Your eyes.
Your laugh.
Your smile.
Oh, how I miss it all!

Is it selfish-
     to want you all to myself?
Even if you were never truly mine... but I was *always yours?

I'm in love with a certain type of mess.
The idea of living your life on the run for the fun of it yet you are securely stable.
Weird enough that I am still drowning myself in my own insecurities.

*Oh, what a mess I am!

There. You saw me- my weaknesses, my strengths, my vulnerabilities.

My love, you are no longer "my love".
You kicked me out of the door
After all these years of me giving love to you.
Thanks, I needed the exit long ago.

My love that's no longer my love,
You never went out of your way for me
and I always covered you for it all these years.

You know what I could do
But I choose not to
Because I will NEVER stoop down to your level.

Thank you.
Thank you for the memories.
Thank you for the lessons.
Thank you for for raising my standards.

I will never settle for anything less than what I deserve.

Candle lit room
Illuminated by moon light
A faint smile from the unknown lady of the night

I found her wandering in the boulevard
She's smiling for a person with unsatisfied carnal desires

She undresses and starts spreading sheets above us
Faint scent of her hair
A beauty, no doubt

I listened to her stories with a lit cigarette
How she used to be an honor student

She undresses me and kisses me
She knows where to lead her mouth and hands
She moves- making me quiver with her damp thighs

I will never know your name.
Only the shared cigarette and your story

She slides it in- Moaning, scraping, pulling, tugging.
I lost myself in ecstasy falling in my vivid dreams in the hedonist dimension of the universe.

*She grabbed my wallet and ran.
She opened it; and saw a picture of herself in my arms as a toddler.

I caught lightning in your bottle,
and I swallowed it whole.
So torrid and treacherously lit,
I became the kind of something
you taught yourself to run from.
Skin tight and white hot,
I radiate light from all angles;
buzzing with fluorescence.
With my fingertips brightening
the curves of your lips,
I trace that familiar fine line
between your fear and fascination.

In a single crack across the sky,
I will set your darkness ablaze
and leave you with
a deafening boom of clarity.
Jolted and stunned, you take in
an infinite illumination,
devouring every inch of
the unknown color and wonder
once shadowed by your thick,
murky doubt.

Blink, and it disappears
as quickly as it came to be.
What you see, you can’t forget.
As the spots dance, staccato
in front of your eyes,
you run, just as you taught yourself,
fast and far, away from the light;
disenchanted once again,
as you recall the fact that
lightning never strikes
the same place twice.
the same place twice.