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Vladimir Lionter May 2020
I
Colonel Zaev(1), our commander,
Lived seventeen years in Angolian land.
There are no Luanda’s(2) experts better
Than him- he met its ambassadors two hundred
Times. He smashed UNITA(3) and weakened SAR’s (4)
Power. He supported Fidel Castro(5)
And he became famous for counter-attacks.
The Angolians call him Victor-Pastor:
He does always set the young on the right path:
Aoi!

II
Roberto Holden6 was the foe of Neto
He was a monarcho-tribolist.
And he happened to declare vendetta
To foes. His aim’s to banish socialists.
He invited China’s instructors to teach his
Soldiers the skill of fighting retreating under
Kifangondo(7), he’d not swiftly yield positions
Colonel Callan(8) retreated farther
With him. He was a cruel and fearless
Rascal, he was good at arranging ambush in
Woods. He fought hand-to-hand many times
But he was taken prisoner by the Guard
He declared political indifference but the court
To his grief didn’t believe him so that
Then he was quickly and publicly shot.
Aoi!

III
Savimbi Jonas(9) continued that war
Robin Holden quitted his Motherland –
It’s hard to revise views. What’s to be done for
Tearing a half away for his Fatherland?
He went to America, got a Baptist,
As preacher – he was the lost’s lecturer.
He didn’t wish just to be a pessimist
He wanted to live till times more fair.
Savimbi Jonas founded UNITA –
He made up his mind to go underground
MPLA’s detachments were defeated
By the Cubans but they were free quite
For diversions in the city. A new spiral
Of resistance began – two ideologies’
Confrontation took place and in final
It did cost life to many people for this.
Aoi!

IV
Our Victor Zaev, the commander
Of marines often trained us tirelessly
And all of us were not up to laughter
In gas-masks. We loaded incessantly
Our guns, we crossed the equator, anyway
In a moment Poseidon glorifying
By recompense. We stuck to the right fairway,
Neptun’s Day(10) became a great undertaking.
Aoi!

V
Coming to Luanda was usual rather,
The port’s scenery was bright, beautiful.
“Well, beauty!” exclaimed Igor, a warrant officer,
Zaev added: “It’s, brothers, very wonderful!”
Our councilor climbed up a deck as
Head of the Soviet military legation
He tried to explain the situation to us
Continuous seemed to be his Head’s duration.
Then the Cubans’ crew met us, their commander,
Did happen to know Russian at his fingers’
End. He valued the bearing of our landing
Force. And he was called Francisco Ortis.
Aoi!

VI
Here Agostino Neto came with
His suite consisting of twelve grandees
The President was cordial and gay. This
Day was marvellously fine, in his
Speech he praised the ******’s guard arranged
To meet him. He’d not fail to give his regiment
For it. “What an array!” admired said
Antonio. And at this moment
Tanks floated forward out of the hold
To display Agostino manoeures
Antonio began to sweat: old
Allies can always surprise friends, of course.
The Angolians were invited to dinner
And contented officials were standing
But “No!” was Neto’s serious answer,
“We should return for the fight’s resuming!”
Aoi!

VII
We reached Kanton on cruisers. A warrant
Officer cried: “Sound urgently bells”
The Angolians didn’t let us on to the port,
We anchored no outer roads. What was else?
Mattheu Kureku visited us then.
The President of far mountains of Benin,
And we’d appreciate his being of those men
Who were as modest as Ibn- Sina.
We displayed him gifts and even more
Than we wanted: hand- to- hand fight,
The landing force’s landing to the shore.
Mattheu said us his warm good- bye after that.
Aoi!

VIII
Soon we headed for Luanda, how
Long an action had been fought in its suburbs
And suddenly we saw a fishing scow
Six fisher- men were rowing in the ocean’s
Water catching the sight of us they began
To row faster knots increasing as
If punishment waited them but the race did happen
To be transitory. But cruisors’ powers
Are not boats’ powers equal and at last
We caught them, their fish fell to our lot.
The fish’ reserves were enough for a month.
We said with thankfulness: “Thank you a lot!”
The meeting was pleasant for them and us.
Aoi!

IX
Suddenly came order of the day:
To bring in an identification prisoner. Stas
A secrete service man, volunteered. Anyway,
His own fist was of the bull’s head’s size.
And Grigory, head naval petty officer
Then did volunteer to follow Stas.
“Well, who is else?” were the sailors asked after
It. Silence. It’s better to live on deck. At last,
Watching this the captain himself intervened
In it. His bas was heard even in far hold: “Oh,
You, cowards, I’ll feed you to whales, mind it!”
And phrases were not necessary any more.
Thus six more sailors gathered together – they were
Superheroes as if they were handpicked
The detachment of sound, strong men. Chernomor
Himself would take them so quick-witted.
There are not more safe people in the fleet,
There were not, there won’t be, indeed!
Aoi!

