I wish I knew what you were thinking
It's killing me to be so unclear
Never able to catch up, I'm sinking
In a sea of gray, and you're nowhere near

Grabbing desperately at clouds
That were only ever in my head
Pleading, wishing, shouting out loud
Wishing to be natant - I can only tread

Won't you shed a little light?
The waters are deep and I cannot swim..
Won't you tell me if I'm right?
Aching all over, my chances look slim

Don't you know I need a little rest?
You've grabbed my heart, left your mark
And even when I'm trying my best..
Don't you know I'm afraid of the dark?

I don’t know what it means
But it’s something beautiful for sure
Giving me your all, no in-betweens
A little bruised, a little used, yet so pure

I looked up and saw you grin
A smile that touched my blue heart
Your kindness like a gentle wind
Slowly, tenderly, picking me apart

Soothing my wounds, helping me breathe
Building me up, dismantling my fear
Showing me the way to feel free
It’s so much easier when you’re here

Wondering where you’ve always been
Laughing, talking, touching, flowing
Nurturing the hidden tigress within
Helping, hoping, healing, knowing

A force for good, to which I’ve clung
The power you wield over me is strong and steady
Oh please, let loose your silvery tongue!
I was always here for you, and I now I am ready


To give in, and to let go
Let you color in the black
Watch it heal, let it grow
Show me you, and don’t hold back

A pause..

The pulse quickens
Throat swallows
Tension thickens
A breath follows

The silence weighs a ton
An everlasting duration
To the silence between someone
The sound of hesitation

Within the garden of my heart
A fragile flower grows
How much light is needed
It seems that no one knows

Some days it blooms
Fiery and bright like the sun
Other days it withers
Before the day's even begun

A deep and dark soil looms below
Complexity colors the delicate petals
A gentle breeze allows for dancing
And in the silence it settles

My heart seeks a caretaker
One with a gentle hand
As such rough manipulation
It can barely withstand

This little flower needs love most
With a true and steady touch
Tis the soft caress of a keeper
This heart has needed so much

I never forgot
No matter how hard I tried
The company we sought
The way I felt inside
Your favorite colors, and your deepest fear
The things you said that melted me
And helped me persevere

You changed my whole world
My old life shed like the skin on a snake
The blanket of security unfurled
But I dealt with the heartache

Because I had you
And though it was a lie
What happened was still truth
A story hard to come by

Oh, I never forgot
No matter the cost
You are often in my thoughts
Your presence, oh so soft

My heart was reaching out for you
And I meant every word I said
In the end I couldn't break through
To a heart already dead

You cursed my very nature
And you threw away our past
Changing until one day you were a stranger
Your new outlook so steadfast

But I never forgot the way you were
And what it was  we shared
Even if I'll never know for sure
If you ever really cared..

A new hope; a fresh start
Exciting, and frightening, too
From the moment I gave you my heart
I put all my trust in you

See, there are black marks where I've been burned before
And some wounds that are still trying to heal
But what you've given me is so much more
It's beautiful, and warm, and so very real

I'm scared but I'm trying to be brave
Because I want you to be mine
There's so much that I wish to say
As our lives and our hearts entwine

But I'll tell you with a look, a laugh, or a smile
I'll confess within my touches, my kisses, my embrace
That every second with you is worthwhile
I couldn't hide it if I tried
You can see it in my face

Abandoned under the guise of self-sacrifice
How many times have you told these lies

A wonder to behold in your own right
Latching on, holding tight
I was lost the moment I got in your sights

A silver tongue with unmatched wit
Even the most dominant would submit
To your linguistic lashings

Skilled in verbal maneuvers and molding minds
You reveled in being one of a kind

Sly, and slick, smooth and quick
Your trick was finding what made me tick

You made me yours, then slipped away
I was your toy, begging to play

But then you were done; tired I suppose
You disappeared, to where..god only knows

You played the martyr, a victim, a pawn
Suddenly all of your power was gone

I know better, but I still feel incomplete
The flavor of erasure is so bittersweet