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Asominate Feb 2019
I can’t stop
Another day I starve myself

I can’t stop
Another day I abuse my body

I can’t stop
Another day I tear pieces of my flesh away with nails and teeth

I can’t stop
Another day I lose myself to my voices

I can’t stop
Another day I won’t let myself rest

I can’t stop
Another day I inhale toxic gases

I can’t stop
Another day I write a poem because no one would listen

I can’t stop
Another day I cry and break down, all alone

I can’t stop
Another day I can’t bear my own reflection

I can’t stop
Another day I realise that I’m all Daddy has

I can’t stop
Another day I think about his death

I can’t stop
Another day I claim to be fine

I can’t stop
Another day I sacrifice my being for someone who’s not me

I can’t stop
Another day I scold me for my imperfections

I can’t stop
Another day I give myself the things I deserve

I can’t stop
Another day I feel drawn to a knife’s sharp edge

I can’t stop
Another day I think of falling off a cliff

I can’t stop
Another day I think of the inevitable

I can’t stop
Another day I collapse due to physical and mental exhaustion

I can’t stop
Another day I overwork myself because of expectations

I can’t stop
Another day I wake up to find I’m still alive

I can’t stop
Another day I believe my delusions

I can’t stop
Another day my train of taught halts

I can’t stop
Another day I think of how disappointing I am

I can’t stop
Another day I feel out-of-place

I can’t stop
Another day I wish I wasn’t born

I can’t stop
Another day I try to put you out your misery

I can’t stop
Another day I scare myself

I can’t stop
Another day I use my fists and a wall to inflict damage to my skull

I can’t stop
Another day I enjoy peace in my concussion

I can’t stop
Another day I have an existential crisis

I can’t stop
Another day I wait for my healing

I can’t stop
Another day I wish my heart wasn’t beating

I can’t stop
Because it never stops
Repeat daily
Asominate Feb 2019
Desire is dope
I might get addicted, I find
If I become dependant
And let it take over my mind

It would become my everything,
I would want nothing else
I would take desperate measures
To feed the cravings of myself

I don't think I want to go down that path
And when you ask, sweep it under the rug
Desire is dope, but no thanks,
I don't do drugs.
Don't do drugs, kids
Asominate Feb 2019
I'm sick of these transfusions
I always have to give
You're always the one dying
And you need my blood to live

Universally you recieve
But very picky how you donate
As a universal giver
This I don't appreciate

Not everybody can love me
Not everyone has what it takes
Only my kind,
I find,
Can love me, and love me straight

No matter the circumstances,
My love never be returned
Because our transfusion doesn't work that way
You leave me dry,
To die
And burn
I'm O positive, by the way!
'Tis better to give than to recieve?
Asominate Feb 2019
Should I feel guilt,
Should I feel guilty
Becuase you're out there
Loving someone who's not me?
Asominate Feb 2019
Let me pour my insides out for you
...
Now tell me what else you want me to do?

After all the years of bad experiences,

There's bound to be much damage.


You said you'll leave me never
You said your love's forever
You said things would get better

...As time goes by...

I'm cracking under pressure
I can't keep me together
My dead meat's so much fresher

Butcher, butcher,
Where's your knife?

Mind don't,
Won't you take a life?

It is time to cut the meat
The finites, they love their steak

Rare
They like me super fresh
Yes
They like my meat bare
Because I taste the best
When I do not get any rest.
Asominate Feb 2019
Go away
I'm chemically unstable

There's no way
Now that we ever will be able

To be considered me
Truely alright, fine, good, normal


Medicine ungiven
Diagnosis wishing
Why others wouldn't listen?
Because they're talking flesh
Asominate Feb 2019
I'm totally fine,
Yeah,
Totally feeling
The disease you don't believe in

You say everthing has its season,
But my mind, it isn't healing!

Your 'training' leaves me tired
Pain makes me uninspired
Unless by you it's fired
From life, just might retire
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