Are we long overdue?

Because no more do I see any potential in you...

Billowed and pasted, rollicked and wasted,
the night takes hold and Samantha, you remember her,
she's smoking again. This is her last pack though.
Drinks poured. Drinks spilled. Kate and I are talking
like people with scheduled late afternoon love affairs. There's
a car alarm going off in the distance. I love this blouse. Is it new?
No. It looks new. I love your perfume. You aren't wearing any?
Must be a natural—and the first to arrive at the party, Chris and
Evan, they're the first to leave, and we listen intently as one, or maybe both, tumble down the stairs. There should be waivers for second floor
apartment parties. Kate, you deserve so—I know. I know. You've got this light. Jesus. I'm just saying. Is it radiant? Yes, it's radiant. And they're lighting their drinks on fire now in the kitchen, some concoction of amaretto and 151 and a kickback of Coors. The flames reflect in their eyes, their cheeks a soft amber, and most of them are smiling, not sincerely, but when was the last time you could give yourself over completely to joy? There's a siren in the distance. Someone says they're coming for us. I'm going to the bathroom. Do you need help? And there's this ceiling fan with LCD Christmas bulbs strung around the blades. A myriad of claustrophobic yellows and whites and blues. Have you seen that video of the ****** having a baby? And he brings it up on his phone. Someone says, Oh my god I love this song from the bathroom. I hadn't noticed the music before now. Drink this. What is it? You'll see. And Samantha she says she's got to step outside for a second. And someone drops a hookah coal on the beige carpet. There goes the deposit. There's incense. There's a Scentsy. There's Febreeze being sprayed liberally. Can you drive? Can you? Do you want to? You know? I've ate a lot today. The songs keep getting skipped. Parquet Courts, Michael Jackson, Lionel Richie, Chvrches, Miley Cyrus—wait, wait put on some SWIFTY. We're going to fire up in my closet if you want to join. It's a walk-in. Evan's back now. He kicks a mirrorball across the kitchen tile with Chris, who's also back now. Where's Samantha? She's smoking. She shouldn't be alone. You remember last—That won't happen again. I'm just saying. Well, you can stop saying. Sirens again. Closer. We're in the walk-in. Kate tugs on my sleeve. I take a pull off the bronze pinch hitter. Do little circles with my head. ****, she says. What? It all starts fading out, the rush of dark, the rush of light. Someone says trash can. Sirens. I'm just trying to—Shut up. I'm just trying to—Shut up.

Sometimes I wish
To live the eagle's life.
Full of light and sharp eyesight,
Upward over 600 meters
But still,sharp to locate a mole underground.
With speed and swifty,
Lightening as it strikes .
Devotion to risking,
Can pass trough a metal and die
Just aiming at the mole,
Powerful and strong,
Can cause currents,to storm stumbling blocks,
Moving them out of its way,
Success to pick grasses
If at all to miss the mole.

I am growing the eagle
And crazy i am,
I will pick a stone
If at all i miss Gold,
But i am aggressive
I will finally pick myself GOLD.

YOU CAN TOO LIKE MY STORY
be the next eagle,
Sharp eyesight you employ
See the opportunities, and try
If you miss them don't cry
If you get them don't die,
Grow stronger and fight harder
Pass through metal if you miss focus
Employ swift motion
Calculate more than a computer ,
Be risking,
One day,
YOU WILL GO HOME FULL OF SMILE.
I tell you.

It could be the duchess
Or maybe the CEO
Or the media mogul
Who almost stole the show

Consider the brash *******
(He does look kind of shifty)
Then again there is the gambler
(Everyone calls him "Swifty")

Check out the carefree diplomat
With that fake smile but no charm
And then there's the airhead heiress
With tattoos adorning her arms

My money's on the senator
Always running, always winning
His wife seems kind of suspect too
With her endless mindless grinning

And then there is the debutante
Who flirted with the football star
And don't forget the pro golfer
Who spent so much time at the bar

But after all that guessing
Throughout the suspenseful show
Turns out the butler did it
...As if I didn't know!

My pores are ******* you in.
I'm noticing this tone, through all my words, and warps and pieces,
it's like wordplay but less fun and more caustic.

My peach tree, shaken, branches splayed
(I really like your peaches won't you shake my tree?)
Peach, just a small variation away from bleach,
which is a variation of blech,
which is what is often going through my mind when I think of ways to respond to you.

My sparkling diamond of a
(kitchen floor)
soul, scrubbed red raw,
sometimesIwishIdidn'tchangeasmuch
asIpretendIhave,orrecogniz­ethatIhaven't,really.

I want to eat crack
(s in the linoleum)
all day, on my patio, and be surrounded by good vibes.
Vibesvibesvibes.

My ache is raw,
like an egg freshly cracked,
or the red meat on the counter.
Your flesh (my meat),
my red gaping open string of words and saliva.

This had every intention of being a light, swifty thing.
Furiously twittering (twitter wickedly),
my mind isn't always this dark I promise.
I promise a million things, but I'm still trying to understand myself.
Understand myself, oversit yoursociety.

Why do you take your pictures with your open mouth?
You are drooling all over my lens.

Every meal is hard to swallow
With you present at the table
My stomach rumbles
Yes, in pain
The swifty of my ways
I absolutely hate eating with you
Yearn to I do, retch
The unpleasant time
In which should be my fathers
My hero, NO MATTER WHAT
You take his place at the table
But never, will you EVER have a place in my heart
Ruined it you have for yourself
Many not once a time
including grandmother, has she despised you.

