We can not win Lord.
“You” ask me to trust and hold on.
“You” ask me to forgive and love without question.
“You” ask me to give of myself more than I believe is there.
“You” ask these things of me, expecting me to bend willingly..
And I want to..
God, I don’t know how.
This is my is my farewell.
I wanted to love you.
I dreamt of it.
Holding your hand whenever I felt like it.
A kiss every now and then because your were mine.
Things of that nature.
This isn’t the first time I’ve proclaimed that I’m done and over this unrequited love but this is the first I’m writing about it.
I’ve held you so far above ground that I couldn’t get to you even if I tried.
I see it, and have for a while, seen how comfortable you are with me in limbo.
Is it possible that you haven’t thought twice about this and I’ve been in this web alone?
The more I think about it,
I see how true it is.
I took the necessary steps towards you.
You had no doubt of my intentions.
(I think I would hate you if you did.)
You understand, right?
I don’t want to hope anymore.
I give up..
In the beginning it’s beautiful, I hate that.
I’d forgotten before the reason for love.
Why we search in earnest for pain.
Pain you can’t ignore even if you try.
Pain that drives you to seek peace, even in the depths of depravity.
How we ache for relief, yearn for freedom..
To be free from what life thought love would never be.
Don’t ask for an explanation.
Take from this what you will.
How easily they forget..
so easy to forget..
Selfish being, you are the worst of them.
“Let your guard down, you’ll be safe with me. “
I’ve given up on what’s left of love in my heart.
No longer eager to find what the world thinks I need to feel complete.
I’m tired and empty.
Nothing left to offer,
And even if I did,
my fear of being robbed of the last bit of me is too constricting.
What hurts more than realizing you meant nothing to someone who you thought was everything?
Ah, I’m done.
I don’t think about you.
Instead, I think of ways to be happy.
You are not a part of that.
In my mind, love comes to me.
Loud and clear without hesitation,
Love finds me.
For this to be true,
I know it isn’t you.
The sun was my reason.
The stars, moon, galaxies, never ending space,
Guiding light, journey without end.
More than fairytales..
Love that is real.
Love that means more..
I want to introduce to my love language.
Show you places you’ve never dreamed of.
I want to experience myself with you,
Turn pages, start new chapters.
Let me show you my imagination.
Get into this creativity babe..
Wouldn’t you like to see my artistic side ?😏
Trust me, this is more than a joyride.
I’m sure we’ll reach pinnacles, overcome obstacles, engage in satisfying battles, lets leave a mess 🤫
It’s a first for me too, believe that.
Only you, no one else.
..were different. I still think so.
I could have, so many times, fallen into you.
maybe it was the thought of you.
What you could be. What you will become.
She’ll have all of what I’ve wanted.
What I think I need now.
But it’s not you and it’s not us.
Why is it when I need you
Ignored all of my messages
Ignore my cries for help
My cries for you
I get you've got problems too
But I am ALWAYS there for you
I drop everything for you
To help you
But when I' broken and hurting
You say you're always there
Just call if you need me
And you always answer
But you're distant and harsh
What do i do if i don't have it in me to call
What if i cant talk through the tears
What if i just need you to answer your **** texts and see what's going on
I need you *******
I need your care
I need to know we still have a chance
That you're not just finding ways to pass time before you leave
I need to know you still want me
Cause lately it doesn't seem like you do
And it hurts like a *****
I can physically feel my heart breaking bit by bit
And you're still so distant
Saying you're ready
You just don't trust me
But I've given you every reason to trust me
Proved myself every day
And you just brush it away
So instead of talking to you like i want to
I write words for strangers in hopes it'll make me feel somewhat better