X
Here the scouts came down from the deck and they
All went so deep into a foreign land
A hundred verst’s was their sailing away
From the port. Ships from their Motherland
Were seen. Their commander
was the major lieutenant
And he said: “Motherland is calling us!”
In the fleet he was just called Kostya Brandt –
He did lead the scouts bravely forwards!
Aoi!

XI
The detachment marched into woods being dense,
The jungle were rustling around Luanda. It
Was raining cats and dogs, there was entrance
There, there was no exit for retreat!
They covered their necessary ten versts
More on that day they heard their foes’ voices.
They thought: it’s, perhaps, one of hostile posts.
A good luck attended them! The members
Of UNITA waited for them ahead
Savimba knew of Brandt’s group so dare –
Devil. He was warned by an Angolian friend,
The general had friends everywhere.
Aoi!

XII
Even Kostya Brandt didn’t know it
And he led his vanguard through a marshy path
Sailors were like brothers in the detachment.
Everybody was ready to sacrifice
Himself! And suddenly they saw in front:
Tents standing in forty meters from them and
And something went pit- a pat in Kostya Brandt
And he stretched his hand to a pistol hard.
They stole up to the last one, went into it:
It was empty, there were only playing- cards
There: and perhaps it seemed to them far, indeed?
On the ground there were three machine-guns.
Aoi!

XIII
Meanwhile Savimbi Jonas gathered troops
And he made such a speech when warriors gathered
Together: “We’ll die for freedom as heroes
We do not want another Motherland!
We will repulse all the Cuban occupants
We’ve recently sacked all the colonists!
The Soviet landing force’s scouts
Are going here. Near are the communists!
We’ll organize ambush for them behind the tent –
I’m sure they will go into it a at once.
I was informed that there are less than ten
Of them. We’ll **** the foes at once
We’ ll win because there are much more of us”
And selecting one hundred and forty men,
The strongest ones, Savimbi encircled the scouts.
Aoi!

XIV
“Well, that’s all, forward”, Kostya said strictly
The tent’s bed- curtains having half- opened
By his hand. But suddenly he was slightly
Taken aback- he saw foes get in his road
And he did cry: “We shall die for Russia-
Not disgracing ancestors or the Motherland!”
He stepped forward like a sent messia
He had no right to run away like a coward.
Aoi!

XV
Ours defended each other by backs hard
The battle was hot as it was hand- to- hand.
Two sides’ supporters did not know fright
This region was home for the partisans. And
Brandt fought as an ancient lion Neimeyan –
No pistols’ bullets could reach him at all.
He was a mighty, stately warrior European –
UNITA’s terror and poets’ idol!
The partisans had also a strong warrior –
He was called Manuel by Luanda’s citizens
When hunting he became a hero of yore –
He could hit varios marks without miss.
He took aim at the lieutenant’s back so that
A sharp bullet could pierce his heart. He pressed
The sear. And it did hurt Konstantin and
Shroud overshadowed his consciousness
And a celestial disk burning low, meciless
It’s opening a picture before his eyes:
His own mother’s meeting him and he is
Whispering her: “Mum, I’m going to the skies ”
And fell onto the ground Kostya breathless:
People’s blood was shed as the river around
But ours fought desiring nevertheless
To be gone with foes in the palace. Wounded
Stas’ll hit and three of them’ll fall without
Life’s signs. When he hits on the right–eight
Of them’ll fall at once although there are a few
Epic heroes all of them are heroes dead.
The dead can’t be responsible anew.
Aoi!

XVI
They all were dead. There were
three times more foes
Ours and UNITA collected the dead.
And that very day happened to be worth
A week. Bitter news of blood that was shed
Killed us. Our ship was anchored for five days more
We covered Cuban troops from the sea there.
On the sixth day we sailed from the shore,
Painful grief left an after- taste in their
Mouths. And Victor Zaev, our bold
Colonel, was silent in painful sadness,
He had done the last deed for the dead of old.
He presented them with rewards: “For service”
Putting them on each of coffins. All the ******
Were standing being in their low spirits.
Aoi!

