"pantomimed" poems
the body falls soft
curves collapsing on the edge of
bedspread tangled in cliched prison
escape ropes
tied loose like old tendon,
we are all but used.
I feel the force of Fibonacci
spiraling between ribs
and pelvis, golden ratios
divining skin,
1 to 1.616
Jul 5, 2013
Jul 5, 2013 at 8:09 PM UTC
We can escape, now,
it's smoky with a chance of curtain drawn,
our minds won't tramsit light
from our empty, covered windo- the train is here.
I'm ready to go.
And though I'm leaving on a train
with room for only one,
I'm hoping you can catch a cheap ride
hidden in my pocket.
Nobody checks your person, anymore,
Nobody cares;
Homeland Security lovingly fed
us fattened falsities
As the fat cats in suburban alleyways
tore off the thickest
pieces of marrow from the national animal
of our Fiction States of America.
I have known this
because I have seen it from my seat
in coach,
thank god, too, because the train is packed.
So fill up
if you aren't going to hop in,
wishing to distort
your mind with all of their public drugs,
community opiates
transmitting across electrical wires hidden
in the ground,
the trees,
the air itself,
stitched into the layers of
dark matter and cosmic foam insulating
our fragile and overdone Universe.
I hear their static,
that pantomimed reality,
caught inside carbon fibers running through everything,
running through me,
running through you,
running into and out of your brain like
a thief without pause or moral.
We could run, too,
the heavy bass notes of the
nurturing ocean could shield the screech
of the battered train's wheels;
the wheels need a rest from screeching, anyway.
Quick!
While the conductor isn't looking!
The wires will tell him you're here
until you're gone,
hidden in my coat pocket
inside a layer of my inner smoke.
Well, if you insist,
I suppose you may leave,
but once the wound of knowledge opens,
just know it never closes.
It will fester and
prickle
with the fetid odor
of truths turned into lies.
I know I'm talking
to myself, now, but I don't
want to let you go,
though I'll stay here,
safe,
in the train carriage,
hidden in smoke.
Smoke,
smoke,
smoke,
the train heats up,
breaths out smoke from its burning
and throbbing pipe.
The engine has built up
an overdose of heat,
trying to throw off the weeds trying
to grow inside.
They tried to enter me,
and they will soon enter you,
now,
without my smoke to shroud you,
to leave your naked wound
easily hidden in
paranoid dreams.
Screeeeee,
screeeeeee,
screeeeeeee,
the wheels screech out,
ready to go,
ready to run,
to run down the track,
to run through all obstacles,
to run through everything,
to run through me,
to run through you,
to run in and out of your brain,
blown away in a puff of smoke,
my memory has burned away
and blows off as ash
and smoke.
Feb 6, 2011
Feb 6, 2011 at 7:32 PM UTC
Lucky.
Some people would look at this little life of Grace and think, **** she is lucky. Of course, you know better, don't you, Wonderland? You know what goes on in my hodge-podge head where the rainbows lament and the killers dance.
So come and tell me what my kiss tastes like. I want to know if the poison is evident or I'm just the one who can feel it.
Skeletons twirl on my walls, and that's not a metaphor. I literally have neon skeletons dancing on my walls. That's just the type of person I am.
No where. That's where we're going right now, with wonderful gibberings of a lost cockatoo, so lost she found herself in a young woman's body.
Lost little Grace, trying to find her place in the world, just like her beloved Alice. Yet Alice was always free of Wonderland at the end of the night. Or was she? She did always gravitate towards the insane place, maybe she's just as trapped as Grace.
Musings of the world as I grow, from young little wide-eyed girl to the woman I am today. A young woman, albeit, a naive, wide-eyed woman with too much hope in her heart, but a woman nonetheless.
The scars of your love leave me breathless. Oh no, no they don't. I hope mine have left you dead.
Still bitter I am how my caterpillar betrayed me. Have I not told this story? How in the dark of the night he found solace in the wings of another, to leave me blind to his deception. Thank the gods the March Hare had the sense to enlighten me.
Now I spend my nights in the arms of other, and I could not be happier. Never one solid man, never one stationary enough to become a character of Wonderland. But there enough so the loneliness does not creep up on me in the waking hours of the moon.
Stars are my companions now, yes, that's what they are. I am always stargazing and sometimes, when I'm lucky, I share my pantomimed sleep with them, pantomimed for of course I do not sleep.
So perhaps I am lucky, for I am a Grace surrounded by stars, and at the moment, I would not have it any other way.
