I am your poet
when you need a light to shine through thr dark, clouded curtains
that you call your mind.

I cannot give you the sun or the moon,
I cannot offer you a thousand rings.
But I would write you endless amounts of sonnets
until you drown in my poetry.

My words will be yours,
Every letter will be written for you.
These lines will be your constant reminder
that you will always be enough.

But, it seems like you will read
but you will never know
that these poems that tore my skin
was all made for you.

This is all for you.

I could say that I only have eyes for you but I know one day all I will ever see is black and an empty side of the bed. But please know that I will still yearn to see your face. I would travel through hell and back just to find you.

I could say that you will always be in my mind but you mentioned the other day that you don't like being confined.

I could say that your hand fits perfectly in mine but lately, my cup of coffee provides more life than your fingers. But I would still hold a pen & write for you if it makes you less sad.

And I could say that you have my heart but yesterday you threw it on the ground then said, "Find someone else."

I have learned that I was not always right because all my life I told myself that I was unworthy and yesterday,  I overheard my friends talking about how I deserve the greatest things in life. I learned that it's not bad putting yourself in front of others. One day, I will live the imagination in my head today.  Sooner or later, someone will bring shivers down my spine and I will awaken the butterflies in their tummy. Someday, I will deserve someone. Someday, someone's going to love me more than I love them and they will give me back the things that I gave the undeserving in the past.

Does it really matter? Because time becomes ephemeral when you're spending it with romance. The way his fingers latched with mine was gone the minute he saw his friends. What is more important is the memories and the thought that you've lived long enough for you to meet him. What matters is the thought of him coming in as oxygen, intoxicating your system even though he left immediately as carbon dioxide, someone you don't recognize.

Your smoke has intoxicated me long since my dad stopped driving me to school. I am scorched by the touch of your atmosphere that I will never get used to. I can never take back the money I've spent on ***** ice cream and orange quail eggs. And despite your ridiculous amount of potholes and how every corner of you is corrupted, Manila, you are still my home.

I will forever treasure the nights I've spent walking through your pavement. The lights of you will never fail to fascinate me. How every monuments and art musuems becomes a portal from the past to the future. For all the laughs, tears, annoyance, and anger that I've had with you and the inside jokes that only we know. For the people I've met and will meet inside you. For all the streets I've walked and will walk onto. Despite your lack of snow and intense evidence of climate change,  Manila, I am still and will always be in love with you.

The wall that seperates our home
Was as thick as the callouses on my fingers,
But I could hear every brush stroke
That he made on his canvas.

With every flick of his wrist,
a new image begins to build.
With every breathe that he took,
breaths of love and passion.

I can see in high quality definition
The looks on the spectator's faces,
As they admire your colors
On the wall beside the colors you once admired.

Today I realized that no matter how many times you've rounded every kilometer of my brain, I have never entered yours. I've realized that you won't help me bandage my hand when it got burned when I reached for the stars that you wanted. I want you to swallow my poison for I have swallowed yours long ago and it's deteriorating me inside rapidly.