Freedom reigns where ever we are
It's the reason our warriors fight
Upon their return, show them support
So they know what they fought for was right

From Montezuma to Bataan
and the shores off of Japan
Show each woman, show each man
They were there for us at home

From the jungles of Vietnam
to Iraq and Afghanistan
Show each woman, show each man
they were not out there alone

When they come on home
Show them what is in your heart
Show the pride you have in them
the pride you had right from the start

Welcome them as heroes
To the land they left to fight
Let them sleep in freedoms home
A peaceful rest in the dark night

No matter where they battled
Show them exactly how you feel
Support them in their troubles
Let them know your love is real

Be there to share their stories
Say thanks to them with pride
Welcome them as heroes
They'll feel ten feet tall inside

From Montezuma to Bataan
And the shores off of Japan
Show each woman, show each man
They were there for us at home

From the jungles of Vietnam
To Iraq and Afghanistan
Show each woman, show each man
They were not out there alone.

There are five stages to grieving
I've been through them all
At least twice, some three times
I'm 45 and single
Very single
Husband...cancer
Daughter...war
No dog, no cat
single
You know, I'm the only person I know
who lost a daughter in the war
Was I mad, really spitting mad
I can still see that poor fellow
The one who delivered the news to me
Not his fault, but....I think I tore enough
skin off of him to last a thousand lifetimes
There was denial, she's not gone I thought
She'll come through the door one day
She'll phone, but it hasn't rung yet
And if it does....Houdini can't be far behind
I miss her, truly miss her
I've come to terms with it
It wasn't easy, but I understand now
I've moved on, and she has too
This year, I had to relive it all over again
I do, anyway....every time  I hear we lost someone else
someone else's child, their son, daughter, husband, wife
father, mother, someone who was loved
This year, the fifth anniversary year of all years
I've been asked to go to the ceremony down town
They want me to be the Silver Cross Mother
Not nationally mind you,
But here, in my town
The town my daughter grew up in
They want me to show my grief
In front of all of them
Again
Now, I'm mad again
Not at them for asking
But, at war,
It stole my daughter
It took away my chance at watching her grow
Grandkids, school plays
selfish reasons, I know,
But, I hate it
I'll do it, **** right I will
She deserves it
They all do, each and every one
And when I do,
Not only will I be there for her
I'll be there laying that silly fluffed up
plastic coated ivy and poppy wreath
for all 158 mothers who have lost children
In this war at least
And for the ones to come
Which I hope is few
And most important
I will show them another
New stage of grieving
PRIDE
Pride in myself
Pride in my daughter
and Pride in my Country
The sixth stage of grief
From the heart
I'm Arlene Watson
And I lost a daughter
And I'm mad
And I'm proud
and on November 11th
you'll see both
I miss you dear....

Today will conquer many lives
without reason
For the sake of remembrance
I will breathe in each tender second
with a stronghold in my chest
grateful to live
another wake up
A blink longer than those less fortunate

May I conquer today
with all of the reason
To remember those
who have now become
small bits of gold in our history
A bold outline of a life once lived
I raise my wine filled heart
to those who are no longer here

A month ago I sat in class
in a New England School for boys
Now, I'm in a bomber group
Adjusting to the noise

I made plans for Harvard
A doctor, I would be
Then my life would turn
In a way I didn't see

The war was on in Europe
We saw in the press
But, 18 days before Christmas
we were pulled into the mess

Future plans were put aside
Our country we'd support
We'd forget all of our future thoughts
We'd join, though not for sport

We signed up down in Boston
Young men flyers, soldiers all
Preparing for a battle
Many would not live till fall

We thought not of our future
Our present, all we had
Many dead by Christmas next
The thought is truly sad

You do not what you want to
But, what needs to be done
You go from boy to man so fast
You've barely walked...now run

Think back on those who made it
Remember who did not
Young men they are forever
They deserve a longer thought

The air is pure and holy
It is scattered with young souls
Boys, now men who went to war
And put aside their goals

we see the smoke
and hear the drums -

it gets old - the news
of war - no more glory

-  the dead are dying
old and young

- we see the smoke
and hear the drums -

living in our rooms
above the fray -

we turn away
like yesterday -

we see the smoke
and hear the drums -

another day.

r ~ 10/17/14

In the
uphill
struggle
of a soul...

