Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
Doy A Jul 2020
--
There are so many words to describe me,
none of them is B.A.M.E.
I've got a foreign name, exotic.
Try to read it before you modify it.

How long have I lived in the UK because
my English is so good, where did I learn it?
My accent is American, it's confusing.
or my accent is too Filipino, quite embarrassing.
How can we come from so far
and be so fluent-- so bizzarre.

My rice cooker is an enigma,
more so the amount of rice I eat, huh?
My spoon and fork don't make any sense to you
But your table knife achieves nothing for me, too.

Why do we dye our perfect black hair?
why do we want our skin to be fair--
why don't we just embrace our God-given tan?
Your president seems like a smart man
Fighting your country's drug war like no one else can
Lastly, "are you a Manny Pacquiao fan?"

It's quite difficult to be a P.O.C.
in a world that doesn't understand our P.O.V.
Why we've immigrated and not always assimilated
Why we've flown thousand of miles away from home
Only to stick with our own
but sometimes there is just some comfort
in not having to explain the way we are
or who we are
and why we are
the persons we are
without having to feel subpar.
Doy A Jul 2020
I wasn't sure what my life was for until you came along and made me understand what it means to live fully and love unconditionally.

To my daughter,
I'll carry you
for as long as my arms could bear the weight of you
and your beauty
and your wonder
and your burdens
and your flaws
and your joys
and your tears

and I will be here
as your mother
and friend
and teacher
and confidante
and your safety
and your home.

I love you. I love you immensely.
I love you with the new life you gave me.
Doy A Jul 2020
I would like to take your heart and coddle it.
I would like to hold you close.
Your tears should only serve to water the flowers that grow from your soul.
I'm sorry that it's so difficult,
this life you have to survive--
but I promise you,
better days are coming.
So please,
don't ever tire of shining.
Doy A Feb 2020
done with the violence
done with the pain
done with the same shame
over and
over and over
again

done with the accusations
and the suspicions
done with the same lies
in different forms
and messed up versions

today you said you're sorry
you said you love me
you always will
but who knew a love like this
could somehow ****
the passion
the trust
the ways that I
thought I knew you
were loving me the same way
I did
with my whole heart and
my whole life

my whole life
is unrecognisable and I
can barely tell which truth to believe in
because how can you ever deceive
someone who stopped their heart beating
for you
how can you destroy someone who
took you in their arms and
went ahead and said,
"stay here, you belong in the home
inside my heart
I built only for you."

done with late night crying
finding myself imagining dying
as a way out, an escape
done with blaming you or me
for the choices I keep on making
done punishing
myself for the mistakes
that you made
because I made the same mistakes too
as if the path to forgiveness is repeating
the ways we've hurt each other hoping
it will just stop to hurt
at some point

it's like you and I
Or mostly I
have to tiptoe around landmines
Afraid I'll discover more crimes
afraid I'll be in the wrong place at the wrong time and
careful I don't set off the time bomb
that is called Our Relationship

when heartbroken poets make metaphors
about wounds and battle scars
I wonder where mine are
because I've been through this same war
fought it and won it and lost it
for years and years on repeat
and yet I have no marks to prove it
so maybe not every victory is a celebration
and not every survival is the ending of the story
and not every abuse leaves a bruise
and here I am still writing
wondering about my own story's ending
Doy A Dec 2018
when darkness comes and i can not sleep
my mind lingers
and brings me to
you
only you
always you
Insomnia
Doy A Dec 2018
how can i find the closure i so desperately seek
when the only answers i need
are buried 6 feet under

how can i utter
the apologies i never said
when the person I've wronged
is no longer living

how do i move on
from memories that haunt me
when the reason I'm still breathing
is because the same person once told me

"Look at the silver lining, ******. You'll be okay."
i will never forget you
  Dec 2017 Doy A
Star BG
Words words words
like little droplets
fall from mind.

They tickle senses
awakening visions.

They travel from Mind to Breath,
Breath to Hand
Hand to Pen.

They fall
making puddle of verse
for reader to splash in
as water proof ink drifts in wind.

Words need no umbrella,
for their cool coat of moisture
empowers the scribe.

And brings a rainbow of beauty
for all to see.
Inspired by Doy Thanks
Next page