High atop the spire beneath a cloudless sky
the Cross stands forlorn Christmas is nigh
since long in the past time beyond recall
no bells chime here sung no carol!

But still its heart flutters as it hears the Lord's voice
I carried your burden and set for you the choice
to do this world much good and love your fellow men
be happy in others' happiness take share of their pain!

Kind Lord mutters the Cross men still live for gain
act the way it seems your blood was shed in vain
they war and breed hatred between them raise wall
hanker for pelf and power in their loss they squall!

The church lies abandoned starkly white and bare
only the Cross bows to the Lord in silent prayer
still hoping it's not far away when the bells would ring
the Lord would carry the Cross on his second coming!

Staring into the distance through a misty window,
hours maybe days, a timeless moment,
I thought I could see her face,
somewhere out in the rain soaked darkness
how much longer must she make me wait?
tip toeing through the whispers and shadows
drowning in these memories and tears.

The shimmering light has died
         The image of you slowly
                    fades out
I will cry,
       I am crying,
                I have cried.
The darkness consumes the doubt
                The hail Mary,
        the pass over the line
    It's too much,
             I can no longer reach out
This knife is too pretty
         and *I'm not fine

Chauncey was a gardener
At least that’s what was said
His roses were his masterpiece
A perfect shade of red
Petals always perfect
Satin was their feel
Appearing artificial
Though every one was real
Every day he tended
The weeds he’d bend and pick
His plants they stood so straight and tall
Aided by a stick
Bound with fabric wire
Green about the stem
He would gaze for hours
He was so proud of them
Surrounded by such beauty
Still something was amiss
He loved his precious flowers
On a wondrous day like this
But in his heart was lacking
The affection he required
He was a lonely gardener
Now growing in desire
Until the fateful morning
When up his path she walked
Captured by her smile
He could hardly talk
A very special woman
Had come into his life
He was very certain
He’d make this girl his wife
His heart was filled with happiness
Beneath the skies above
For Chauncey was a gardener
And Chauncey was in love
Her beauty was so precious
From her head down to her toes
When he looked into her eyes
He saw the perfect rose
Every day was special
In all that they would do
She told him that she loved him
He said, “I love you too.”
His heart was steady beating
His smile grew so wide
As if a wondrous garden
Was blooming deep inside
The fragrance overwhelming
The colors bright and new
He found it hard believing
That all of this was true
There was one little problem
They lived so far apart
The missing, it was growing
Tearing at her heart
She promised she would love him
Until her dying day
But it was getting harder
He lived so far away
Then he received a letter
From the one he did adore
She told him she was sorry
But she needed so much more
He pleaded “reconsider”
He loved her oh so much
She said that she believed him
But missed his loving touch
Dark clouds started forming
So black upon the sky
He found that he was all alone
His garden it had died
He looked on wilted blossoms
Fading quick to brown
Nothing much was beautiful
Growing from the ground
Weeds as tall as buildings
Thorns to rip his skin
He locked up tight the garden gate
He’d never tend again
He sat beneath an oak tree
For months it seemed to be
When sprouting from the soil
A spot of green to see
He watched as it was growing
It seemed to call his name
It wrapped around his ankles
Out in the pouring rain
When a shadow formed behind him
The sun began to glow
A figure was approaching
Someone he did know
Closer it was moving
There before his eyes
The plant that wrapped around him
He suddenly realized
She had come to find him
Her heart broken in two
She told him that she loved him
He said, “I love you too”
She said that she was sorry
But she was just afraid
Fear of getting hurt again
The decisions she had made
He promised he would love her
Forever and a day
She did not need to worry
He would not go away
He wants to only love her
And make her life complete
Her love was oh so perfect
His lonely heart did meet
And then just like a miracle
Because his love she’d chose
Out there in his garden
Bloomed a perfect rose
Sparrows started singing
The skies a lovely blue
He told her that he loved her
She said, “I love you too”

your fingers planted seeds everywhere you touched me
you watered them by whispering into my ears
and flowers sprouted from my spine each time you kissed me

Why did you have to pull me in like this?
Why couldn't you be like every other girl?
Benign? Impermanent?

You were untraditional, unorthodox,
You became air where there was none,
Water where there was only dust

And then you told me that you were sick,
And nothing brings two people in like illness,
All of a sudden everything changed

I've never felt like much of a father figure,
But ******* you made me care like one,
Probably why it's still so agonizing

And I'm still tasked with laughable ideas
Like "letting go" and "moving on"
And I know that there's no alternative

There is no room for me in your life,
You've set sail for new waters,
And I'm simply left to drown

A mere three poems you have posted
and I sense something like beauty
in your lines
Something exactly like beauty
A hint of pain,
but every indication of self-betterment
through self-reflection
and direct (non-)action
as you feel the edge
but do not press it through
which I hope you continue not to do
And although I have never
drawn my own blood
I find myself touching things
just to see how they feel;
my intent, to escape anything real

So I imagine you experience life
in a similar way
Small escapes whenever you can,
but questioning whether something's
wrong with your head
And the agony of loss;
your cells certainly remain
And your mention of tampons
brings to mind for me
that my last love's last remaining
evidence of our time
is a ****** wrapper that stayed
in my trash for months,
even survived a move
and now rests in a big bag
ready to go out.
Surely, you are still with him
somewhere in his life.

You are not disgusting,
of that I am sure
We all have our secrets
And those of us who hide them all
are the disgusting,
because you find them out
when it hurts the most

And as I bring this piece to a close,
I see you have revealed two more of your own,
further revealing your heart and its beauty,
as you give to a man who has a heart like my own