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Aug 2017 · 733
deer diary #1
kalopsia Aug 2017
"One night it was just him and me driving through the city. The lights were flashing shadows inside the car and he was smiling while driving. His hair was blonde, again. I told him not to change them often. He just chuckles. His eyelashes protruding and curly like small waves. He looks so beautiful. Huge buildings, lamp posts and tall street lights were surrounding us. There were neon light boards sign on some old bars who plays country or some old music i can't remember. There were people who were strolling down the street in their heavy coats arms clinging to another person by their side. It was never a quiet night here but recently it became somehow. He hated heights so much but he liked city lights and buildings. And i couldn't love him more. When he was in Korea, he sent me a cute love letter, his hand writing was a mess but i thought it was the most perfect one ever. He called every night and asked what I like. I always tell him the same thing for the past 3 years, "I just want you. Nothing more, nothing less." He just chuckles and i know he was blushing. But he still comes home with something for me. He's nice and kind and perfect. He takes my breath-away and i love him so much. He's my favorite painting. He's a masterpiece. He loves coffee too much, i just hope caffeine doesn't eat his system. He liked mornings and evenings. Life was better with his smile shining like the blazing sun and his sleepy voice telling me to go to sleep every night. He liked playing soccer alot. He likes his coffee bitter but his heart was pure and his smiles were sweet. He is very appreciative and generous and I couldn't thank the gods above for this wonderful human right here. He's my sweetest favorite serendipity and i thank him for our unexpected redamancy."
okay so i wrote this on my livejournal last april 29, 2016. you can check some of my writings there (tho its so few) kingdeerhan.livejournal.com
Apr 2015 · 596
Untitled
kalopsia Apr 2015
and they asked me,
"What is it like loving him?"
I told them,
"it was like tightly holding the most beautiful rose on earth while its thorns sweetly bury into my palms,"
i smiled and continued,
"it was so painful but worth it."
Apr 2015 · 532
Untitled
kalopsia Apr 2015
he was a star
i tried to reach
i couldn't fathom
couldn't keep;
he was a rose
that i couldn't pick
scared to see
it die in my pit'
i'd rather die
for it to breathe.
Jun 2014 · 9.7k
the pulchritude in you
kalopsia Jun 2014
i walked in a garden
i saw roses, daisies, bougainvilleas
pagoda and peonies too
and somehow they reminded me of you

the roses reminded me of your lips
how it's so red and lovely
how it curves whenever your smile along with your eyes
how it separates when you laugh

the daisies reminded me of your eyes
how it slowly blooms beautifully in morning
how lovely when it slowly closes at night
how chatoyant it was when touched by light

the bougainvillea reminded me of your being
how you stood strong despite everything
how you stayed lucent and beautiful
how you let yourself bloom in many colours

the pagoda reminded me of your skin
how it's yellowish and eternally beautiful
how smooth and soft it was
how selcouth it seems in my retina

the peonies reminded me of your heart
how it's still exquisite despite of its fragile figure
how it's still eesome even though it looks wrinkled
how it stays strong and pulchritudinous

walking in the garden felt serendipitious
it felt like walking
inside your existence
and i liked it.
this is dedicated to a guy who never know i'm existing.
May 2014 · 1.4k
Kalopsia
kalopsia May 2014
Your eyes are the ocean
Your lashes are the waves
It’s a privilege to drown in them
And even live just for a day

Your collarbones are the trails
My lips want to wander forever
Your jaw line is the road
I would walk forever

Your lithe being
Is enough to take my breath away
Your pure heart
Is enough to let me stay

You are ethereal
You are otherworldly
Your beauty is abyssopelagic
You are perfect

My heart flutters when I see your previews
(I became an agastopian because of you)
And every after sunset and sunrise
I still fall in love with you
what do you think? ;_____; actually i made this for tao <3 a member of a boyband. i really love him, he's so special in my life. <3
Jan 2014 · 424
For you
kalopsia Jan 2014
i will drive you out of your loneliness
love you until im broken into pieces
until the sun meets the moon
until the birds run out of tune
Nov 2013 · 2.4k
Old Polaroid Photos
kalopsia Nov 2013
"In our old attic
I saw a basket made of batik
It was covered with dust
But inside it reminded me the past

I saw our old Polaroid photos
It is our couple mementos
Some pictures' ink already faded
But for me our memories never ended

And I miss you, your warm hugs
Baking you brownie in a mug
I miss seeing your funny sinister smile
And now I can't even see it for awhile

It was hard to describe what I have been through the years,
Every day I was in tears
From you, I wanted to hear
That "I love you, my dear."

This Polaroid photos, I will keep
In my heart, very deep.
'Till we meet again, my dear'
Maybe not today nor in a year.
But please promise me you'll always be here."
Nov 2013 · 637
"Candy"
kalopsia Nov 2013


Candies are nostalgic
because it was my codename for you.
Whenever I see them it reminds me of you.
You’re sweet and friendly,
and kind too.

We became best friends
until the world ends.
You told me everything
even about the girl you keep on loving.

Then one day, you started ignoring me,
I asked myself “Who’s me to you?”
it hurts but you never knew.
But still my heart beats only for you.

Nov 2013 · 404
i was there;
kalopsia Nov 2013
when you loved her
i was there;
when you were hurt
i was there;
when you were broken
i was there;
when you needed someone
i was there;
when she broke her heart
i was there;
when you've broken mine
you were never there.
Nov 2013 · 482
"Now; Right now"
kalopsia Nov 2013
now he's in love with her;
now they're happy;
now they're probably together;
now they're so close;

right now i'm broken;
right now my heart is breaking;
right now i'm crying;
right now my mind is screaming;
right now my body's shaking;
right now i'm literally dying.

— The End —