XVII
Thus the song of Luanda came to an end
We paid our duty to military Motherland.
We’d drawn up and the commander said:
“Fine fellows! I wish your life to be quiet!”
Then he sailed not a little, I must say.
He waged war in seven companies. “Glory!”
Cry we to him in Navy Day today.
That is the end of the Luandian story.
Aoi!
The Civil war in Angola represented armed confrontation between
quarelling with each other groups: MPLA (People’s movement for
Angola’s liberation, the Labour’s Party), (port.Movimento Popular de
Liberaçao de Angola- Partido de Trabajo, MPLA), UNITA (port. Uniao
Nacional para a Independencia, Total de Angola, UNITA). The war began
in 1975.
1.Victor Zaev is the main hero of the given poetical work, he is an
invented personage;
2. Luanda (port. Luanda)- Angola’s capital;
3. UNITA – see above;
4. SAR – South African Republic;
5. Fidel Castro – Fidel Alejandro Castro Rus; he was born in August,
13, 1926; Biran, province Oriente , Cuba. He’s a Cuban revolutionary,
party and political figure, Chairman of Ministers’ Council and Chairman
of the State Council of Cuba (president) in 1959- 2008 and 1976- 2008.
6. Roberto Holden- Holden Alvaro Alberto (port. Holden Roberto;
January, 12, 1923, Mbanza- Kongo(its former name is San- Salvadordu- Kongo)- August,2, 2007, Luanda). He was also Jose Gilmore, an Angolian founder and many- year leader of the National Liberation’s Front (FNLA). An active participant of the war for Independence and of the Civil war in Angola. He’s a conservative monarcho-tribolist, anticommunist.
He was a member of the Angolian Parliament.
7. “…under Kirfangongondo…” – this battle was from October, 23
until November,10, 1975 in Angola. It was the first common victory of MPLA and the Cubans.
8. the colonel Kallen… – he is also “colonel Callan, a British service
man, corporal of parachute troops’ regiment’s corporal.” He’s an ethnic
Greek and Cypriot (Greek. Kώozaç Γιώργιoν). He’s a participant of the
Angolian’s Civil war, on FNLA’s side. He was executed according to the
court’s sentence in Luanda, on July,10, 1976.
9. Savimbi Jonas Maiheiro, (August, 3, 1934- February, 22, 2002),
an Angolian political and military figure, a partisan leader, the rebel
movement’s founder and the political Party UNITA’s founder from
March,13, 1966 to February, 22, 2002. He was an active participant of the
Angolian war for independence and of the Civil war. He was candidate
for President in Angolian elections in 1992. He was a prominent figure
of Cold War and world anti- communist movement.
10 Neptun’s Day-Nepptun’s holiday, sometimes it’s called “Neptun’s
Day”. It’s a water show. Sailors founded this tradition after their crossing
of the equator.

{2018}


ПЕСНЬ
I
Наш командир – полковник Виктор Заев(1)
Семнадцать лет прожил в стране Ангольской.
Страну Луанду(2) он отлично знает –
Встречал раз двести местное посольство.
Разбил УНИТА(3) и ЮАР(4) ослабил,
Поддержку оказал Фиделю Кастро(5)
В контратаках. И себя прославил.
Зовут его ангольцы Виктор-Пастор:
Он молодых советом наставляет.
Аой!

II
Роберто Холден(6) был врагом для Нето –
По убеждению – монархо-трайболистом.
И объявил противникам вендетту,
Поставив цель – изгнать социалистов.
Он пригласил инструкторов Китая
Учить своих солдат уменью драться.
Под Кифангондо(7) в битве отступая,
Он не хотел стремительно сдаваться.
С ним отступал назад полковник Каллэн(8) –
Головорез жестокий, но бесстрашный.
Засады ставил он в лесах умело,
Не раз бывал и лично в рукопашной.
Но был пленён он гвардией. И вскоре
Всем заявил свою аполитичность.
Но не поверил суд ему на горе –
Он был расстрелян быстро и публично.
Аой!

III
Савимби Жонаш(9) ту войну продолжил,
Роберто Холден родину покинул –
Переосмыслить взгляды очень сложно:
Как оторвать Отчизне половину?
В Америку уехал, стал баптистом,
Как проповедник – лектором заблудших.
Он не желал быть просто пессимистом
И до времён хотел дожить до лучших.
Савимби Жонаш основал УНИТА –
Борьбу свою он перевёл в подполье:
Отряды МПЛА кубинцами разбиты,
Но для диверсий в городах – раздолье.
Второй виток пошёл сопротивленья –
Противоборства двух идеологий.
И жизнями платило населенье –
Война тогда коснулась очень многих.
Аой!

IV
Наш Виктор Заев – командир морпехов -
Тренировал нас часто, неустанно:
В противогазах было не до смеха -
Мы заряжали пушки беспрестанно.
Пересекли в один момент экватор,
Прославив Посейдона воздаяньем,
Наш путь лежал на правильный фарватер.
Нептуна день (10) – большое начинанье!
Аой!