Mind, Soul lost by the unsueing reality of deception

Bewildered, by change, unable to forget, forgiving's only inches from the pain

Strange trees seen in in this forest of lies, unable to see

What is real, and who will be real with this man's unbrageous heart

Knowing only who betrayed, blinded by who loved him once

Times are gone, for healing

Times for change swifty seize, a man's hope for redemption,

Light is seen through the darkness, sanguineness is in view now, for this betrayed soul

Grab hold, never let go

For fear of no return, to plummet in a perpetual state of disatifactory,

The man just wishes for happieness in a pernicious world

hair dashing vision deploy sud featherless\
motion in active taste bud slipped on eternal\
tip of my tongue whistle lunge internally\
**** drizzle dripped seating scampi intestine\
grip swung intensity hitting uvula grump\
the bedroom slippers pajama snap running\
throat hiccups stuck doll sitting smudge crap\
pat tack in scratch mouth I due alley loop mucus\
packing trunk wood you irritate stove chappy baker\
hunk the lock spinning the sling cling on schnapps\
surviving by the beer Craving Peace of ear confession minding\
the sake of better judgement intrigue maleficent impression\
spite traditional contraceptive contradict hypocritical Kitab rewrite\
Ktab inducting paschen arrange friction pronounce tissue adjudicated\
hit or miss mission issue clevis tension ******* metabolism buoyant crevice\
sullied virginity abolishing hip ripping meat window damp moist cherry\
fur confined steed Structurally Mounting **** transcoding soil instrumenting\
matrimony ring band regent gown slapping *** crack Larry the Cable Guy wed\

Din Din Baby Fat Naming like/
be Naming Baby Shat Chat/
bei spin nozzle creek up/
drift bottleneck swifty/
dream line bleachers/
above the body top/
under tummy tuck/
wackbush stroke/
c ******* broad/

A brownie being offered him,
the missionary cringes;

he's heard rumors,
messages have been passed on,
Sybils served tea and
chocolatte once fed gods
native to this chapparral where I dwell

with lizards and coyote, yote, like mote in y'eye

don't let the accent fool ya, said the preacher from his jet.
I say,

Wise ***** are not named otherwise, in The Bible, I mean.
SO,
lieve me being in the *******
is no missing of the message
wrapped
in Christmas ribs.

We've come quietly, adverbs being repre-ived,
at the moment
from stupid Tom Swifty readers, ****-flash

I hate lys, not because Stephen King does,
but be cause Herr Dunklesohn
mocked me
forn not recognizing a Tom Swifty as such.

Same guy told me Mrs. Malaprop was named for her
character-istic
intrusion of forced onset cognition ignition

the technic in fully articulated use of F and N in S
and M toned down to PG

when, gee, I think we're alone.

leaves us dangling near the source of Jonatan Edwards
actual
idea
the thread that holds us, for all we weigh in worthiness,

nada, right? so we ain't heavy. riiiight. bro. sos ye know,
this ain't me, we integrated, we crazy voices in the readers mind

we all sound the same so some same same-same
life goes down the drain

in one swirling direction from a solar POV, but bacwards,

not *******, blowing, in the wind, the answer,
my friend,

stupid chant an encantation from the substrata

think nothing
meditate
of it
sit

squirm and be a kid. You made it. This is the rest in the story.

I stare ahead at the wavy blue,
As I recall the lovely sue.
Her love is still well hooked within,
I am not so sure where to begin.
There was a time my heart was free,
A hummingbird on a willow tree.
But what fate had in store for me,
Changed my life a great degree.


I never thought I would fall in love,
With a pretty rose, a tender dove.
She grasped my heart with a swifty swing,
It hit me hard, not just a sting.
I lost my mind and self control,
But knew I’m here to play a role.
For what I learned along the way,
Love is a game no one can play.

There's days
where I look outside a window
and feel like I have no talent at all

I begin to say words in my head
that swifty intertwine together
like pieces to a puzzle

I apologize for all the years wasted
looking at the ground
angry at the world

I'm looking higher
than the clouds now
Further than the stars

I see the whole universe

I could not have been more sure about my feelings,
Until the day you and I began,
I knew for sure that it has always been you,
The one whom I have been waiting for,
You came in my life, like a bolt swifty taking all of me away;
Piece by piece,
I knew from the start that you would change my life,
I prayed for the day to come where God gives you a chance to prove to my family about your worth,
About the love that you have for me,
Our promises were not just put in words,
I carved each and every bit of detailed conversations we had to my heart,
I know you are my other half,
And I know that it's only you i want.

