Once upon a time
In a dream
There was just you and me

In the dream
You took my hand
And lead me away from everything else
So it was just you and I
It all happened so fast I though I was flying

We talked
We laughed
We danced
The perfect fairy tale romance

To bad it isn't real
To bad we've never had the chance

To dance under the stars
To feel that we could go far
To fall in love with each glance

Oh only
Just only
If we were given the chance

Lucky are those who have found love
and been loved.

Lucky are those who bear the gift of face.
   Easy is for them to find an easy case
            for their own taste
     - a goal for their own base.

Lucky are those who has an outstanding confidence.
For by it, they don’t live with a doubtful fence.
Freely as they get any wants in their existence.

I give away smiles, pieces of my lies,
        pretending not having rainy skies.
Hiding my Breathless sighs.

Sometimes I am like a rock
   too dull to feel, a surface too rough.
A sense I lost, an unreachable core,
I don’t know how to love anymore.



*© 2014 Pax

If you accidentally
             fall out of love,
Do you just dive
                back in head first?
           Feet first??
                     Eyes closed???
        Cannon ball????
             Or
Do you walk away
       Cause you can't swim
And you're scared to death
                   of *drowning?????

i'm jealous of the ones
who get to go back to someone who they consider to be their
everything, best friend, love, home
while I wait for that someone.
i've been waiting a while now.

I prefer being lonely
It means that nobody can pick on me
Or at least, say hurtful things
Within my hearing distance

"Being lonely
In a crowded room"
You've heard that expression,
Have you?
Well, it's so much more than that.
It's down to your core,
To your very soul.
Never having more
Than the thoughts you already know.
No hand to hold
No one there to hug
No voices around
Except the voices in your head
Laying alone in a big empty bed
Sleeping all the way on the edge
Saving room for...
The "one" you think will never show
No friends to call
Knowing no one will be there
Falling deeper and deeper
Into despair
"Lonely in a crowded room"
That's just the beginning
When your still lonely in your head
The voices stop
Your every thought is dark, death...
Let me just tell you..
You think you're lonely?
Think of that empty grave
No room to scoot to the edge
No crowds to even feel alone in...
I promise you
There's nothing more lonely
Than dead.




Think about it.
I've felt this way, I don't know how,
But I've managed to pull through
I'm sure that YOU...
Well, you can too.

I feel lonely.
And thats very hard to admit.
Though there's always people just out of reach, I am always seemingly lonely.
The people who I tell this to all promise they are there an never beyond my finger tips.
And yet I am lonely.
The wish to just sneak away an leave this world behind is always tucked in plain sight in my mind.
But The fear of those who would hurt there after is worse then the desired pain of the impact. The problem lies within the thought if I die. Are any of the problems solved? Am I any less alone,
Or have I just forced That pain onto the ones who clame to be Within grasp. But if they are to be So near. when I drop towards the ground arms wide ready to leave this all behind will they notice in time to hold out there arms and catch me.
Or will they only see the stain of a smile That once wore proudly across my face.
Not realising in time that it had faded to nothing but a memory I was unable to pry back from my soul.
Would they unknowingly stand by as I didn't dare cry. But hold my head high as I bid goodbye, would I no longer feel lonely if I was in heaven with you.

Will I ever find someone as good as you?

Lost inside my thoughts and
Overthinking everything
Never say what's on my mind because
Even when I speak I'm not heard.
Looking for a way to be okay. When
You see me you wouldn't suspect
                        how lonely I really feel.