Today is one of those days
Where my insecurities pile up
Like fallen wilted leaves.
It happens seamlessly, silently
But right before my eyes
Like the change of seasons
Outside the window.
Why must loneliness embrace me
Like whirling autumn winds?
And why does darkness come
To tear my sutured wounds apart?
Heal me, colours, songs and light
So I'll be ready to carry on
Through the frostbitten night.

There's a swing in my step
Which I'm unused to
On a cold winter evening.
No stars up above,
Only city lights from below,
And the snow looks like
Magnolia flowers in the trees.
I feel like dancing in the streets
But they'd think I'm crazy
And maybe I am,
But why would it matter?
I'll just keep on smiling,
And then smile som more.

Who are you and
Who am I and
What do we want and
Does it matter if
We stay where
We were before

No difference
No attachment
No memories
No regrets

It seemed it was a little too late
For recuperation.
Once it was all I ever saw
But now your face
Is mindlessly forgotten.
So don't return,
Don't try to be
A September summer day,
Because you'll never be one
If you ask me.

Please,
remember what I try to forget
so I don't lose touch
with who I am now.

Please,
clench those memories
in the black of night
so I may sleep without torment.

Please,
carve the scars off my skin
so I can look at my reflection
without flinching with disgust

Please,
bear the burden of my past
so that I can carry on
with my life in the present.

I know I'm not much for the world to see,
yet I feel like I'm different,
like there's something hidden inside me,
stirring beneath the surface.

I often feel like a flower in the shadows,
or a shard of glass covered in dirt,
unrevealed, my true potential,
unpolished, unpretentious, unheard.

Yet, I dream of the day I bathe in sun,
and scatter my light prismatically,
but not for the world to admire me,
but to see for myself, how brilliant I can be.

The morning light revealed your shadows
every speckle and every tarnish
how immaculate your inperfections were;
I adored every single one of them

You left that morning to never return
I thought I would implode and drown
so every day I waited for a miracle
but you were as elusive as God himself.

Still, I remember that cold winter night,
when moonlight drew falling stars in your eye
your heart's desires bloomed just for me,
and how the blush of your lips kissed my cheek.

but here I lie, awake in darkness
without my lover and only tears as company
I wish we could turn back time to that night,
but only in my dreams could our love last forever.

There's something about this night
Because I can't seem to fall asleep.

    Maybe it's the starlight
    Seeping through the blinds
    Reminding me of my fingers
    Running through your hair.

          Maybe I'm half asleep,
          Because I can barely pick up your scent
          It's warm and comforting
          Or is it not really there?

                Maybe I'm already dreaming
                Because when I listen to the darkness
                I can hear you breathing
                Peacefully, right beside my ear.


There's something about this night
Because I can't tell if I'm asleep.

I met you in a dream
On a staircase in Warsaw
And it was like nothing had changed.
You embraced me
With fondness and warmth,
Like the last time we said goodbye.
Your kisses, equally passionate
And your smile, a comfort among strangers.
For a moment, it was just us
There, on the staircase in Warsaw,
With flickering lights and rushing people,
Enveloping us in the vibrating city.