First 8 lines are always free, the rest costs 20 minuters
- Raw, working stock poet tries and guesses, cast
as cares away, in spells… opposing all solid-state profits,
I disagree with most superlatives,
August is far crueler,
everybody knows. As a month,
April is
Seed
come so, see
Time come soon, prythee, swifty, didwe
Harvest, bestness contended for, proud
blue ribbon exceptionality, proved
-fecundity fructifity
consciousness, place in time known
light as punctual mass, echolialy lialy la la
- and also and also and also with you
~~~~ wavy thing, right
;rock on
who pulls past last rituals, past wars,
and war's threats,
defend the wall,
calling all outs in, defend the wall
fend off the opposing mind, in time, attempt
tempting all my desires to lieve be,
the state I'm in, once again
- no, I don't believe we're on the eve
- of destruction, my AI went auto inteleosic
Free am I, paid the life, or fifty years,
first come, first served,
learn the long way,
beats never learning at all.
- warrior spirit, something, like that
- say Maxwell's daemon is squeezin' yer bub-

not worried for my nation, not worried for
my error, nor for my will divided among my

auto refreshing systems, in the system,

set to flow at any speed we may agree, this fast
mean, statistical mean, free path, not
shortest distance, point to pointless whenever,
whatever,
mean free path, meandering, ring ring
beer commercial real life, as many can imagine
this is that good place, rest and relaxation, unwind,
- imagine you enjoy lines that insist, each
- line insists… it is all good, from one POV.
spin down, settle
light as the first point ever made in the game
of life on the line, strings of possibilities,
first free way, no entry fee,
we take -time, this whole thing took all day
to just now a flight of three warships
aim at Miramar, right over my valley
7:30 reread 6 m.
we feel - a sigh, some new sense esthesic
poeisic, sic, ever as it is written, so it is done.

[[[ Relegare. Read the records, find in the archives,
a volume, sealed under pressure,
to hold our emptiness out.

Popt. Popped that bubble, bubble
of thought, full spread to the bezel, white space

-eventually we all fall apart, art, and craft. Raw
reality remains, complicated, many ply, many threads
per centimeter, me-assure, self fi, con science
think
aaaaaaaa we all know knowing does not lead to madness.

Far from the maddened crowd imagined, cast of thousands,
from today, as the mother of the eight billioneth breather,
born after the events near Alamogordo, that mother
is
done been born, it aint you.

[[[[

First place/ Blue Ribbon,
Second place/ Red Ribbon,
Third place, was probably green, but I do not recall.
I never noticed what color I got, I was third.

Got a requisition for the old military mind,
kept it shined, knew it was good for something,-

Some one, ah, yes, Fulton Sheen, asked me, on TV,
just like in the spirit, the way I hear it, no lie
is of the truth, yet, yes, I know,
how lies work, one must believe trust is possible,
not culturally defined, what it is, the wedom
feeling, me and you, bound to find the answer…

F.T.A. wei wu wei wu, too WAYtold you, … meet me
at that ***** colony in Vietnam, give a dam,
rebuild some dikes we blew to hell and gone, gone
awe, the we
still functions, the old military mind, we got the gaba
keeping mean free paths open to any
enquirery counsel of haught, haught, ought not we
- clearing percussive growl- insignificant
respect our predecessors. In deed, rewatch 957 hours

This
Is BBC, from the past yet to be completed in your futurer

------------ bleed through, has dear value here? NOW
Who asks of me a reason for this faith in me?
Waar. Alas. 8 wpm
Dear , God, what
Contention,
dispute
- repute
perhaps "repeatedly" (see re-), + putare
"to judge, suppose, believe, suspect,"
originally "to clean, trim, prune"

From <https://www.etymonline.com/search?q=repute>

Or PIE*pau, punch-
"to cut, strike, stamp" {;}

Content is king.
- moments, instants, we all know
pride, swelling heat, as we are
mostly micky mouse molecules, heated
e-motionally, as volume of conscious thought
shifts into save me, auto, self, image,
hot h2oh yes
rush from rage or shame,
AI puts the blame on Thymus glands planned
final message, at the canker worm's first byte

pre-serving pattern, rage, red-face grimace
peruperu, yaaaah,
-Ma-ow-ri co robbery-gasp
choke, cough, click off. Angery flesh,
where the lie you love ***** your reason
for war to a head, that is shrunken,
to a mathematical point,
to weigh against shame put on you by a contest,
for best…

It's business, busy, busy, busy, we all must be
busy about our master's business,
making disciples, ah, ambiguity, you *****,
discipline my poeisis plea-plea-please

break loose, hold the line at etho- no, esthesic

esthesic, sic, the es, essential esses, complex
enfolding from olden minds loosed in 2022.

The rub. Yes, per haps we rhearrange, create next
from another ify point made,
you know, you just do, right, sci-psi-psy, experientially,
inside
out, gleam, see that gleam, something like the rage
that reddened the last loser's face, that gleam in her eye,
uses twice that power,
one look, one look,
you know, she knows, just iust adjust a second perspective,

megamacro gravity lens, placed just there,

I am asking you,
to play a game, with ghosts of old agreements, oaths
kept,

to the proof of the promise; and not one  

-dared finish the reason strung together, over spreading pearls,
- until the internet ****** him in
- like, 1995
sheen shone in the word serpent, on tele-type roles
to the moon, Alice, Jones, what I miss, 1964
to the moon
as in, wise as, as is the voice, bray
hoo, uses {} these to appear obvious.
- in Kansas, we call these buttermilk skys,
to here 2022, that fast
real as ever.

Trippier than hell. BY FAR, be it known.
This is the soul of a sould out soldier-
monk- protestant dissenter, cursed
son of an itch
no man can scratch alone, be it known.
Be it known, echolalia glossalalial
'armonica.

Humming.

The imaginations, ours, not
the other people, we are not
other people now. We are you,
Dear Reader, from the Dear Diary
classification for emotional connection, sin is losing all connection.
- that is all. That is, the religious ordered     wall
It is, of course, of course,
correctible,
a matter of physics, time in truth,
alls it is.

Time in truth. As a regular thing,
a daily routine,
a quotidian thing that makes peace

seem this easy, for example.
7:48

I am saccharine kisses before lullaby led naps.
I wonder if you know your name yet.
I hear you giggling and cooing from your crib.
I see you've grown quite a bit.
I want you to stay small forever, my dear, I want you to stay small.
I am swifty cheek kisses before waving goodbye.
I pretend to want you gone from my nest
I feel like I've bitten a lemon.
I touch your shoulder before tucking you in
I worry Until she's gone, a shadow remains.
I cry over a loss soon to come...