Sep 26, 2014
Sep 26, 2014 at 12:49 PM UTC
One almost tore away my wall
One almost said he chooses me
Another almost made me fall
One almost finally set me free
But almost only counts
in horseshoes and hand grenades
Fool's gold has luster
and sweet are borrowed serenades
You can't call it love
I'll call your bluff
because almost is only almost
and that's not enough
A roller coaster only climbing
missing the train by a minute's timing
A frozen bud in a snap of cold
An unfinished novel, story untold
A sentence fragment
A muddled accent
A pantomimed kiss
A swing and a miss
A pencil sketch
A warm up stretch
A suspended chord
A ringless lord
A lightning bolt, no rain or thunder
A child at play, no sense of wonder
Almost only counts
in horseshoes and hand grenades
Fool's gold has luster
and sweet are borrowed serenades
You can't call it love
I'll call your bluff
because almost is only almost
and that's not enough
I almost love you too
I almost let you in
I almost wish I was the one
I can almost begin again
And even if the words only almost rhyme
I only almost care by the end of the lines
While I could almost forget, in truth I find
that I will always remember how you were almost mine
Apr 17, 2016
Apr 17, 2016 at 5:27 PM UTC
Coated in moonlight I take in your scent
The taste is sweet but the high is oppressive
My mind is haunted by the hollow embrace of your gaze
Swinging from hit to hit, always unbalanced
Your energy fuels my high and for a moment it all feels real
I want to stay in that feeling, building a log cabin in it’s lakeside shores
But far too soon I will be alone and realize my clock is bleeding
Last night’s residue lingers, the cold air tastes of honey and all at once I feel the need to *****
Struggling to accept my addiction, I say “I need to leave” as I relapse into your body
When you are away I am haunted by your pantomimed withdrawal.
I choke on the loss of productivity
High on you I feel sedentary in a galaxy of movement
Our finale, a supernova of light and lust shatters to drift alone and cold
I leave you behind, feeling a hunger to find a new drug with a different name
May 6, 2021
May 6, 2021 at 12:08 AM UTC
I hate them, they’re everywhere
with their painted on smiles
Behind your back,
they probably stab and despise
knowing how to stir up hate and lies
Apparently they make good bosses
but if you know one, avoid, cut your losses
They have no conscience or empathy,
their emotions are pantomimed not real
Remember, they don’t have to make
a bloodbath
to be a psychopath
Sep 13, 2014
Sep 13, 2014 at 8:46 PM UTC
passages and pathways proliferate the minds
of young men and women wondering too big.
it is strange how there are hidden rooms within the fabric of a brain,
how the web weaves itself wondrously among all the fibers and frequencies
of thought.
though subtle might the message be,
brave in thought and clear in word,
harder it might be to see
with vision that always blurs.
it is certainly strange how
the brain builds itself over time
and becomes the face and
the object pantomimed.
act well,
act loudly,
act brilliantly brash,
even though we all will perish
and we all will turn to
ash.
it is just so very strange how
some words are far too similar
even though the meaning may not be so.
and I wonder how it is to wander
in the wonderings of a wandering mind;
we are wondering far too big
for such small,
squishy minds.
don't be frightened, but,
we might be out of time.
Dec 31, 2012
Dec 31, 2012 at 5:05 AM UTC
Destroy the idea that I am perfect
Because by **** I am anything but
I am the epitome of a Trojan horse
I'll win you over with my understanding nods
I'll say things too loudly, and you'll think
"This level of ridiculousness must be trusted"
DO NOT TRUST ME
Please oh please protect yourself
I will destroy you
I won't mean to, but I will
I will be the train and you'll let yourself walk on the tracks
Loving the aesthetic
I will try to stop when I realize what is happening
But you will be flattened nonetheless
I will ask myself how you did not see
I will wonder how you could have even gotten on the tracks
I will remember putting up warning signs
"I love me some strong men" I said
*"Love me some **** I said
I pantomimed blowing a dude
And checked out the guy jogging
Still you were on the tracks
And I will know that it was my fault
Somehow, somewhere along the line, I was ambiguous
Because I'm always ambiguous
Because I can't stand the thought of someone being hurt by me
And I think that if I remain shielded by ambiguity
Maybe everyone can win
I will stay alone
But everyone else will be happy
It never works out
**I always **** up**
And someone gets hurt
They asked why I punched the wall
Why I let my knuckles bleed and drip on my shoes
I love those shoes
But I led you on
And I deserve to be punished
No one will understand, because I am a Trojan horse
I have won them over with my understanding nods
I punch the wall, wishing you were punching me
Taking payment for my ****** actions
Do not be ambiguous with your pain
Transfer it to me
Let me shoulder your burden, because I would rather be miserable
Than believe for a moment that someone is miserable because of me
I am barely a man, more of a boy, really
We are a dime a dozen
And my kind are ********
We are not worth much
And I need you to realize
That I am ****
Jan 14, 2015
Jan 14, 2015 at 3:22 AM UTC
I feel it
the pantomimed
joke of
my affection.
Grinding hips
like clenched
teeth
when the nightmares sing.
Through the haze
of absurdity
I wonder:
is this
love too?
Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 3:51 PM UTC