You said all the right things.
Oh, how I believed each honeyed word.
But you never meant the them did you?
I tried my best to make you smile,
But when things got hard you left me.
I gave my all,
And now im taking the fall.
You never had those wings.
You werent an angel at all,
But a spinner of lovely things.

They say I'm good, they say I'm fine.
I'm meeting all the appropriate lines but I go to work, I feel slow
And I come home to feel all alone
When I speak its hot but not
They say it is and then its not.
I'm too close im too far
Where can I find the middle land
If I can even stand
I feel like im too much
i just need someone too clutch
I don't need help im not a child
But I just wish someone would be by my side
When im alone the world is dark
Spinning in my head
I feel like my heart has turned to lead
I give and give
At least thats how I try to live
But I feel like its not enough
And my emotions I try to *****
Im suffocating in my own skin
I hurt in silence its the best
Better than pushing my pain on the rest
Ill keep trying
And ill keep slipping

Is it all in my head am I a fool?
No im alone and sad in my room.
There are those who'll say they'll stay
Then they don't and I just lay
But its alright they say im fine
Apparently im meeting all the appropriate lines

Promises don't mean jack ****.
Words have become meaningless.
Words are pretty - words are fine
But they aren't going to be there at night when I cry.
All the trust I put into his  words rattles to the floor because they had no support. **** him **** his promises
All his comforting whispers
**** the nights he called me baby
I let him call me his
**** the nights I let him hold me
**** the nights I trusted him to touch me
**** me for being so stupid
So silly so naive
I listened to his *******
I drowned in his eyes and the falsehoods they told.
I should've stayed strong
Shouldn't have let him into my heart
How could I let him reel me in just to cast me out
I was too shallow.
I allowed jealousy to get to me.
I wanted ownership
I wanted love
I wanted rights
So I broke my one rule
**** it
**** him and his promises
I will be my own again
I was strong before he came.
He does not define me
I do
I control my future

When the sun says goodnight
And the moon says good morning,
The crickets wake to begin a new story.
The morning is done so a night can begin.
The sweet night air cools the skin.
With a lingering touch
She crawls into your bones.
Her sudden sting will not last,
After our souls are numbed with a soft lullaby.
A sudden fatigue will grab at your heart,
And you'll lose the self
you never thought about.

When minds constrict
And inspirations lost,
The canvas blank
And hands seem idle,
Though thoughts seem gone
Do not secede the struggle.
The next gleaming rainbow will form
And the drop of dew that clings to a blade of grass will be born.

Surrounded by my brothers
And yet I am alone
We grew together, weather storms
And cuddled amongst parched leaves
We are strewn across the fields
And forgotten till our day of glory

A sense of knowing
But no word crawls out our lips
Of the impending doom
Our beautiful ending
It is a painful thorn
And after our disastrous use
We are baked into a mockery of shame

Coming from a single seed
We are born together
yet die apart in unison
Surrounded by my brothers
At least until our end

Resting, resting in puddle
The grains relaxed
splayed across one another
The sand is peaceful
It is undesturbed
The worlds chaos passing it by
Watching the world as through a glass
its where it belongs
No pretenses - no emotion
Just stillness as the sand melts content in a puddle
as not a participant but an observer
Life passes by

My insides burn, turn and broil. I feel as if I could burst. I want to do everything. And yet nothing excites me. Im worn from a long day but try as I might sleep doesn't come. Worries of the world stir through my head. I ache, I hurt, I yearn to sleep yet she still doesnt come.
Hunger twists my stomach yet no food fits my mood or apatite. Colors are bright yet bring me no delight or interest. The night wears on and yet I am still not gone. Sleep is the cool water on a burn, the mute on a loud static. The pause, the peace. Sleep is the calm in a life of chaos. Why does she now evade me.
A yawn escapes my lips. Please come. End the pain and suffering of the day. Take it away so in the new day I can wake calm and prepared ( and a little grouchy). I've lost all ability to think and yet I still can't sleep. Another yawn, one step close to the rest, the goodbye to the colors and hello to the hollow darkness where thought carries its own weight and no longer weighs down my head.

Sun licked grass tickles my toes
And its my time.
Time to be free in the sky
Time to knit the world into my own pattern
To discover the dips and turns in my skin
To become the wonder I am
I'm neither heaven nor hell
I'll be the beauty in between