Khaniek

Khaniek Jan 2018

You can’t be mad if she found love. You never loved her. She has evolved. Love is a lesson and she’s a student, ready and willing. The past has no presence here.

#love #lessons #past #prsent #future

Khaniek Dec 2017

Let Me In

I want more words.
Talk to me more please.
Show me how much you need me to hear your thoughts.
I want to be inside of your head, right there chasing away your doubts.
Is that too much?
Let me in baby, I’ll show you peace in there.
Inside those fears I’ll shine love.
This is it though,
I won’t ask again. .

#love #peace #share #thoughts

Khaniek Nov 2017

Excuse My Thoughts

Seeing where the world ends and where it should begin,
caught up in what was instead of what is.

Craving sweet nothings and empty promises just to make the day lighter.

Wanting the lies, just to be comforted enough to sleep through one
night.
Knowing the truth and ignoring it for the a pleasure that will soon disappear.. too soon.

Lost in a paradise created by envy and greed, selfishly separating myself but staying close enough to fuel the fire, accepting the warmth it creates , but still so cold.

Living in a time where everything is a game and everyone is in a hurry, no can be trusted and your bestfriend is the one plotting your demise.

Sweet revenge on my tongue, the bittersweet taste of loving what's wrong.

#cold #emptiness #envy #greed #bittersweet

Khaniek Oct 2017

Whispered.

Come here and whisper in my ear all the lies you feed yourself,
The fairytales that should chase the nightmares away.
Tell me about the times lost,
How you went searching for what you thought was promised.
Tell me when you realized that nothing is promised. How the nightmares were reality and the fairytales did nothing to comfort your heart.

I want to know how you still smile.
When everything in you cries, the tears that hit your pillow every night, the unanswered questions that plague your mind, the dishonesty, the brokenness, the pain that festers still with each breath you take, the aching in the pit of your belly, the endless pulsing agony that travels straight to your fingertips simply because of a name said,
You know what comes next. Why do you take the same steps? Why are you still willing to smile?
Nothing will be left. Then what?

I can not smile for you. Not the way you’d want me to. I will not pretend. I will not pretend for you or anyone else.. I refuse to accept this false happiness so that you can laugh and smile with your woe.
If you need him so much I won’t tell you to let go,
Just don’t expect me to be apart of your gaiety.

#lies #broken #sorrow #hurt #acceptance

Khaniek Sep 2017

I Life..

I'm always in a rush to be more than I am at the moment. Not that there's anything wrong with wanting to be more,
It's just that tomorrow isn't promise to anyone. Later isn't guaranteed.
I only have now.
Right now I choose to be happy. I choose the life that I am now living to smile and feel okay regardless of death's glare.

And the love that I am afraid of, the hurt and pain that I've experienced before and most likely to come, I welcome it now with open arms.
Every second I'm alive is borrowed time. I choose to be happy. I choose honesty, loyalty and friendship. While I can't trust everyone I won't walk around with distrust in my heart. I'm tired of being cynical.
I welcome the rain, the snow and the heat. Whatever it is that comes charging in and banging on doors ready to break and destroy, I'll fight however I can.

I choose to accept life as it is. Should sadness barge in one day, I'll cry. No more holding back tears in fear of looking weak. I'll holler and scream when I am angry at the world and its tragedies. Things that I have no way of controlling but I am feeling, I will express myself.

And I will walk, run, swim, dance whatever way I choose to exercise, when I feel like. I will not be dictated by social standards. I choose to enjoy the skin I'm in.
This is not for anyone but me, right now in this moment that I'm living, I choose to be free.

#life #freedom #love #lost #redemption

Khaniek Sep 2017

I Want To Be An Artist..

I've wondered time and time again what the world must look like to an artist. Especially nature.
I get lost in the clouds when I stare too long..
sometimes, most times I hate myself for not having the words to explain what's in my head.
If I tried to describe how the sun feels on my skin or,
flying above the clouds looking down,
I just don't have the words..

A blanket covering the earth I would say or a warmth I wish to touch. I don't have words I say..

I wish I did know though so I could share my exact feelings with whoever is accepting.
Some day I wish to use my words as a paint brush, maybe then I would be considered an artist too.

#art #nature #life #dream #hope #artist

Khaniek Sep 2017

A Dark Place

I don't know how to make this poetic.
I don't care to make it beautiful.
Even now I'm questioning why I'm letting this out. Not even in my black book do I wish to share this nightmare.

"I want to let go though..

There is so much hidden behind this smile. So much discomfort when they brush against my skin, nothing but lies when I hear them speak, the reason why 'love' is something I admire for afar..

I get lost in my writing,
It's very therapeutic. But even this will haunt me for days. How would you suggest letting go of this dark space?

He's right here with me,
Even now.
The reason why I hate them. He's constantly whispering in my ear, giving me reasons why I shouldn't allow anyone close. He's right on my back always a heavy load.

I still can't find the words to rid myself of his face..

I don't know how to share, my nightmare."

#hurt #crazed #lost #fear #anger #pain #betrayed