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Sitting
Thinking
My heart is sinking
Tracing fatal lines across my mind map
And I'm hitting a lot of potholes
because no one ever tends to these rough roads
If my poem stopped too soon
its because my page ran out of room...
when I get to the end I have so much trouble pushing onward
Lord I know you've got my back
When my dry ground begins to crack
*you send the rain
I know how to say
"I love you" in
English and French,
and Spanish and Italian,
and Russian and Bulgarian,
and Arabic and Dothraki
and High Valyrian,
and Klingon,
and in any other language
you ask,
I know how to
write "I love you"
in Gallifreyan and
Tengwar,
I know how to make up
a billion different poems
about my love for you.

But still, it won't make you
love me back. I somehow
was never enough for you.
You keep me awake every night
wondering why you left
and I think it's high time
I started looking up
how to say "I don't hate you",
"I've moved on", "I don't miss you"
and "I am okay" in all these
languages in which
"I love you" didn't matter.
At the crack of night, she swallowed her tears,
Been up through the hours, crying her heart out.
But as the shine of the moon casts an eery light,
Through the crevices of a broken house,
Her heart sinks low as the setting sun.

Drawing courage she thought she never had,
Takes a little peek through the curtains to the world outside.
No, nothing has changed, from the grey skies to the unlit streets at war.
The noise, the loud cries, the screams at night,
Somewhere, in this stagnant fear, a life fades into the dark.

She walks on shattered glass, an empty house, soul less, tears encompassed
Somewhere along the way, a few dreams meant to be buried away.
The mocking smiles of misery, beckoning, took all the light that prevailed.
All she remembers, that night, a shadow and closing walls,
She looks out the window, the days marked by  **The Fall.
Something dark, something to be feared, our future is bleak.
First step to solving a problem, is admitting there is one.
god always answers prayers not always in the time or package that fit into our lives but that is not his objective as Lord and God. it is to mentor and shape us into graceful beauty that overflows with love and joy which ignites a flame so infectious the dark has no choice, but to cede and surrender. his presence is that overwhelming and powerful but he wins with love and uses all that might to protect his children. he is the definition of love, amen.
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