Oh,
I'm not surprised,
You said your fine,
One too many times.

don't say you love me,
when you don't even know me,

on tuesday,
I will be attacked by fake I missed you's
and uncomfortable, unnecessary hugs,
because,
I can't miss strangers,
the same strangers that filled my living room this time last year,
the same strangers,
that give me things I dislike,
and have nothing to talk about with,
because they know nothing about me,
our conversation,
hangs in the constellations,
on the night you stopped by,
because no one looks hard enough to understand,
what they are,
you never,
care enough,
to understand who I am,

you repress your emotion,
like you clench nimble fingers,
into,
white hot,
pain,
I see it,
it drips,
from our name,

you claim you love me,
but I am not a fool,
I don't understand the love you claim,
for you use it like a tool,
thinking,
that seeing me,
once a year,
because of your,
own,
guilt,
of not knowing,
or caring,
about your little sister,
counts,
as a relationship.

April

Showers,

Bring,

May

Flowers.

My flowers,
Her flowers,

Gather a bouquet,
Of pretty little dead things,

May was the month,
I started living,

A birthday sure,
Would it be a day I regret?
I used to wonder,
Was it all in my head?

April showers,

Bring,

May,
Flowers,
This much is true,
But am I as much a flower to me,
As I am to you?

Counting my petals,
Love me,
Love me not,
I know I'm at an odd number this year,
As I watch my petals disappear....

Painful showers,

Can turn to,


Flowers.

Pull on my,
STARSUIT
Let the silvery fabric,
Engulf me,
Let your eyes swim in the patterns,
Night after night,
I capture your eyes,
Keep my gaze for,
As long as you can remember,
My,
STARSUIT,
Is sure to dazzle you,
Even if it isn't a dress,
Because a dress,
Would get caught in my satin tresses,
My obsessions,
Like the night,
Gleaming down my double breasted bow,
As my shiny black shoes walk over to you,
It's my STARSUIT,
Memorable,
Don't you see?
The way my body holds it,
Or,
It holds me,
It's my,
STARSUIT.

if you were right,
and i was wrong,
i swear to you,
i'd write a song,
before  our love,
went,
to ****,
just goes to show,
emotional,
is not the best to describe a fist..
no,
so here it goes,
i'll soften the blow,
just so you know,
i've let it go,
and i see your
smiling face once again,

but oh,
you let me cry it out,
you stayed up in your head to pout,
you claim the bruises on your brain,
were from me,
and not the rain,
that falls with tears,
i must admit it,
as it appears,


you still blame me.