I am apathetic side hugs before taking my leave.
I understand you're growing old and you're ready to flee.
I say I miss when you giggled and cooed,
I dream of your small little toes, 1 2 3.
I try to be happy that you're growing old like me.
I hope you know what I mean.
I am saccharine kisses before lullaby led naps,
But my kisses are frail and you’ll remember it as my last.

the phantom: the opera: the walking out: furious! Deutsche Opera: in English?! (Mozart's magic flute in English?!) shoot met in the head and promise me a slug's death of brain trauma! later her the island her with the two sexiest names: SASHA and NIKITA: if Islamophobia is so fake: why all this sober not sobering Russophobia?! so no: Islamophobia but all this Russophobia?! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUS! RUSZ! RUSZ! now the demon in my sleeping hour of ego: spawns! if Islamophobia was not so... irresistible... then why Russophobia so tantamaunt... but the Mongols are no longer feared: or the Christians... remains to be said: ones burned the library of Baghdad while the others burned the library of Alexandria... RUS RUS RUS RUS! row... by any and all scrutiny of allegiance: alliance: RUS RUS RUS! i stormed out of the opera like the phantom... took my respite in the Spanish wine cellar... i, have, had... enough!

fog of ego:
or how:
people personify:
leverage:
their dementia
their bipolar their their
them us we us win no win
this transit:
these cages of psychiatric
allocated: loss of soul
as if it's: something:
"personal"...
that it requires personification:
like e.g. schizophrenia
needs a humanity beyond:
beyond humanity:
a face: a personification
a presence a justification of hope
for lessening the ordeal
of parasitism...
  the fog of the ego...
which always bestows upon me
daydreams and lackluster
and bogus parodies and some ghosts:
it i
i it

       it i
       i it...

   it i
        i it...

            delving into the potentiality of experience:
which is: on a scale:
"preferred": the subjective: suspect quack
or the objective: soap and fringe:
i had a word on the ready just now...
objective... not soap: soap sort of unhinged me
from balancing my vocabulary...

subjective: suspect and quack...
objective: surprise and apathy: a dog's bark...
because i suppose imagining ducks:
but there are just so many red flags
concerning her:

last time i made a woman ****** and cry
simultaneously:
last time i made a woman ****** and cry
simultaneously...
i had to write it twice because i might
have forgotten the: huh?!
the last time i made a woman ****** and cry
simultaneously...
and all this: to erase the peaceful abode
of stretching out in my garden?
seriously?!
i saw Jesus in the clouds and the hell he brought
with him...
i implored for guidance
i implore too frequently:
there's that dynamic of PAREIDOLIA...
which is not something pagan which is not
a creed against:
not something the Church or Islam would
wage war against: what? loose geometry
association?

the fog of ego:
somehow there's a mathematics of:
the reflective inspiration:
to employ consciousness to destroy the ego...
to stop, not think... not think is a doing averse
to keeping with the Joan and John and the Ss...
to reflect is to employ a tactic of
the antithesis of verb: not think...
pause: but then the world spins out of control...
then comes the reflexive inspiration:
which is no inspiration at all:
considering that: the ego cannot be utterly
destroyed:
any attempt to do so implies:
the ego resurrects itself and becomes
spontaneously active: quantum: a potentiality...
a magical disappearing act and re-enactment...
in out
in out

            i and my it of i
which is that: id...
    it and of i within it
that, which is: alias: i...

                candy pop saga just listening to:
Taylor Swift
long gone at the nights spent la la in
Scandinavia myths
no antinatalism:
but i killed the father and now the orphan:
my duty my freedom
perhaps i want to make divinity
a form of contending:
perhaps i want to make divinity a form
of contention...

i find no uses in life or people
i just find: circumstances...
and people so sort of punctuate the in between
like 1 + 1 = loo...
kappa: sized: floating happily dead
the belly of a cat...

but base: i'm happy to escape the world
the antagonisms and the blue verve... of the blues:
i might as well haunt
the concept of guitar
so life is this vernacular of the jealous
paternity
and maternity
so now i'm going to get my ***** wet for a decade
before you creep in
no creeper: dying off with my parents...

like i'm 22... funny things happened to toy me
and mayonnaise and
i can be freaky and 13 all of a sudden:
do i want a child?
how can i break up with you
so that i can still "be in love with you"...
do i have to write like teenager girlie
seriously?!
seriously?!
              i will do it a third time:
seriously?!

      pooh biscuit brunch: salt on butter:
perfect combo: why not a pinch of salt
in milk, then?

      if one is claimant of destroying the ego
then one might as well:
deduct:
the reflective reconstruction practice:
a satisfying venture into the realm of failure...
then the...
reflexive construction "prejudice":
of spontaneity my ego appears: then disppears
then nothing
and god and ego
one and something dissimilar...
females as drugs: femininity in the eyes of women
AVATAR:
femininity in the eyes of men...
shoving the suffragettes down ***** rabbit-holes...
but i have this calm
and this garden i have
the quest of Candide and Schopenhauer...
am i...
for the frivolity of the anticipated life:
then the fates disgust themselves and alternate:

it's nice to get drunk and high
and look at life with a sober see spoke spec said
i think i need to take care of my
mother and father before
i really want to *******...
sorry the Bible is just one book
and please, don't invoke the old testament...
i wanted to be least cruel
when you told me that i would
not leave ghosts in things
the books i read:
the records i played:

there! where were you when i was my
despondent and lost
until who?
until i found i again!
   again i and and i and i and i not YOU
NOT YOU...

      this love is like faking cleavage:
***** hiss fit of cats....
better and i courtier the dogs barking?
you want woof the same
**** different cover...
BIG flag...
not even RED...
you speak of Jason and Geoffrey and "Timothy"...
i don't remember
speaking about
Ilona, Promis, Isabella that much...
then again:
i'd only talk about Ilona and Promis:
but i try to not talk about...
but you you you you
you keep talking about your pasts....
as much as i love you
i don't feel enough love
in order to leave my father...
i don't mind venturing into aloneness
and philosophy stature: of status...

but you mention your exes so much so many times
i feel conflated:
sorry: you interrupted me:
sorry: who's the surrogate of learning
about geography?
your teddy bear girl is getting
her teeth checked?
sorry: the age is showing: already:
