perhaps i make
too many metaphors
about the ocean.

but i can't help
but compare you to a wave,

for each time i've almost got you,
you recede back to whence you came,

into the tide.

(a.m.)

As quickly as the ocean's waves turn themselves in
And as nimble as the ballerina making her final spin

As timely as the spring flowers come to life
And as melancholy as tonight

As agile as the lion's prey
And as doomed as the words I could never say

I love you, I love you
With as much blood as my heart can take
With as much breath as my lungs can contain
and let go.
Infinite.

I love you, I love you
With as much width as these tiny hands can hold,
With as much as steps these feet can muster
Limitless.

I love you, I love you
With as much time as this universe has.
*Boundless.

Call me insignificant but I’ve been chasing undeveloped photographs
Down these old hallways that we used to call home when the sun didn’t look right
Locked away in closets with my heart stuck under your skin
The same old words buried under your fingernails
Sometimes I struggle to find the difference between hospital rooms and a bed for the night
And I’ve never seen the point of living by the hands of the man-made god that hangs on the wall
But the difference between then and now was that I always saw you in the dark
I traded your broken grimace for her smile and I swear to God I will never regret it
Because she speaks the same words with her mouth sewn shut
And I guess thats something you could never understand
*~W.C.

Some people define growing up as growing into you place in the world,
but its not.

It's the first time
You realize he is not yours anymore.
It's the first time you notice your parents are not your heroes.
Its not about your first kiss but your last.
And even worse, you realize there really is no milk in Oreo's.

It's not falling in love for the first time
but falling down and watching your bruises
avoiding to touch them because with every touch
you cant help but remember that this skin was once pink
but you have no idea how it got so blue.

Sixteen is wondering if it had to be this way and leaving the room
to avoid listening to the static of broken people
that have forgotten how to channel forgiveness.

you keep growing extending your roots in cynical fields,
producing fruit that would **** you.
You build walls around your legs when someone tries to move you.
you plant your feet into cement to make sure you don't lose yourself.

You wake up to the thought that he is making someone else breakfast
and you feed on the last words he said to you three years ago.
You realize that you are breathing in the same air he is breathing out
and maybe that is something you could live without.

You turn off the lights, and you turn off your mind.
And you dream. you dream about the lies of staying young.
Waking up to him, laughing and loving but wait,
what if growing up really meant;

Falling in love with yourself first.
Painting your golden hair on a mirror just the way it is
because you have grown just as beautifully as all of those glimmering strands.

If someone tries to cut your hair, smile.
Because maybe growing up means
taking a step back to grow some more,
so fix your old split ends.

Maybe growing up means
you are the only one that can turn the light on.
maybe those bruises
are just reminders that you got up and bumped something in the dark
because you finally figured out that there is a ******* light switch.

It's the first time you discover that there are people in places
with souls filled with empty spaces, just like you.
And maybe your heroes have to grow up too.

Maybe growing up
is putting down the phone.
Not because it would hurt you less
but because now you know that
your ex lover is not going to pick up the phone.
but it will always be the voice of someone you have never known.
on the other end "hello".
"who am i speaking to?".

Instead open a door,
and let the essence of your home spill out.
Because just know it's only time until
the fragrance of who you are draws in
someone tall, and someone grown,
someone who is not afraid to be known.

someone who knows that they don't belong in the empty spaces
of someone else's heart, they shouldn't be there in the first place.
But in mirrors, in the reflection of their own eyes.
So don't breath too deeply because you might find it
too hard to find yourself in the fog you left on your mirror.

Growing up is not
turning off all the lights because you are scared of what you see
but being strong enough to know that pain exist's so you can move forward.
It's not looking into someone else's eyes to see yourself,
but looking into someone else's eyes to make sure they see you.

Growing up is realizing that
even though he made your heart beat it's fastest when you didn't want it beating at all
it was still you that carried you heart in your treasure chest to make that possible.

What is the use of dipping your finger tips into someones heart
before you have melted your skin into the oceans of the world?
why would you lose yourself in someones eyes when you could
float in between the waters horizon and the dawn of the atmosphere?

Can you love someone when the soles of your shoes have been worn to voids
or do you have to wait for your human soul to be stripped of every meaning as well?

Because I have been running endlessly to catch a glimpse of your life
and its broken my heart and torn my shoes.

life is too long to spend your days asleep and then pretending you
blinked to find yourself lonely in routine.

And that is why I do not waste a second walking to the parking lot to
get your wallet. Instead I run.
Because i can travel the world and i can grab
the soil of a thousand different mahogany lands
but I will always find my hands
guiding themselves through the dark back to your body.

life is too long to spend your days asleep and then pretending you
blinked to find yourself lost in a future that came to soon.

And that is why I spend no time asleep. Instead of watching the sunrise
I watch you begin to wake up because because the sun does not rise
until you smile for the first time at 8 thirty AM.

The only travel I need is that of the vibrations of your laugh sailing from
your lips only to vanish into the memories I have kept so well in my mind.
The winds of the world could never whisper
sweeter things than you could on a drunken,
sleep deprived night.

I do not have to wait for the night time so I can wish on stars with you.
Partially because I have nothing to wish for,
as every lover would say.
but mostly because if I connected your freckles to your goosebumps
I would have the entire constellation mapped out on your body.
And unlike stars Your love doesn't fall.

I do not need astrologers to look deeply into the sky to let me know
that you are the one.
Because I am a palm reader and when your hand is embedded in mine
the only thing i know is that you are my entire world.

Fate will make our paths cross
But is it what I want? My future is someone else's, and soon it will be yours.

People say we are for each other, but is it truly so? A companionable silence will follow but nothing will grow. They say time will bring us love
I think not. Acceptance will grow but not of love

Love eludes me in this destiny, this cage I'm trapped in
My choices are yours, your choices are others
We are what they define us to be.
Love for us - It's nothing but an illusion
The only love we will ever have is to forever be
In love
With the idea of love.

Love is not saying three words for reassurance nor is it insecurity.
It is the stable breathing of the person next to you
and the increasing certainty of being loved back
with every change of season.

Being in love destroys the phrase "I love you"
making words astoundingly meaningless.
How could the English language,or any language,
mean the slightest when compared to  
the soft pecks on your cheek, the comfortably long eye contact
or the warmth of his presence.  
The man constructed form of communication can thread together
a seemingly endless string of lies, but the heart doesn't know
how to suppress what it feels let alone lie.

The heart feels and loudly expresses what it knows
in the form of piercing waves every time his hand
brushes the hair out of your face.
The only reassurance in love is the kind that is provided
by the heart, triggered by his cold finger tips gliding on your skin.
Its love that awakens you to feel and listen.

Love is heard loudest in silent rooms
where the heart beats to the rhythm of the mind.
Every thud being a new word in a language that is much more intimate than any word to escape from the tine of his loving tongue.  
Every beat followed by a relieving exhalation.
An exhale which disguises sweet thoughts
regarding the fact that your body is
a language i want to be fluent in.

Love is spoken through the soul
and seen from the way his eyes light up to an extent that shames even the moon in a dark October sky.

Love is an emotion of the heart, not a phrase.
Love is not worrisome or unsure.
And that's why when your in love and someone tells you they love you ,
you instinctively answer with
"I always knew".