You know what's sadder than writing anonymous poetry online.
Writing anonymous poetry alone,
in your room,
for yourself.
Although it is a close one.

There's so much u don't know about me still
Like did u know I wear reading glasses
Or that my parents both had the same last name even before they met
And I have a infatuation with tearing paper, and in my cupboard I have the largest collection of manually shredded paper imaginable
I've never really felt love
Or that once I fell asleep at the back of a bookstore for 4 hours
My mom tells me if she could do it again, she would abort me
And my father isn't even around to tell me what he thinks
But you're around
And I want you to know that I stayed up till 4 staring at the letter you gave me
And I still sleep with the lights on
And I bite my nails when I'm nervous
But I'm not nervous with you
And no, you don't know about the time I sang in the Christmas choir
Or that my favourite time of the day is early in the morning when it's not quite morning, but not quite night
But you could know
*And I would like to tell you

How much control u have over my ******* emotions
How if u choose to go get a snack before you reply
You will have me sitting on the edge of my bed wondering what I did wrong.

And how vulnerable I feel
Because I will spend an hour on my makeup if you tell me you will be there
And god forbid your late
I will spend hour in my dress you said you like, staring at my phone and wondering what happened.

Just how much I like you
Because I keep myself awake till 12
Because of that one time you messaged me asking if I'm up
And I was asleep and we could of talked for hours

But that was my fault
And this is your fault

95% of the time I feel absolutely nothing. But that 5%, god that 5%, I feel everything at once.

Stop going back to him my dear
He can't mend your bones
He won't treat you well my dear
He'll leave you all alone

Love isn't an excuse to get hurt my dear
Your mom was always right
Don't give him all you have my dear
You need to put up a fight

Don't let him yell at you my dear
It's not because your wrong
Does he really love you my dear?
Does he know your favourite song?

Stop going back to him
He can't mend your bones
He can't fix your heart
He'll leave you alone
You can't be fixed by the same person who broke you my dear

But you are not broken, my dear

You have got to wake up every morning at the crack of dawn,
Brew yourself a coffee,
Sit on your lawn chair,
And watch the first orange hued rays of sunrise kiss the dust-laden rubble

You’ve got to stop crying
Stop keeping yourself awake every night thinking about the same **** thing that wont matter 2 years from now,
You’ve got to stop depending on him to make you smile,
Talk to your friends and make yourself smile,

You’ve got to stop pitying yourself
And think, breathe and then go upstairs and get some sleep.
And kid you’ve got to love yourself
Because you’re beautiful
Because you’re worth it
Because no one else really will.