sorry to disappoint:
but to your relief:
i'm not going to go after a Taylor:
gun and teen...

                  youth and beauty is a sickness
of watching snails
regardless of whatever the hell it is they're
able to do....
but i'm feeling 22...
i just can't imagine the hurt that will
come Sci-Fi's way come Swifty's way...
when her
i'll remain the loser Poet
until i did: bad journalist... blah blah...
when her songs dry out and the momentum: shifting:
sizing up: dry...
                   when she languishes
from the perpetually immediate
until crowned: de-crowned...
throne: -ed: later entombed...

         that's a welcome experiment...
to imply the ABJAD
with LATIN... drop the vowels...
expose the consonants...
like already happens with keeping to
the strategy of
Chemical Nouns...
the toys are already in the sandpit...
but... it seems...
no one wants to play with them...

                 H₂O...

              meanings with ascribed lettering
in the alternate:
              hyper-:         a² = b² + c²

    ABJAD it already in place: to fall apart
geometrically and chemically...
into place...
Prometheus says my blues or not because
of you...

like we're 22...
dress up like hispters
and make fun of our exes..
ooh ooh so much arithmetic not worth
the plunder...
        
i am reminded: of my duty: of my concern:
that it cannot envelop
a gratification for the sense of purpose:
for man to love woman
is the greatest defeat
to have to avenge: with a victory
over nothing...
i cannot:
i have: restrained myself:
twice now: for worth of day:
masturbated without
claiming release: the ****** a world born
around me...
but i refrained...
and you were to: entice me with all
that: antagonism?

there's a point to aging and being mortal
and stopping grieving and hierarchy
moral authority
turn the other cheek
i say so anti-what's-supposed-to-be-alive
therefore the highest man
in example:
anti-

      in place of: not against:
in place of: instead...
like: oops?    not against:
to correct monotheistic logic:
which began with the Jews
******* things up with
the promise of the reincarnation of Elijah!

monotheism gone bad:
bad in the hands of the Hasidi
the anti-warring faction:
but remind me:
what other President of H'America looked so good
in order to pause and fist bump
the air...
regardless of conspiracy theories
the right righteous and suppose they could
be with the leftist and the "sanity projects":
control freaks on the LEFT:
not Islamic etc. blah blah..

                if not psychiatry qualified:
then lobotomy cursory: detail?
must meet mr. ***** Martin...
            you won't, please, forget:
the detail: that i implored you...
to come to me: all from you...

      but god forgive me if i still want
the girls to have all the fun...
i'm still 22... yeah...
like i need bus-drivers and plumbers
and that's not even my ego speaking:
ooh ooh i still need bus-drivers and plumbers
and you're the pop-out juice juice!
fountains of sunsets ooh ooh ah ah!
like my girlfriends give a ****
and won't later complain
and compete with all that materialistic bogus woegus...
like the prom queen:
i seriously wish she was born
in an Islamic country and was genitally mutilated:
rather than genetically improvised: as improved.

who said that? i hear voices...
i... who's i?
i didn't what the **** are you talking about?!
i hear voices...
i'm playing the wild-card...
there's... sometimes:
a joke without: a joke to give:
clarifications of impromptu.

¶( paragraphs in poetry are so ill defined:
like asking for geometry to
be algebra:
but geometry is an algebraic fusion
to treat numbers
as numbers and nothing spectacular
like numbers weren't the origin
of letters
but letters were the origin of numbers

LETTER > NUM<BER

numbers came from letters
not how the envy of the world is supposed
to be the genius of mathematical-physics...
sorry: football is!

such a strangeness in the air: such stillness
it's almost as if
someone had died
but it wasn't god
and it wasn't man

because no one had actually died:
what died was a concern for life
on the simple posit: vivo in mort...
life in death
as there is death in life

mort in vivo
not simply in vivo like pregnancy
but man's pregnancy to die
in vitro
in architecture
in all these pursuits
in science
in philosophy

i can see nihilism but not as prorposed
by Nietzsche in the individual
but en masse
in the masses
i have four days of concerts coming up
grueling 12h shifts
but i'm not supervising
i like being a chess piece rather
than a chess player: from time to time:
i like taking instructions
and i like giving instructions
during ***
but that's because i'm male
so

this little Eden of Euphoria
i drink a little i smoke a little
but i'm perfectly sober
but slur my speech my Golem
i must
my tongue is the King of Lizard
because it is a worm
it has not Endoskeleton
but an Exoskeleton
that burst into the air with moisture
and gases
and wasn't like the dinosaurs
porridge and oil and meat
and desert sands
my forefathers
invented the tree
the forest
they brought moisture into the air
to end the Volcanic Reign
of Chemistry and Geology!
i am of the DRAGON BORN!

            i quill a woman into bed
then hear her scream into the night
to make sun and moon collide!
because: i can ego trip when
i have destroyed the ego
i can ego trip because iq i qrite
therefore i can ego tripping
i am ego tripping: a silence from the destruction
the silent rebuilding process
i'll be with Keith on Turnstile GJ

gee
jay
gee
jay

  required reading of post-modernists:
Charles Olson:
the Kingfishers...
        
that **** is going to haunt to me
it's actually going to hunt Franz Saber
i square to the question:
god?
gentle child: god is not enough
Seismic in your church and churn of heart
believe me
i'm talking to at least 6 generations
of Happenstance Greeks
my sober mannequin to hide all the darkness
from low intellect
like brothers ******* sisters
like mothers and sons
like...

best exemplified: god dry to sleep
not thinking:
but what is a thinking thing
unlike a priest psychiatrist a surgeon:
a butcher:
a painter:
somehow this grand: alles uns!

nihilism in the masses i can understand
from Church and Parliament to
Coliseum...
not for a debates of the commons
but for the: throw the jaw of man
to the dog
and let's see who starts to YAP
first...

i'm very much sober i have a clear
work ethic
and the penultimate lap
of irritable bowel syndrome to cognitive
block: no day dreaming
i can't wait for Friday
and the tAylow Witch Swifty
come London
come all those siusiumajtki:
**** god no diacritical marks!

****-pre-periodic-miming-
street-project
16 year olds getting pregnant
fetching tents
to mountain climb: to climb a mountain
of ToyLord Swagger ITch swiftest...

by 11pm i have a half smoked
joint of: us: re-ready...
Addie: Adidas Edie...
your mother said what: again? first time
lapse in: escape of soul
with remnants of consciousness
as experience
combating the early child
