Walking along the waterside
Fingers sliding over long grass
I slump and sit in the grass
The sun just having set
You were once familiar

I gaze into the waters
My fingers tracing the ripples
Wandering along the direction
It flows
Wondering, why my fingers
Never seem to grasp
And fall into flow with
The waters that reflect the
Light I always like to see

There's always a depth to familiarity
That has the mind at it's
Beck and call
Just a scent and the mind is
Overwhelmed with history
Spinning
Spinning spinning
Release
A rush of emotions spill
In consistency with the nerve synapses
Connecting
Nostalgic or regretful,
Content or melancholy;
Always a constant reminder
Of the difference you can
Never return to.

Planets in their orbit
Each with their own moons
The pull of gravity
Guiding us
But we are in different
Galaxies
No force acting between
Me and you

And I've seen plenty of moons
Stars and galaxies
Pass me by
Pull on my path
And then leave me
And whether they leave
Space junk, darkness or
Pull me out of my orbit
It all leads to the same thing
Me losing something that was
Once familiar.

And yet to orbit,
Two bodies must have mass
And each time, I fell into their pace
Willingly.
A force requires two and yet
I...

I don't want to go back to
The familiar which left me
Not for what I have lost but
Rather what I could not find

I do still wonder whether
My weight is not enough
While I try to calculate
What forces work for
Me
And yet I also wonder
If there is a force
That will
Not crash, share light and
Balance the space-time dimensions
That surround me

Claw at my chest
Raw flesh in my breath
Scream in the pressure of my tongue
Leave me be
For I am one.

Skin under my nails
Shrieking wails echo against
The walls of my brain
Leave me be
For I can barely handle one.

Dark room
Silent room
Empty room
With the exception of me
For I am one.

I am one;
So why is human nature
Burdened by the need for more?

Curving fingers
Tear streaks
Toned words,
Tracing around
The curve of my heart

Seeping words
And the thoughts
Attached...
Tracing the
Unique troughs
And crevices:
Modelling the
Sensation of
Clenching

Swirling..
.

These sensations
Aren't foreign
To my mind
Even if the
Feeling is
Or isn't;
Almost tangible

And
Yet
I
Clench
Stop
Freeze
I am
Stuck in place

I'll tell you
The story of the circle
Stuck in its path
Slowly turning
Moving forward and yet
Slowly turns back
And although the circle
Tries to pull
Away from its path
The curve is set,
The beginning is its end
Nothing changes;
Not it's knowledge,
It's perspective
Or prosperity.
Full circle,
No beginning
No end.

I'm sorry but I'm
Thankful all the same
I wanted and yet
You weren't above
The values that I hold dear
And as these values
Continue to slip away
Along with
Everything else
I do not regret
The choices I've made

I am not a creature who regrets
And yet I know when that day comes
I will