Sick stomach,
food that won't stay down.
Loud music,
drowning out the sound of sniffling.
Pillows damp,
from trying not to scream.
Tired body,
exhausted from doing nothing.
overactive brain,
thinking of way too many things.

Tonight's the night I lose my mind,
it left with all of the people that walked out
of my life tonight,
left me alone,
just simply alone.
No one is around anymore,
but I have my music,
I guess that makes up for it...

Shaking hands,
typing out words that they don't mean.
Heavy eyes,
that won't close.
Shivering body,
freezing under blankets.

I'm sorry I can't do anything for you,
I can't do anything for myself
I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you
I'm not good enough for me either
I'm just a burden to you,
and you finally walked out of my life
Why can't I blame you?
I wouldn't have walked in

You know, when I said I'd die for you,
I didn't realize you would be the one that would **** me.

I have a smile that can light up the world
People stare at me and sigh, Why can't I be that girl?
I laugh and it sounds like bells
But no one knows that I go through hell
My mother has a fear that she will grow old
My father hits me when he thinks I grow bold
I smile and show my teeth at school
But when I am home, I am no longer cool
I have the most perfect scars on my wrist
Because my family treats me like ****
They are so beautiful, so nice
They are perfection.....it will suffice
I cry each night
My tears blocking out the light
My dad comes in and raises his hand
Next day at school, *I fell down practicing with a band

I'm addicted to having my heart broken

Sometime while he's groping my chest
He rips my heart out of it

I live for being lied to

Keeping my eyes covered staying blind
As to only rely on his words

I'm crazy about being a game piece

To be handled and moved wherever he pleases
For toys are meant to be played with

Mostly though
I'm addicted to having my heart broken

She walks with a purpose, no fooling around.
Eyes fixed in the distance, her destiny found.

Head held high, a confident pride.
Discreetly wiping the tears she just cried.

No signs of weakness, no prominent shame.
Stricken with turmoil, herself to blame.

Into the night she silently treads.
Leaving no trace of the horror she dreads.

I never really understood depression until recently.
I always thought people where just babied when they were young,
Or they just cared too much about the subject,
Or they just didn't know the joy of knowing Jesus.

I would tell them to be happy.
I would list all kinds of reasons,
Like how lucky they were for this or that and so much more.

But now I understand.
My heart has been shattered and I know depression.
I know what it feels like to not be able to eat or sleep.
I know that nobody can say or do anything to help,
Except maybe the one you love.
Sometimes.

I know what its like to have a great family and friends,
But nobody to talk to.
I know what its like to be a priviledged individual,
But still feel empty.
I know what its like to have everything I need, plus more,
But it still isn't enough.

I finally understand what its like to be depressed and suicidal.
And it *****.
My heart goes out to everyone in the same position.
And I hope we can all get out of this whole.

And for those who don't understand depression,
Just know that its not your fault we can't be helped,
Because nothing helps.

We might seem ok,
Because that's the show that we put on everyday
So others won't know.

We just need you to be there for us.
Not to do anything except be there.