and mind unison with consciousness
the exploring stage
then ego
clinging to an existence per se:
because the ego however
neurotic *** straved
psychotic
bilingual schizoid
6ft3 pacified
because best trip from warrior
to shaman
that was my trip
the heart was enlarged by misfeeding
me
the ****** to large for that kind of a ******
i was the Church of the Holy ******
the Dune's Bene Gesseritz...

      the best "*****" came from the Christian
Church of Hawaiian Reborns
some alternative to catholicism i could
nor would i have ever known...
but the best witches to my liking
came: come... an ongoing process:
come in Trinities...

pretend i have to wear a tux...
better:
short sleeve shirts
made in BANGADESH
BANGAFLESH
BANGLADESH!

     white: 100% $0.01
          coot! coot! cotton! cotton!
nothing synthetic like from China...

counter: no, just another:

¶) the above, initial thought: should have
started from here:

did i really read Madame Bovary by Flaubert?
well: you know what?
i think i have:
elite schooling i believe
but never a stand-up
gimmick
i'm saying this ego is not my consciousness
within life and with departure
this ego is a maniac
this ego needs Satanic Release
i'd be happy to swap egos
with anyone willing to swap egos
ego is like the metabolism of consciousness
a cognitive metabolism:
thoughts eating matter:
the talking mushrooms said
to the centipede citizen: hush hush in the multiverse
those monkey toys will have
but one exit: tome...
written by some *** talking monkey from
Poland who emigrated to Loondon
and thought he was this ancient hot *** of tool!
toll! the bells of Portugal
the bulls come parading!
not their horn: but their testicles!

           ю
           я
           шч
           щ

           ѭ                     (ją)

walked into a vinyl shop
on offer two books for £7
pickled up Chomsky
flicked to Slav vs. Slav
Yugoslavia
and the Soviet Union
the former Mongol Empire
China in talks with Russia
why the failure

then the steaming shift of **** stinking
brought in Western Individualist
promises:
i can't find nihilism in an individual
i can find nihilism in a people
i can conquer god and nothing
for the concern of the individual for Nietzshce
in that i will never find nihilism in an individual
man...
i will find, however...
however: i will find...
hedonism and hairspray on Mohicans...
** ** ** 20 20 20...

           i will not find nihilism in indivuals
with the exception of
Shiva and Loki and Set...
          i will not find it in individuals:
of the human specie...
hedonism, yes,
micro-scaling or macro-scaling...
who made these people supposedly literate
when they don't disseminate facts
but like religious docrtines
we have articulated nothing!
back to emoji hieroglyphs...
no help from the Sumerians
and the Golden Calf Crew plagiarized the word
through and through...
*** Yiddy *** ***: because of the Germanic
Jews the Polish Jews were
exterminated:
the German Jews didn't warn the Polish
Jews
and we're talking a: DIASPORA
not an Utopia
of Zion was the Utopia envisioned
in the currency (current) state of existence
of the state of Israel:
there was never a nation of...
oh: but there was a nation as a diaspora
that are the Hebrews...

but the Jews of Germany literally sent
their Polish Jews to the slaughterhouser
with their Weimar degenerate projection
and the rat not curious
emigrated to the USA first
and established Hollow Wood
and cryptic: the movement of people
is so cryptic: especially from Albania
on banana floating dingy...
yes.. very ******* perplexing
the movement of Jews
like that's why CCTV was invented
to track Jews!
we need to track Jews!

and yew trees... some hacked oaks...
some Sumerian numbers
some Chinese letters: not letters
some Japanese moans of: OH SAKURA SATO!
**** me: ***** stands on high command!
ha!

the idea like a flash
of replacing London with Tokyo
and not Kauai...
i found that what's being celebrated
is people with bad life decisions...
single mums with 4 kids
going to court over... **** knows what...
******* libido?

people don't know how to even engage
with a person who said:
life's difficult! let's have an easy path!
pesto! pasta! parmeggano cheese! let's go!
why i don't say have an east
life
so much luxury time should allow
your i.q. be matched
with having terrible in-grove hangovers
of melancholy...
but to have to add stress to the living
of feeding 3 children by an abusive **** buddy:
serious?!
do i want to work in that environment:
all my best guys ****** off
because that ergonomic shitshow of INBREEDING
ERGONOMIC ******
of working with the same people
for far too long that they
take on liberties of leeching
your free space...

philosophy of work begins with
Heidegger's hammer
and like Nietzsche: who rose to intellectual
prominence too quickly
the Hiroshima of Wagner...
boom!
        to philosophize about work
i don't think has ever been done
given that in 19th century works of philosophy
philosophers are asking the Narcissistic
envy of Black Holes:
philosophizing about nothing...

more clutter: some in books others in people's
consciousness:
nothing ego-friendly...
egos are infinitely bound to having no fixation
on individuality as part of the consciousness of
individuation:
some mistreat their egos
some salvage them: barely...
some become them as writers of fiction...
but egos are not exactly parts of us
depending how we can toy
or pet or understand or celebrate
or manage: like a fetus...

        not to be born yet still alive
and beyond life
like god in judgement beside us
to wake us from falling asleep to die...

I confess, no deliberate intent, yet often wonder
what spurs me to nudge, goad, coax, et cetera
semblance of reasonable poetic rhyme
despite modesty regarding
ably linkedin words for others to ponder
more often than not experiencing nonresponder,
nevertheless share mine writing
with folks cyberspace out yonder
or aliens occupying
beyond the pale of outer limits
amidst the twilight zone,
where dark shadows
looming near the edge of night
hint of spooky forebodings.

Without lofty literary ambitions,
more so stream
of consciousness abandonment,
yours truly rests content
to cobble, gamble, noodle... courtesy
swifty tailored stylishly harried element
mild mannered modest gent
bumbling along boulevard of
broken (po' whet) dreams intent
far less superman than Clark Kent

exercising mental cogs and wheels meant
merely to liberate momentary overconfident
zealous spontaneous inspiration,
albeit ordinarily quiescent
ex post facto concluding
equals time most salient
direct object lesson learned
lame, insipid, feeble resultant
effort generates undercurrent
aghast how rapid
(think lightspeed) went.

Yours truly his own worst critic ad aware
how avast mein kampf replete with bare
inducent to tap into latent fledgling clear
propensity to express creatively, I declare
bonafide potential to join pantheon excelsior
reserved for established authors within their
respective canon, genre, league...,
