You have a blank piece of paper in front of you...
                        

                     Go ahead

       Let your heart pour out ...
            Write your own story...

Make changes
Underline key ideas
Don’t be afraid to erase problems

The paper is blank
You have the power to fill it up
    How you want it
        With positivity
           With love
              Write your own story...

We may have been toxic.
But it was a toxicity
I could call my own.
Since I was young,
I’ve had a hard time
keeping things for myself.
My dreams, my ideas,
even my love
for the color purple.
These were all mine
at one point.
Soon to be
ripped away
by an envious, more outspoken friend
But this.
This toxic waste land of a love.
It was mine.
No one else wanted it and
no one else could have it,
The love I possessed was…
Unconventional.
But it was mine.
I was happy
being unhappy.
If I was able to argue with her
at least that meant she was there.
She was a present figure in my life
for me to hate to love, and love to hate.
But now she's gone.
I can't love nor hate.
I can't even have a friend in the one I loved.
So yes, it was toxic.
Yes, it was torturous,
but it was mine.

One
Two
Three
Four

One means hope
Thinned hair
Nausea

One
Two
Three
Four

Two frays your nerves
Bald heads
Tired limbs

One
Two
Three
Four

Three brings pain
Chemo filled veins
Faltering hearts

One
Two
Three
Four

Four is the end
Fills you up
Destroys you

One
Two
Three
Four

Cobbles

I had forgotten
How the Artic wind could
Sear its path up the Dublin Quays and flood
Into the streets
Tearing the very surface off
Everything it touches

The cobbles seem to shiver and ask to be brought
Inside
The paving slabs have already resigned
To their destiny

Feet shuffle past
Ignoring the multitude of stoney beggars

It's October
Dublin has turned off
The welcome sign.

In the beginning  it was all fun and games

It was nice to have you caring for me

The next time it happened you left me behind

I didn't care, I was feeling just fine

When I noticed it was getting out of my control

I decided I should probably stop

As hard as I could, I tried to end what you begun

As hard as I could, I just couldn't do

It was eating me from the inside out

I hated but thanked you for proving me weak.



I thought I could fight it, I can't without him

And now that he's left, there's a hole in my chest

I've tried to fill it with all I could think

His presence was just too big for me to succeed

What I thought was right was just making me numb

Now that he's gone I found out

I need him more than before



"I'll see you

In another life"

That's all you said when you left me that night

I was too proud to admit what it was

You were my drug

And once you were gone

All the symptoms showed up



Trying to replace one thing with another

Easier said than done

But I see a light at the end of this road

I thought I'd lost you

But perhaps I didn't

I know how to see you again

I'll just trace back all your steps

I will, too, leave my everything behind

But not really

Since you're all I want