
Losers need losers, for then nobody wins.
Rather a robber be king, and all be robbed.
The mark, a small price to despise the favoured.
Why Trump? Because *******! That’s why.

Abel died
After three days
He appeared
Wheel within wheel

I’d rather be your enemy,
Than any friend you think I’d be.
Come and talk to me,
I’m easy to reach.
I dropped the world for you before,
So what makes you think,
I wouldn’t do it once more?
Your pride and insecurities stop you,
Put them to the side.
If they changed the way I felt,
I would have left you by this time.
If only you knew,
This feeling I still have for you.
Friends means the end of me.
I’d much rather be your enemy.

how would life be
if we lived in a
     house of balloons?

personally,
     i would hate it.

every morning
i would wake up
and *****
every
single
     balloon.

i would shatter
every
single
    glass table.

i would walk
among the shreds
of bursted latex
and shards
of broken glass
cutting my feet to bits.

i would drench
the furniture
in kerosene
and light up a cig
and drop the ****
in the path of the fuel.
causing the
     house of popped balloons
and
     broken glass tables
to go up in flames.

only to go to bed
and repeat it the next day.
because im too scared to move out
but too attached to leave.
so i do what i can
to make myself feel
     powerful
and
     in control
and
     dominant.

Oh how I knew
that I had too much to do

but instead of doing what needed to be done
I sat around and did none

too many things are on my brain
I almost feel like Cain

but instead of Abel being my brother
I am killing another

another me
a productive we

A me who could see the things to be done
but alas the current me had outrun.

He watches; quiet, reflective.
No doubt he detected
The weight of my
Body-shaped shame.
My name similar to his,
Who now rots under sunlight,
Unabashed in his righteousness
To which I was blind.
I find myself here,
In a garden once perfect,
Now tainted with ******.
I heard the scratching,
Faint at first,
So I turned and saw him.
The raven watches;
Quiet, perceptive,
His gaze so effective.
His foot scratches the ground,
Making a sound that feels
Almost peaceful.
He unearths the freedom
That I need him to show me.
Just below me,
The earth is opening up.
I grab my brother's limp arm,
Drag him away
From the evidence of his harm.
Further away
From the judgment of God.
The raven approves;
He quietly nods.

"I'm always getting high cuz' my confidence low...
And I'm always in a rush, ain't no time to **** slow
It's not something I don't know...
But I'm sure I'll make you *** do it three times in a row...
And I'm sure you would've left but that ***** in control...
That ***** in control..."

"I like the thrill...
Nothings ever made me feel so real
So don't leave me here alone,
I don't wanna spend tonight alone..."

I will ******* right, til' you tired to leave me
I will do you right...
Until your subconscious got you screamin' my name
Crave me...
Sensuality got you fallin'
I am your void.

Let the madness be the only thing you embrace as your soul craves me like a drug.
There is beauty behind the madness.
Look
Can you see?
Devour your senses I shall...

So tell me you love me,
Just for tonight
For one night only

Little baby Abel
Rocks in his cradle
He doesn't know his fate yet
But his killer he has met

Little boy Cain
Standing in the lane
He doesn't know his fate yet
Wonder if he'll feel regret

Abel always did what he was told
Cain was adventurous and bold
Abel was the baby, apple of his parent's eye
Cain could see this and it made him cry

Look after your younger brother he was told
And with that anger was sowed
Cain couldn't go and do his own thing
To his brother he was chained

And the day at the alter was the final straw
Cain was filled with jealousy by what he saw
Even God loved Abel more than him
So he committed his first sin

A split decision was made
And soon on the ground his brother layed
Abel's blood soon soaked the ground
And from heaven came an awful sound

God spoke to Cain for the very first time
"In this land that is mine"
"You can no longer stay"
"You now must travel far away"

Now their parents lost two sons
They had showen more favor over one
And in return they lost both of them
Abel killed by his brother's hand, Cain by God himself condemned