nonetheless an obvious flair
seemed evident perhaps coalesced
when in utero biological gear

yielded wiggly, ugly, scrawny,
quirky Harris heir
(sole son and second of three offspring)
an older and younger sister,
which introverted brother bullies
did constantly jeer
token scapegoat suffered
one after another kingly leer
pushing psychological state near
precipice off into dock side of moon,

who sought
(wharf far art grim reaper) to pier
without naked qualm evincing
one very bony rear
without sympathy merely spells severely
pockmarked psyche therefore
impossible mission to set tattered self esteem
tacked toward in opposite direct where
dark shadow of doubt doth not veer
me into apathetic, horrific, pathetic...
suicidal mental state of yesteryear.

i woke up, i slumbered into waking
and Muhammad's question of consciousness
while Gabriel ***** his ear
hello Taylor: the problem is me:
i can't imagine why all these journalist
would call you concerts safe spaces:
on the 16th of August i was sexually
harassed at your concert
by a bear-******:
i'm not homophobic but i was sexually
harassed by a bear-******:
IC1 or in North America it's called
a Caucasian:
thank you for disclosing that you:
i don't think the little girls heard you:
i think heard you
drinking wine
and talking to cats...
on the 20th of August, a.d.:
maybe you love christ maybe christ unites us all:
but i can't be the one ******* christ's
**** jesus no...
dutifully i collected your wristbands
from your little clone sisters:
clone me clone me
now i realize why women don't
want to reproduce with me:
if my mind were to spill into genes
and i were a great Khan
i would destroy this world with my
offspring
i with be: King Cain...
i would be the Khan Cain!
my father passed on the scarring
from rib to the shoulder blade:
the original story
of this little piggy went to the market:
we gave you people the apple
then we gave you
the bread and wine
i have only a shot of *****
with the added flick off a cigarette...
this is my blood: this is my body:
the blood is ***** and the body is ash...

i was going to write the sequence of
events as rat
of Wembley...
but i covered that: i already know about
where the good toilets are
at club Wembley by turnstile G
with Keith: doing the searching bags
oh so many tampons so many shampoo bottles
so many highlights...

now the thought is punching me:
why women fear to reproduce with me:
this Frankenstein i've become:
smooth over: horror:
originally Pinhead was a woman
and not a man
so Clive the Barking Mind was right:
to create a horror story with a woman:
and now, dear Taylor: your anti-hero
will make a reply and sow his seeds
of ego into the minds of the shadows
of these little girls:
i didn't feel safe: technically
i was sexually-harassed:
my 55 year old lover from Hawaii
clarified that point: so i raised it to a level
reporting it:
but let me tell you:
he told me everything...
he told me everything:
day later he was heading for the Copenhagen
Pride Parade...
he was working in the security industry
in America:
did the Adele with a $40,000 worth of stage:
logistics:
how men talk how men talk
and how covertly hiding the woman
in the humanism of homosexuality:
an understudy:
he felt welcome
i felt a tingle:
so wrong so BI
so BI so artistic i think we artists:
only for the posterity of the C.C.T.V magpie....
the C.C.T.V. magpie the trinity
now complete with ᚺᚢᚷᛁᚾᚾ

H Mn...

    hmm... Mandala of Mendeleyev... hydrogen
and Mn is? hmm... let me check...
Manganese...

   ring of origin: Magneto can't have children
in this universe of Z-men...
i'm a someone who didn't catch the gen-X vipe
someone said the Millennials
and
i came back from your concert
raising the dead
like the death i've become:

reading up on Tȟatȟáŋka Íyotake:
dear Nashville: dearest Lakota... says:
i don't really smoke in the grey haze of
afternoons: smoke smoke wink wink:
but i'm rarely this restless in the afternoon:
but i'm at work
and i need to write like i might be painting:
so i put on my sunglasses
and turn to the bulb of Beelzebub's glare
of pixel neon and strobe of adverts...
one go: all ensoo!
one go one go one stroke one life...

ghost dance movement:
i flew over America
and landed in Polynesia and didn't really
understand the golf courses
on such beautiful citadels
of islands...
i saw such horror: must imply
i was born 3 hours away from Warsaw:
and my Poland is like a liver
and my England is like my tongue
and my Hawaii is like my heart:
but... i can't be there...
come and go but never be
this forge of the forever neglect-          -ed...
accent, or signature: that little        +
well: before i became a Swifty
because Vienna was really challenging with
Islamic           XY... the challenge of a
monotheism with polygamy:
but polygamy can only work within
the confines of polytheism:

i knew i would unearth my deepest concerns
enough time would pass
and i would come to the conclusions
i made in conversation:
newest labor!
if i were in power and had scrutiny on
how humans behave:
i would go pass the tease-and-testament
of the English:
the thing the Latins would abhor
the pedantry of the Saxon-Gaelic no no:
no Anglo-Saxons: the Saxon-Gaelic model
of passing laws feeling guilty and rich
this incubator of innocent until proven guilty:
no! you are guilty until proven innocent!
get away with it this model
of the ring of pedohpiles and homos... insapiens....
i would like to call them retards
but RETARDS ARE PROGRESSIVES!

i'm drinking and the afternoon looks sickly real:
maybe your songs are sweet
but you are sweet
but the rainbow brigade is shuffling my ego
as the joker card among the hearts
and clubs...

she will still need someone to talk to:
i can stomach the 12h differences...
i can't raise her daughter: she won't let me:
Reyla is already her own person:
she's good at organizing people:
i hope she ends up managing the better aspect
of Lahui: ******* polynesian spelling:
too many vowels!

         Ła Ła...        Łu Łu...

they used to write: AŁŁAH: oh oh! hot fire!
it hurts...
because christ explored sexuality
i was asked while being "sexually harassed"
whether i was on any network...
i said hello.poetry
no instagram no no
                     how you just wish to connect
to someone to talk to
no necessarily to have a ****-a-bye-bye-baby...
anti-hero my new favorite song
anti-hero my new favorite song
that's why i'm still wearing the bangle...
boy rich
boy rich              i'm a rich boy
i don't want to leave London:
15th Sept i've been asked to do a private
super special family gathering at Wanstead
London and you Taylor:

17th August i was at a West Ham football
match: strict language... football match...
no: i could have been playing backgammon
because roll of dice
and no mind games with chess...
so much congestion and constipation
of psychology:
drunks dreaming of being lumberjacks
mind you:
question...

your t-shirt...
you're missing a letter...

     who's
     taylor swift
