Truth is.....

Since I was a child
a certain image has appeared in my mind
a guilty pleasure
a favorite pastime

Something so bitter yet sweet
a game of trick and treat
a forbidden fruit
I've always wanted to eat

It has never escaped me,
an original sin
that I've masked with many men
in my rainbow colored heart,

........Is where this secret has always been
from the very start.

When my eyes are weeds,
And my lips are petals, spinning
Down the wind that has beginning
Where the crumpled beeches start
In a fringe of salty reeds;
When my arms are elder-bushes,
And the rangy lilac pushes
Upward, upward through my heart;

Summer, do your worst!
Light your tinsel moon, and call on
Your performing stars to fall on
Headlong through your paper sky;
Nevermore shall I be cursed
By a flushed and amorous slattern,
With her dusty laces' pattern
Trailing, as she straggles by.

I often times imagine, as I
kiss him, what it would feel like,
to be pressing my lips tightly
against yours.

When I lay down at night
and close my eyes, I picture you,
laying next to me, and what your,
warm embrace might feel like.

I dream often about you,
sometimes we are in love,
other times I see you with her,
and I wake up heartbroken.

But then I realize, I am the
real heart-breaker here, and maybe,
it is just all exciting and new, and that is why,
it feels so good to feel this way.