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 Dec 2014 Ashley
Makenzie Marie
I'm in
A constant state
of discomfort;
of pain.
Sickness
in my heart
and in my brain.
But people call me strong
anyhow.
They see what I try to
somehow.
The fraile
     fragile
     falling apart
state of my heart
is invisible to them.
So slowly
        and eventually
I'm beginning to see it,
or I'm just starting to believe it.
The strength in me
that everyone sees,
is everything I'm trying to be.
So I can only assume
that in some way I'm succeeding.
 Dec 2014 Ashley
Emma Henderson
I can't remember when you left,
It seems you were always leaving,
into the night, behind feathered trees,
and when the rain hit you,
you pretended you didn't feel anything

"I don't want to talk about my dad," you'd say
That unholy narcissist left bruises on you,
that you hid from us all

I wish you'd said your mother was a villain ,
who tried to send you to heaven,
but only succeeded in making you bleed;
a memory that resurfaced,
as the devil's stigmata,
on your wrists

You're the girl in a coma,
and have been since I met you,
who fell in love with her doctor,
the day she almost died

Her am I wondering,
are you alive?
Or are you a ghost,
haunting Christ Church,
continuing to do the only thing
that made you happy

I'm sorry you're gone,
your phone ringing out,
your profile a tombstone

I wish I could go,
go to your home
and ring your doorbell
without the fear of being told,

The girl in a coma has left,
not behind the trees,
into the dark,
but to the place her mother tried to send her,
not long after she took her first breath
She needs things
neat and proper
neat and proper
Why he wonders?
from behind his ears
He hears
a small voice whisper
She does what she does
to feel better
to feel something
to escape the fears
she's haunting
because she does in fact,
feel nothing
and has grown comfortable of that fact.
she needs to stop searching
she needs to clean up her act
its fractured
its broken
get over it
 Dec 2014 Ashley
Ellie Geneve
They say that a girl's biggest lie is "I'm fine",
but I don't care what they say.
I'm fine.
 Dec 2014 Ashley
cr
everything is strange and eerily quiet
and i am not allowed the delicacy
of feeling sad
and i am not allowed
to feel anything
i am hiding bad habits underneath
makeup and there are blooming
bruises on my arms and
she is so beautiful but she's dousing me in kerosene
nights and lighting matches for her cigarettes on top of me
but i - i - i am not allowed to feel this
i am not allowed to feel this
sixteen years is not enough, it's
never going to enough, i am
never going to be
enough

there's no relief in death
but there's some sweet ecstasy within it
which i've been literally dying to try.
god i can't do this anymore
 Dec 2014 Ashley
Xander King
For our anniversary
you gave me a rope necklace
Then got angry when i started
chocking on
my
words.
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