     anyway?
     EW
                            you forgot EUrope...

it's euw.
who?                   Taylor is Taylor is a Freudian tailor.
i wasn't a steward:
this was opera and i became an USHER...
i was an USHER with Scotland 1-on-1...
Glasgow and the story-teller:
ooh: grunch: let the serpent in:
the scared honey-suckle the Eve... well:
Lilith: when you have children you will
be Eve: until you have them
you're the story of Adam and Lilith:
there's Adam and Lilith before Lilith is immersed
in giving birth:
apple my sin of the fetus?
imagine... the fruit of our labors will be a child
and that's the best metaphor we have?
can i eat my child like an apple?
but it's you and me having a conversation
about parasites
and the child and your body...
and i spotted: TWINS X-MEN pregnant women
at your concert exposing the fetuses to
the deaf and sound of your voice...

Odin to Taylor direct:
i sent my son Thor to make your religious base
feel welcome:
the elders agreed we are tired:
there's no superficiality:
agreed...
                      
there is no serpent there is no fruit:
there's just the baby in the womb...
there is no serpent there is not fruit:
there's just the baby in the womb...

let's keep focus: please... please... pretty pretty...
cocktail of parrots...
cocktail of:
those parakeets originated
in Bishops' Park: Fulham:
by the Thames:
where the Omen movie was shot
and the priest was impaled:
lucky you Taylor: you dream about daughters:
i'm shackled to borrowed dreams via
movies...
now those parakeets are just a familiar
with the Essex skies:
maybe i didn't shift the Himalayas into the desert
of Sahara
but i'm pretty sure i moved a volcano
and shot it into the sky...

18th of August was just weird:
Sabbaths are weird:
but that's how Sabbaths begin:
i walked home around 11pm
maybe later...
yes: it was 1am:
i went into a pub
after planning it...
met Greg by chance
at a Foo Fighters gig...
then planned for weeks to meet up with
Alexander: the painter...
well: paint is hard to come by:
can't paint these days
just enough plastic and shark-of-plural...
haven't seen him in 10 years:
i just stormed out
after a drinking and smoking session
and i just stormed out because
i probably saw a way to live and
we could be friends but
as friends aside
and not some crab-bucket mentality:
LOCALS...

Taylor...
there was something else... but i knew this
would become of this poem
i would know what to write
but in the process of writing it
i would forget it
because i'm not a rubric man
and i leave that to your organisational:
typos, stipends... i actually don't have
a word since i already thought of letters
and the sound like EUW...

oh... now i remember:

          ᛗᚢᚾᛁᚾᚾ

some symbolism having to complicate matters
with mater
matter
                        unless that's just an evolutionary
complication of conversation that
there must be a distinction of adding chatter
and bounce to to too...

                  two nights with the blood moon
halved into a peanut butter cookie
while i kneeled:
i'm bear
i'm not ape
i understand homosexuality like
a bear
not like an Islamic and African ape...
i'm a bear-******
two bears meet up in a bar for teenage girls...
they sniff each other's ears...
teenage girls:
the ones i got sexually attracted to:
well...
i did...
so i thought: mmhmm: healthy child...
that's what i thought:
i've been to strip clubs i've been to brothels
so a Taylor Swift concert was
like having eye drops with dental framework
of keeping you semi-blind
half awake and what not...

but Taylor: i had to file it as ****** abuse:
i'm an artist: i think: i hope:
maybe i don't write in paragraphs and forget:
forget: **** it: let's suppose i forget
to forget to not forget to remember
that there was this sick
prudish English and in general
trend in poetry that was so anti Greek
that words had to rhyme:
like.... painting: colors rhyme?
rhyme and meter it's like i have to be this
poet-bouncer this Socrates
who is to take away the straitjacket of rhyming
and give poets the quality of philosophy
away from the inconclusive persuasions
of the oratory demand(s)....

"smog": there were about only
4 stars visible in the sky from 16th to the 18th...
August...
Augustus...

     and imagine i was coming back from
last night's concert with two star-*******
mega-jigs... colts:
i've seen trainspotters...
weirdos... so obvious... but... NECESSARY...
absolutely... NECESSARY...
but these two colt Newtons were almost
exhilarating: listening to them talk about
getting drunk and lying back
grappling with understanding the mysticism
of the whole affair:
because they are scientifically bound
and were trying to compound
and turn science into mysticism
putting it apart is science
putting it back together is mysticism
and mysticism is not something
religiously-exclusive:
religion and the texts are defunct:
new mysticism arrived from
what needs to be filtered: via the new Pandora
that has always been Faust...

so i found a new route out of Wembley
after a shift...
i used to just stick to the right
and behave like a river against the sea of people
queuing...
but i start to dance while walking
through a crowd: ***** fast fast...
i dance there's no queue there's just a throng splinter
but you can find access on the sides
like a river and serpent
but not like a wave of people in the bad abstract
of a street...
that sea of whirls of the globe...
regardless: i feel like a ***** in an *******
into a woman i love
about to say hello to little moi...
weird thinking:
bear-******...

                it just felt authentic like two bearded men
rather than... oh... i can only imagine:
the mental asylum was not short:
but there are gay men who must discriminate
against the outlying... ooh.... itchy thinking...
itchy thinking: like a fear of ants...
but a love for spiders...
but you never see spiders feeding off ants...
so confused confusing...
then again that's a boost
for the narrative...

         i will find myself sooner dead writing
at night rather than dealing with daylight
deadlines...
hmm...
   apple... bread and wine...
   shot of ***** and a flick of cigarette ash...
o.k.
i can work with that: i'm currently seeing
where i'm at...
science and mysticism
science: putting things apart
modern mysticism is anti-related to
anything equivalent to Gnosticism
and Sufism...
current mysticism doesn't even exist:
it's in in infancy...
i don't have a noun for it...
i don't have a name for it...
like the verb and there's the doing...
noun: naming
verb: doing...
                                        being? it's not a noun...
it's also a verb...
star-gazers and educated too! they mentioned
grammatical words in conversation...
my kind of interest matter:
obviously left to their own devices
and they don't need my: influence:
they might reach 80 and find my poems
and wow: what a time-capsule
and a Erinnerung-Blitzkrieg!

                when thought: when thinking is a muddle...
Erinnerung-Blitzkrieg!