When you first looked at me like I was a rare gem, I saw your eyes glisten like the ocean when the Sun at sunrise hits it. I fell in love with you 30 seconds after you told me I was "beautiful"

2. The first time we kissed I swore to God it felt like a dream. All my nightmares left me and I was somewhere over the horizon with clouds on my mind and you in my veins. I tasted you for the next several weeks, I never kissed your lips again after that first time.

3. I thought that once you see someone naked you see them extensively and into their soul. When I touched your paled skin I felt like an astronaut and explored your skin like Armstrong on the moon. I've never witnessed something so beautiful and lovely. But you were the  moon who never fully showed her face. I realized I should've listened in astronomy class.

4.  You wrote pieces inside my rib cage and opened a new chapter inside me. Helping me realize I wasn't halfway near to where I needed to be.

5. I fell in love with the idea of you.

5. I fell in love with the idea of you.

5. I fell in love with you.

6. It took me over a month to come to the conclusion that I loved you.

7. I still love you.

8. I don't know where you are, or how you've been. You severed our way of communicating and I am so so lost without you.

9. Time has a way of putting things in order, but what do I do if the hands on the clock have developed arthritis and I am still forgetting memories. I am losing my memory. Sometimes I recall half of one, and pick up the ending of another, what does it mean?

10. I still love you.

10. I miss you.

10. I think I miss you more than I love you.

I wanted to kiss your forehead and tell you it would all be okay so ******* bad
But it was cold and you were tired and wanted to sleep because you're a mess and I'm depressed and you don't look at me with galaxies in your eyes like I do you and I knew we'd never work
I should've just kissed your ******* forehead
I'm a wreck

Will you please break me free of these memories?
You were once a friend, but now you're just a bitter enemy.
We're two strangers that know each others secrets.
If you said you still love me, I wouldn't believe it.

And I've been standing in the rain for far too long.
My body has become weak, and my mind less strong.
I’m broken into pieces, from the hammer you grip.
Though I’ll still let the phrase "I miss you" slip through my lips.

I want the good memories gone
And the bad ones to stay.
So I never come back to you
I wanna remain far away.

Because you're an illusionist,
Who has mastered hypnosis,
You have many tricks up your sleeves
Along with dead roses.

"Daddy! Daddy listen to me count!"

One. I am the one. Your youngest descendant. I had no claim to your throne. I didn't want your crown.
Two. You had two other women besides my mother. Your beloved Queen, her closest lady in waiting, and my Mother, a peasant barely of age.
Three. In case you ever wonder a single mother has to work 3 jobs to afford an apartment, that smells like cigarettes and depression, and a diet of Ramen Noodles and freezer meals.
Four. "Mommy cries alot. I can't seem to figure out why. She told me I'm gonna be a big sister. I hope it's a boy."
Five. "Mommy never leaves my bed side at the hospital. We lost our house because Mommy had to quit her jobs. I don't like it here though. They poke me with needles and I'm losing my hair."
Five. "Mommy tells me it's okay that I can let go."
Five. "Grandma said an angel came in the night to make me better.
Five. I got called a boy in the bathroom today.

Five. I forget how to count when I'm emotional.

Five. I don't want to be bald.
Five... I mean...
Six. Your peasant found comfort in the arms of your best friend. His names Jim. He introduces her to Mary Jane, Molly and Aunt Hazel. When they're with her she forgets her two baby girls exist.
Seven. After 7 foster homes we ended up back with Mommy. She's more tired looking but they say she's clean. She still smells like our first apartment.
Eight. My innocent voice would carry the same heart breaking question to my worn out Mother's ears. "Why don't I have a Daddy like every body else."
Eight. The first time I was called a *******.
Eight. At 8 the bullying began.
Eight. Maybe I'd be better of dead.
Eight. He wasn't suppose to do that.
Eight. Mommy said it's wrong for a man to touch me like that.
Eight. Daddy why didn't you save me. You were suppose to protect me from all this.

Eight. Because you loved the feeling of the bottle pressed firm to your lips and the scorching of your throat, burning away any truth that could crawl it's way out your mouth more the 8 children you claimed and your ***** little secret.

Nine. I've seen you 9 times in my life. And each time you look worse. No teeth. Little hair. You've had 9 strokes in just a few short years.They say you spent to much time with Jack, Jim, and Jose. They don't know how you're alive.
Ten. I used to think you were a king. I used to tell myself you were busy running a country, fighting a war, doing anything noble. Instead of just leaving me.

10. I'm an adult now.
9. They say you accept the love you think you deserve.
8. Maybe that's why I fall for the jerks.
7. There's a boy. He likes your friends too.
6. I don't think I'm very happy anymore.
5. Sometimes I like to hang with Uncle Jim and Uncle Jack.
4. I can never have just one.
3. Each time it get's harder to say no to Mommy's girl friends.
2. I'm the daughter if two addicts.
1. "See Daddy I told you I could. I can count from 1 up to 10 and back down 1 again!"
"Sweetheart, that's a teddy bear not your.. your.. your..."
"I know Mommy I'm just pretending."

If I meant everything to you
why did I feel inadequate...

Once, I loved a man, who never once loved me.
I pined for him both day and night,
But he never once loved me.

He played his song for anyone,
For anyone but me,
And I pined for him both day and night
But he never once loved me.
.
His lips were moist, like ripened peach
And his arms were meant for me,

But he played his song both day and night
For anyone,

Anyone, but me.