He doesn't burn photographs
He doesn't join therapy sessions
He doesn't smoke too many cigarettes
Nor he drown himself into alcohol
He scratches his wounds daily
And never let them heal
He doesn't try to get rid of the pain
Instead he let it grow on him
He waters the seed of sorrow with his tears
He feeds it with the manure of old memories
He takes it to sleep with him
And nurtures it in himself
Till the moment when every single drop of his blood gets replaced by this pain
Until his fragile heart can bear no more
And his soul starts overflowing with emotions
That's when he dip his pen into this pain
And empty his heart on a piece of paper
He bares his soul for us to feel
He creates poetry that the world would cherish for centuries to come

They say love is weakness
They say that it only hurts you
They are right,
Love was my undoing.  
I fell in love with you,
But all you did was hurt me,
Over and over again.
You made me feel weak
You made me feel little
You made me feel insignificant
You don’t know how that feels,
To be vulnerable,
The the one you love,
Point out
Every
Single
Thing
They see wrong with you.
It hurt so bad,
And then I have no one there to help
Because you made me drive everyone away
Why can’t you see the pain in my eyes?
Why can’t you see through my front?
Why can’t you see my silent pleas for help?
You just keep going and going,
You haven’t ever stopped.
You’ve hurt me time and time again,
With both your words and your fists.
And I won’t stand for it anymore
Because of you,
I lost hope.
Hope in love,
Hope in the world,
And hope in myself.
You left me broken,
Exposed,
And weak.  
I learned one thing though,
Its that Love is hopeless,
And it DOES only hurt me.
So I have you to thank
For being the reason
I gave up all hope.

My name is Ashly (yes spelled without
the E)
I was born without a windpipe and was 3 months premature.
I underwent surgery for a tracheostomy and died on the operating table.
I was revived.
I was hooked up to many machines and my parents were told I wouldn’t live for more then 3 days...
If I would survive more then 3 days I would be hooked up to machines my whole life and be in a “vegetative state”
Doctors told my parents and family “I would never live to see my 18th birthday.”
I lived in the hospital for almost 2 years.
At age 2, I myself, ripped out my tracheostomy (which could have killed me)
My family rushed me to children’s hospital and the doctors decided to let the hole in my neck close and see what happens.
My doctors don’t know how I made it through the night or days after.
I went home after a couple weeks and that’s when I started living my life as a “normal” child.
All of my sisters were involved in dance classes, my parents( doctors didn’t agree) enrolled me in to classes.
        THATS WHERE MY LIFE CHANGED
Dance became my passion, along with gymnastics and musical theatre.
Something my family, doctors or even myself never thought I would EVER do.
On my 18th birthday it was a mixture of emotions.
I made a milestone that no one said I would ever see.
I competed in dance and gymnastics until I was 19 years of age as well as did over 60 musicals at my local theatre company.
I never thought I would ever have a boy love me because I had “too many problems” or even get married for that matter.
Fast forward, I am now almost 33 ( June .11th is my birthday)
Married for almost 8 years to my best friend.
Happy doesn’t even cover what I feel everyday waking up next to my love.
We may not have a “family” of our own but we are happy and in love over the moon with one another.

So why did I just ramble on with this?
Because I’m a MIRACLE and a SURVIVOR.
Even though I don’t remember much from my childhood and what I and my family had to endure, I have been fighter since my first breath.

I’M A SURVIVOR and I’VE MADE IT....

The remnants of yesterday still hang in the air
I put on my armor and pull up my hair
I unsheathe my knife, prep for the war
For what is a day without a new corpse?