Other men look
with interest and intrigue
while I walk behind you,
small,
as you take lead

I look them in the eyes
hoping they sense the hurt in me,
seeing my distress,
praying they will come set me free

So as I walk in your shadow
shameful
and unimportantly
I'm hopeful
my worth
will shine
for all the others to see
~

I moved to the mountains
to experience elevation
But the mountains
are pushing me
closer to extinction

No one loves you.
No one loves you.
The voice reminds me
as the loneliness creeps back in.

No one loves you.
No one loves you.
The words slip off my tongue so easily,
and it feels so truthful to say.

NO ONE loves you.
NO ONE loves you!
It blows me away that this is where I am today,
but it's where I reside
and it's somehow comforting.

No one loves you.
No one loves you..
Days go by;
I am invisible.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Out of strength, out of time.

Nana
Your skin was so thin
your structure, so frail
but your mind so available
like a puppy
down a trail
You would hold me close
my red hair and skin pale
I miss the smell of liquorice
that was always so stale
But I wouldn't care
because your presence was fresh,
calming
exhale
Every night
bedside
an enlightening tale
And your grasp so warm
at night when I'd wail
for my mothers absent touch;
your love purer than hers,
consistently,
without fail
So I hope you're watching
Nana
and know
my love for you
will always prevail

my brain is the logic
full of wisdom and precision
keeping me inline
making carefully planned decisions

my heart is the emotion
full of wonder and hope
pushing my boundaries
until it is broken
unknowing how to cope

my gut holds other worldly knowledge
it throbs when flags are red
considered the second brain
if I chose not to listen
by now, I'd be dead

my soul is a combination
of the energy in my gut, heart and head
it is kind and fragile
delicate like fine silk thread

But who do I listen to?
Who will lead me to the right choice?
They are in a constant battle
when all I long for is to rejoice.