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Why don’t you just stay away,
or am I the one to give expanse?
The angst your presence gives me is insurmountable,
Lethal, I was dead before I knew it.

I’ll move away by an inch today, then a meter by tomorrow.
Soon miles, and then I was gone.
Senseless, it is never that easy to abandon a deity,
or it is, just because I disallow?
Hey,

If you're reading this...
Know that I'm having difficulty trying to put my words together, and that normally never happens when I write.
Know that my mind is torn between being upset and being in love,
and that normally never happens when I think of you.
Know that every thought in my head right now is about you and what scares me is that I don't know if it's the same for you.

If you're reading this...
Know that there's nothing normal about how I feel about you.
My heart skips beats and my my mind races,
My cheeks hurt with each smile and every laugh from you is forced out of me because I can't keep it hidden.

If you're reading this...
Know that I love you.
And I know you do, but I still
hope,
wish,
and pray
that you feel the same.

Forever Yours.
Three years ago I said I do,
To my best friend and love so true.

A stranger with a tender heart,
Who's vows will never break apart.

He holds my hand when I am lost,
And see me smile at any cost.

He'll fight for me right to the core,
And strong enough to hold the door!

He's my best friend and lover too,
A bond so strong, a love so true.

I love him so without a doubt,
And surely cannot live without.

The past three years have felt like home,
And many many years to come.
I want you to know
one thing.

You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.

Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.

If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.

If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.

But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine
I don't know what I'm doing
I don't know what I'm feeling
I don't know where I'm going
I don't know who I'm being
I'm overwhelmed,
frustrated,
I can't cope

These are the slogans
I repeat to myself
Over and over again

Oh yeah

I'm a failure too
I've lived this life
What did I do?
What do I have to
show for it?

These facts about myself
are the one thing
I'm very positive about.

I repeat these slogans
day in and day out
always wondering
what I'm so
depressed about

I bury my head in these sands

Suffocating
Smothering
choking on anxiety
in my own
advertising slogans
on my private airwaves

To complicate
matters
worse
just because we think something
doesn't make it true
that goes for
self worth too.

But

Mindfulness
stands
watching the passing cars
from a freeway overpass
like our racing thoughts
not holding on
not making them go away,
in peace
simply
letting them
be.
States of mind are transitory, come and go.
Every Year I Grow Old,
Each Birthday Increases My Age
But Many Ask Me The Same Question
Still, How I Look So Young :-)

I Have Only One Answer For Them
Fall In Love ;
Because My Love Makes Me Feel
Young At Heart
And Remain Young Forever !
Poets are lonesome cactus vendors
In whose palms grow hurtful ascenders
From having to peel colored wonders
To those who dread thorny fruits - the dwellers -
With too many cores inside.

© LazharBouazzi
I opened myself up and pulled my ribs to the side
        Trying to find something that matters.
                   Something to stick to.
A religion,               a belief,
                |Anything
And in the              dark empty space
                |I found
Whatever                  led me to understand who I                                Thought I was
                **|was already dead.
I'm sorry
Sorry I'm ugly
Sorry I'm too loud
Sorry I am too tall
Sorry I snort when I laugh
Sorry I'm too skinny
Sorry I don't wear that much makeup
Sorry I'm too poor to replace broken shoes
Sorry I'm not everything you wanted me to be
he said that he still loved me
and desperately I said I still loved him too
"not too much I hope though"

**because *** and love are two different things
you're a fool to believe him
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