you sometimes stumble into these situations
without even wondering
how else to later describe them:
verbatim...
however the mundane the details
are...
i should a series or something,
Gibsberg-esque, not not quiet
'what thoughts i have of you,
walt whitman...
i went into
the neon fruit supermarket, dreaming of
your enumerations!'
but still... scenes from supermarkets...
more grit, realism...
just like tonight:
went for two beers and a whiskey with
thoughts, more alligned to:
why do i dream so little?
why the weight of thanatos' clepsydra
on my chest upon waking
from a dreamless night -
as if: starless in...
places like a district in seoul...
well...
i found myself standing in line to
the cashier...
some guy behind me was asking
by name / nametag (a high rarity event
of the general impersonal take on
shopping - or in matter of fact...
the degredation of the sellers...
unlike elsewhere,
circa 1980s Poland - where the
saleswoman amassed a status of ms.
and the buyer was never a mr.
or a mrs. but a strippen-barren you -
now exchange the words,
pani / ty
lost in translation)...
(Karen)
about lightlubs...
i.e. yeah, they were different...
but in front of me... a real curiosity...
placed the beer and the whiskey
next to the cashier...
stood casually for...
" no apparent reason"...
a decent 2 minutes...
the guy started fiddling
with two debit cards,
and a handful of change...
i mean... 2pence coins 1 pence coins...
twenties, maybe a quid,
tens etc.
first he tried one card
on the contactless... failed...
then he gave the handful
of change to the cashier
who started counting it...
she counted: almost three quid...
i.e. not enough
for what he was about to steal...
all the gift of the gob...
i mean: those little conversations...
you know the yappy yappy puppy
sort... talk like honey...
or an aqua-man...
just kept pouring
out... excuse here there, excuse there...
apologised to me for waiting...
sure sure...
he was given his spare change
back...
so he takes out another card:
again, fails on the contactless...
so he's asked to insert it and use
the pin...
oops, says the cashier... failed...
oh... a quick glance at the clock...
an open carrier bag... next to the thing he's
going to steal...
mouth of honey doubles down...
what time will you be closing?
15 minutes...
oh that's alright then,
i'll just come back with the missing change...
walks away...
and i'm like...
did you see that?
only my eyes are talking.
cashier no. 1: see what?
security guard: (too late)
cashier no. 2 leaving
work, fiddling with her
shopping on the self-checkouts:
(she'll come into this story when
i'm walking out with my whiskey
and beer,
i'm eyeing her queerly
she's eyeing me huh? passing me
she starts muttering to herself)
he knows he knows
(gritted teeth talk)...
as i look at the security guard,
a colt... quick on the mark!
linford ******* christie quick...
i did love the little shuffle and mini
dance as he tried to avert himself
from me...
point being...
it's a petty crime...
i did one better...
less theatre, stole a c.d. from a...
w.h. smith...
cds books...
but **** me... all that theatre
using spare change, cards,
mouth of honey, confusion... for the item
that i saw being stolen?
so i thought:
maybe this guy is moving up in life...
maybe there's this sort of jinx
for thieves,
that you have to steal this item
before you do a bank heist...
or the jewelers...
just something...
i mean... i've heard of ******
junkies stealing meat from supermarkets
to sell et&
i mean...
me stealing a c.d. from a store...
with cameras everywhere...
but this guy... it had to be... he was
probably told by some guys:
you can't do a proper job
on a bank if you don't steal this piece
of item first...
because who, the ****,
would steal... a pair of woman's tights?!
unless he has a gig
as a drag queen...
a fetish...
or... eh?
i mean... that's like...
why the **** would i even
watch the movies?
- and... i can't even make this up...
unless... a very...
what sort of man would be
with a woman who tells him:
even if you don't have the money...
you better steal for me... a pair of tights...
yeah...
berkeley 1955...
ginsberg thinking about
whitman walking into the neon fruit
supermarket...
essex 2019...
me thinking about how i don't
dream enough walking into
a supermarket and seeing
linford ******* christie security
guard do a little dance
after he realised
that the mean before me
just stole a pair of woman's tights;
hardly a ******* comparison.