i want you to know
that i'm sad
but i'm afraid
you'll leave me
after seeing this
much wreckage.

i used to have
lungs for breathing
but now they're cathedrals
of the echoing air
i don't want to
breathe in any longer

i used to have
a heart that lived
but now is filled
with sand and poison
i wonder how
i could still feel
my heartbeat

so if you don't mean it

please
don't tell me you love me
don't admire the
hand painted ceilings
starting to peel off
because it's still "******* beautiful"

stop calling me beautiful at all.
stop seeing the ocean in my eyes.
stop kissing me as if
you feel resurrected everytime
i whisper your name on your lips.

and please
if you don't mean it
don't put your head on
my chest
and tell me
you've never heard
of anything more
magnificent and
a l i v e