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KA de Vallance Sep 2015
I hope you have another drink
I hope it tastes as sweet as you like them
I hope it burns just the right way
I hope it makes you warm inside
I hope it keeps you happy
I hope you have another drink
I hope it tastes like the last one
I hope it burns all the same
I hope it ignites a flame inside you
I hope it keeps you sane
I hope you have another drink
I hope it tastes like hell
I hope it seeps into your bloodstream and burns your whole body
I hope the fire inside consumes you
And I hope it doesn't keep you alive
KA de Vallance Mar 2015
You are the scars on my chest.
The deep lines like an epitaph engraving right below my heart.
Each scar a ****** stanza
of the poem
you know you wrote.
This is very old
KA de Vallance Mar 2015
Sparklers, fireworks and simple flame has drawn my attention since I was young.
I almost set my moms apartment ablaze at 5 years old.
She said,
"You play with fire, and you'll get burned. Or worse, you'll burn everything down."
She never told me that one day a boy would set a fire in my soul and never return to put it out.
She never told me I'd have to water it down to unusable kindling.
She never said that wet wood would warp.
She never told me that cutting off the oxygen would suffocate me, too.
I guess she shouldn't have to though, because if you play with fire, you could burn it all down.
I just never thought that "all" would mean me.
you're back again to tend to it, but it's too dull and damp to rebuild
  Mar 2015 KA de Vallance
Sarah Wallace
I feel like I know you but I dont. I feel i'll love you but I won't. I dont want to. So I float. Between what I knew and what I Want. Coating layers of walls haunting these halls I thought I'd have the ghost if him. But hes gone like the smoke that left after dawn. I feel like I know you but I dont. Something could be wrong. Youre something new and i won't let go and I won't hold on. I'll be somewhere in between . real life and my dreams. In knowing what is wrong and what is right it seems. Broken at the edges blooming flowers at the seams. Oceans bending making room for the light . this sunshine that shines down on me. And the moon in the dark of night . I feel in complete harmony with tonight. And my heart tells me I can be free with the world is at my feet. Yet sometimes I cannot move. For fear that the steps laid out for me might change might fall into what I thought I could never meet. A destiny I wish to keep. Under the stars and the sun with the light of day. Please dont take this sunshine away. I thought I knew you but maybe I dont . you thought you did too but maybe you won't. But maybe still, maybe you will.
  Mar 2015 KA de Vallance
Rani
They asked me if
I'd ever done drugs.
And I told them about
Your eyes.
You were my drug of choice.

- Rani Olivia
  Mar 2015 KA de Vallance
W Winchester
when I wanted to turn my wrists into christmas gifts and slice them with paper cutters to see if I could find a better tomorrow written in my veins

where were you

when I wanted to pour my tears into a Xanax and Clorox cocktail and get buzzed on the thought of angel wings tearing my back open

where were you

when I took a heart shaped box full of rotted sweets and poured it in the gasoline that lit our first kiss, watching the good intentions burn to ash on the pavement

where were you

when I tore up the tear-stained ink-heavy pages of love notes and tossed them into my backyard stream

where were you

when I took off the bracelet you made me and tied it to the traffic sign on the bridge where the police found me

where were you

when I was handcuffed to a bench in a stone holding room singing our song over and over again, screaming unintelligibly at every officer who asked for my name

where were you

when I called every night, wondering why you decided not to speak to me anymore

where were you

when I checked my messages and saw "*****" where I said "sweetheart", "******* ******" where I said "I'm sorry."

where were you

when I tied my last hope to a tree on the beach and swung from it

where were you

when I prayed the rope would snap just as easily as my heart did

where were you

when I stood on your doorstep in the rain, wishing that I didn't remember your address

where were you

when I was passed out on the curb, drunk and alone

where were you

when I was curled under a desk, screaming at the rain and kicking the locked doors

where were you

when I was at the cliffs, counting the jutted rocks and trying to measure the exact angle I would need to fall

where were you

when I finally decided enough was enough,
and took every piece of my glass heart and used it to carve a new person

But love,

where were you

when I needed someone to hold me while I was hurting?
me? bitter? nah
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