Dreaming of a new day
Hoping the past fades away
Never knowing the truth
Cause the lies always stay

Nightmares await my waking hours
And reality's dreams never really mattered
So I surround my self with a wall of glass
But the past crashed in and my faith was shattered

And that wall falls into a black hole of despair
Leaving my emotions exposed, naked and bare

Love is a burning cigarette
That makes ashes
Out of the pieces
Of me and
The pieces of you.


--Eleanor Rigby

I'm off to work
25 minutes later
I'm on my desk.
It's empty.
The day passes by
so smoothly
Nothing to stir the heart

I'm in my car
it drives so well
Nothing that makes it stop

I'm back home
dinner at 7 pm.
Nothing exciting to tell

It was a good day.
A fab year
and a decade passes like that.  

There's strange odour
emanating from the ether
I look at my hands and feet
now covered in brown-orangey rust
I've turned into oxide.

They tell you not to fall too fast
For you will be crushed
But what they don't tell you
Is you'll get crushed anyways.

You damaged my heart slightly that night,
little pokes here and there,
And my blood is calling out to me,
wanting to be released.
And my razors are sitting smiling at me,
because they know my demise and
they love towhat they're seeing.

but I won't give in, I'm not that weak.

You wrecked my emotions slightly that night,
and it's a emotion crash
in my heart body and mind
"Crime scene" tapes hanging all around
because my happiness was killed
and along with it my laughter died.
And my tears are crashing against the walls of my eyes
because they too know my demise.

but I won't give in, I will not cry.

You took my sleep slightly that night,
staring in the dark,
creating my own sky
It's beautiful and so was I.
And my insecurities are awake
they're by my side
trying to hold my hand
and mock me tonight.

but I won't give in, tonight I'll smile
even if it's fake, I will smile.

A glowing warmth
lights up the front yard
and slivers
of sunshine
touch gently upon
your brown eyes.

A butterfly blazes yellow
and in the breeze,
tall, old trees sway
together, ever so gently.

A sultry kiss
blown across a lazy heaven
brushes tenderly against
your blushing cheek,
and a summer sun
burns through the mundane
as the murmurs of the universe
reverbate far within your brain.

That's when you surmise
maybe its not just plants
that photosynthesize.

to grieve the loss of someone alive
makes me wish i were dead
facing fears we once faced together
i face alone instead
the unthinkable had to happen
though it'd been a long time coming
now the dust has settled
i'm no longer left wandering
i couldn't say goodbye
i couldn't even look at your face
the hole left in my chest
is such a hollow space
it was the opening of a door
that was meant for my way out
the one i had refused to open
i'm now being pushed out

i've seen four stages of grief
up until this moment
and now the only one left is
acceptance
it isn't any less hurtful than the other four
and i've return like a stray
staring at the door

but it's not to be opened anymore.

miles of spines
my fingers travel upon your back
and i can't say
i ever looked behind me
at your neck

Everything was all
Lit candles and dusk
Hibiscus and pear
Unfurling out in smokey dragon tongues
Across my navy blanket.
Things seemed...
Sexier then
On a twin bed, surrounded by miles of
Forest.
Some nights,
Like a Highwayman
I stole away through the parting branches
The moon's cycloptic eye a beacon
Through the dead tree sea
And run to my Bess for kisses
Sweet, not-so-innocent touches
In the courtyard that overlooked
The Cemetery.