..if
I have ever done ill,
it is only because
I have been ill.

You greeted me with your smile.
You greeted me with your kindness.

I started to really fall for you.

You blinded me with your love.
You blinded me with your care.

I started to really love you.

You pushed me on the bed.
You pushed me against the wall.

I started to really resent you.

You broke my arm once.
You broke my heart many times.

I started to really hurt inside.

You cut me with your words.
You cut me with your fist.

I don't want to bleed no more.

I want to stop this pain.
I want to stop these demons.
I want to stop this insanity
I want to stop this suffering
I want to this to STOP ..................... PLEASE!!

My feet are flat, my eyes are bad

It hurts for me to run

"you've checked out fine" the doctor said

"You're in the Army, son!"

It makes no sense

They can't be right

I've even brought a note

"Stop staring son, and shut your mouth"

"'before I cut your throat"!

"But, Captain....sir"

"I'm all 4F"

"There's no way you'll want me"

"Put your arm down, boy, stop salutin'"

"I'm a Sargeant, don't you see?"

"I'm an NCO, a working man"

"Not a pencil pushing geek"

"I own your life, you're mine now boy"

"You long haired, hippy freak"

"I've got ten weeks, to shape you up"

"I'll teach you how to fight"

"Now grab your gear and follow close"

"And don't lose my tail lights"

"Welcome to the forces folks,"

"Now repeat after me"

"I joined up of my own free will"

"I'm here voluntarily"

"Select your bunk and grab some sleep"

"Your new life starts at dawn

"Forget about the world you know"

"Now, all of that is gone."

I hit the bunk and closed my eyes

And was just falling asleep

When in the room I heard a noise

"Wake up, you  long haired creeps!"

I jumped on up, as did we all

Saluting was our mission

"Drop your arms you maggots..now"

and assume the position"

"Push-ups lads, that's how you'll grow

"to respect just why you're here"

"Right now, though I don't smell courage boys"

"Right now, I just smell fear"

It took us almost half the day

To do ten that were right

If this alone would do me in

I'd be dead before tonight.

I'm twenty seven years old
Not, old by any standard
But, in my world...I'm seven
Seven years removed from an IED
Seven years away from the day that changed me
Seven years into my new life
We were on a routine mission
If you can call anything in Khandahar
routine
Convoy escort, some press folks
A country singer and his band
And us....always us
We were Military Police
Bringing 'em in, taking 'em home
there we were,
Same trip, same road
same barren landscape
same potholes
same, same, same
Until November 4th, 2005
Nothing has been the same since then
I'm a Sargeant, Military Police
William Blankenship
Fort Hood, Texas...just a kid...until
We were on Operation Squire
routine....all routine
The first humvee hit an IED
flipped right in front of us
the bus of civilians, stopped
radio chatter like mad
Rocket fire took out the Stryker LAV
Blew it to bits
No survivors
We were pinned down
We didn't return fire
Couldn't....didn't know where to
And had to get the civilians to safety
We were only 2 miles from base
LAVs were on the road immediately
I don't remember much about it
Just, that it was routine
Started with the headaches
took about a month
Then, the nightmares
Sent me back home to get over it
To a Veterans Hospital in Texas
Still saw the humvee flip
Heard the screams
Saw the fire, and watched the explosion behind
And I wasn't sleeping anymore
Couldn't handle bright lights for a time
Still can't, but not as bad
Doctors said it was PTSD
I said, "you think?"
What else could it be
Two years they kept me in there
Two years I saw them die
Then...they hooked me up with a service dog
New program they said
He'd keep me relaxed
I couldn't take care of myself
And now, they want me to have a dog
I said, I'd try it...but no guarantees
Said his name was Squire
funny....I knew that name from somewhere
But, couldn't remember where
Big, oafish, Newf he was
Like a small fridge with hair
And big, brown eyes
Squire....
First day he just sat and looked at me
Waited until I started to move
And he moved with me
Came over, and pushed his head under my hand
It's been that way ever since
I move, he moves
I eat, he eats three times as much
We bonded pretty quick
I still get the dreams,
but, Squire knows and he's there
Under my hand, calming me down
That's all he does, calms me down
He doesn't take away the dreams
But, he helps
I don't know how
But, he helps
They still die, and I still scream
But, not as often
Just routine....