some girl muttered,
under her pretty breath,
through her bubblegum round lips-
that i was a train wreck-
a walking,
talking,
breathing,
train
wreck.
and i agreed.
because i'm not a beautiful suicide,
i didn't land on the top of a fancy limousine,
i didn't leap from the top of the empire state building,
i wreck full force and careless,
i wreck into others without braking,
i wreck in the middle of absolutely no where with no one to care
i wreck in small towns and i ruin lives.
i ruptured their organs
and i ripped their flesh-
i ruined their bones
and i ripped their ligaments-
i readjusted their joints
and i ravished their brains.
i slit their throats and
wrists
thighs
hips
just so i wouldn't feel alone
they were the same as me.
Sometimes I get really upset during showers and remember I'm not a very nice person. I haven't cut in almost a year- 10/22/13.