Parker A Blackwood

Parker A Blackwood Apr 2016

I can’t be here and I can’t be there
All is an illusion, all is fake
Because there isn’t there, so I can’t go there
And here’s not here because here isn’t here
I can’t be here and I can’t be there
Where might I be?
Here’s the present, there’s the mind
Here’s no here and there’s not there
So I float into the oblivion of the world unknown, the world unseen, the world unheard, the world unfelt
This world’s not this world
I become utterly confused of where I am and where I’m not
Who I am and who I’m not
All logic and all reason is lost by now
This conflict leaves me floating in a blank space
In which I cannot leave until the proof:
That here is here and there is there
And I am now

#sadness #alone #confusion #loneliness #isolation

Parker A Blackwood Apr 2016

The Strength of A Thousand Minds

Her hands are soft, but always cold
They are graceful and have a purpose with every move
When she speaks, her words are blunt and powerful
But every now and then her voice wavers
Filled with empathy, sadness, and fear
As she understands the pain and suffering
She tries to contain these actions to her emotions
But she's human too

#love #fear #pain #sadness #suffering #psychology

Parker A Blackwood Apr 2016

Hope in Love

I miss her so much
She was the only person who made me feel important to someone
She acted like she cared
I felt like I was loved
It could've been an act
But I'd like to believe it was true
I'd like to believe a person loved me as much as I loved them

#love #sadness #pity #heartbroken #loneliness

Parker A Blackwood Apr 2016

No Escape

When you run through the trees to escape the fire
You place yourself deeper into the woods
and, then, all of a sudden, you've lost your way
The sky gets dimmer, eyes turn grimmer, as your throat grows tighter,
You've pulled your own trigger

#depression #anxiety #hopelessness

Parker A Blackwood Mar 2016

Ever Since

There are officially no motivators
I am gone from this world already
Been gone since my mother found me lying on my bathroom floor
Slowly dying, covered in blood and *****
Never woke up that morning
Been gone ever since
In my head
Only thing that exists is this mind and this heart
The world around is fake
I'm not here, never was

#suicide #depression #lonely #heart #alone #dead #mind #gone #selfharm #hopelessness

Parker A Blackwood Mar 2016

On This Earth

What if you have no point on this earth?
What if you don't belong on this earth?
What if you're not imperative to anyone on this earth?
What if you are just existing on this earth?
What if, for you, there is no happiness on this earth?

You just shouldn't be here
You should be somewhere else

Where you have a purpose
Where you fit
Where you are loved and needed
Where you can live
Where you feel happiness for once in so long

#love #suicide #depression #life #death #world #earth

Parker A Blackwood Mar 2016

Living Nightmares, Talking Daydreams

Do you ever hear things that aren't there?
Like blood-curling screams
Your name being yelled
A radio playing 40's music and commentating on a derby
Or Arguing

Do you ever see things that aren't there?
Like a shadow creeping closer and closer to you every time you blink
Floating orbs
Or a man who is supposed to torture you and **** your parents

Do you ever mistake the world inside your head for the world outside?
A best friend who isn't real
A family who isn't dead
A scary man who isn't alive
Or an event that isn't circumstantial

Do you ever predict the future?
A death
Or a life

Do you ever think yourself to be insane?

Yeah, me too.

#depression #alone #dreams #mind #insanity #crazy #head #nightmares