V
Приход в Луанду очень был обычным,
Пейзаж портовый – яркий и прекрасный.
«Ну, лепота!» - воскрикнул Игорь-мичман.
Добавил Заев: «Это, братья, классно!»
На палубу советник наш поднялся –
Глава советской миссии военной.
Он обстановку дать нам постарался,
Поскольку был там, кажется, бессменно.
Затем кубинцев встретила команда –
Их командир знал русский в идеале.
Он оценил всю выправку десанта –
Франсиско Ортис команданте звали.
Аой!

VI
Вот Агостиньо Нето подошёл
Со свитою двенадцати вельмож.
Был Президент приветлив и весёл,
И день был удивительно хорош!
Он похвалил матросский караул,
Поставленный наверх его встречать.
«За них бы полк отдать не преминул, –
Антонио сказал, – вот это рать!»
Из трюма танки выплыли вперёд –
Маневры Агостиньо показать.
Антонио пробил холодный пот:
Союзники умеют удивлять!
Ангольцев пригласили на обед –
Чиновники довольные стоят.
Но Нето отвечал серьёзно: «– Нет,
Нам возвращаться надобно назад!»
Аой!

VII
На крейсерах в Катону мы приплыли
И крикнул мичман: «Склянки срочно бейте!»
Но в порт ангольцы нас не пропустили –
На якорь встали мы на внешнем рейде.
Затем нас посетил Матье Куреку –
Сам Президент из дальних гор Бенина –
Заметим в дань ему как человеку –
Он скромен был как мудрый Ибн Сина.
Ему мы показали все таланты –
И даже больше, чем хотели сами:
Бой рукопашный, высадку десанта.
Матье тогда тепло прощался с нами.
Аой!

VIII
И взяли курс мы снова на Луанду –
Велись бои давно в её предместьях.
Вдруг видим мы рыбацкие шаланды –
По океану плыло ровно шесть их.
Завидев нас, они быстрей поплыли,
Узлов прибавив, будто ждёт их кара!
Не долгими, однако, гонки были.
Любая лодка крейсеру не пара!
Догнали их. И нам досталась рыба –
Запасов тех на месяцы хватило.
Сказали мы признательно: «Спасибо!»
И после встречи всем приятно было!
Аой!

IX
Нежданно вдруг пришёл такой приказ:
Любой ценой доставить языка.
Тут вызвался морской разведчик Стас –
Его кулак был с голову быка.
И главный корабельный старшина
Григорий захотел идти за ним.
– «Ну, кто ещё?» – спросили. Тишина.
Уж лучше быть на палубе живым.
Тогда вмешался лично капитан –
Был даже в дальнем трюме слышен бас:
– «Ну, трусы! Всех скормлю сейчас китам!»
И больше не понадобилось фраз.
Так набралось ещё шесть моряков –
Супергерои – все как на подбор –
Отряд здоровых, крепких мужиков.
Их взял бы даже Дядька-Черномор!
Надёжнее людей на флоте нет
И не было, не будет и вовек!
Ушло в разведку восемь человек.
Аой!

X
Вот с палубы разведчики сошли
И углубились в даль чужой земли.
На сотню вёрст от порта отошли –
Уж не видать родные корабли.
Руководил всем старший лейтенант.
И молвил он: «Нас Родина зовёт!»
Его на флоте звали Костя Брандт –
Он храбро вёл разведчиков вперёд!
Аой!

XI
Отряд вступил в дремучие леса –
Вокруг Луанды джунгли шелестят.
Льют воду каждый день тут небеса –
Зашёл туда и нет пути назад!
Прошли они ещё десяток вёрст,
Услышали чужие голоса.
Подумали: возможно, вражий пост –
Счастливая настала полоса!
Унитовцы их ждали впереди.
О группе Брандта сам Савимби знал –
Его ангольский друг предупредил:
Имел везде знакомых генерал.
Аой!

XII
Сего не ведал даже Костя Брандт
И вёл отряд болотистой тропой.
Любой матрос в отряде был как брат.
Готовы все пожертвовать собой!
И вдруг увидел каждый впереди:
Стоят палатки метрах в сорока.
У Кости что-то ёкает в груди
И к пистолету тянется рука.
Подкрались к крайней и в неё зашли:
В палатке пусто, карты на столе –
А может, померещилось вдали?
Три автомата было на земле.
Аой!

XIII
Меж тем собрал Савимби Жонаш войско
И речь сказал собравшимся такую:
– «Мы за свободу все умрём геройски,
Ведь не желаем родину другую!
Дадим отпор кубинским оккупантам –
Прогнали ведь недавно колонистов!
Разведчики советского десанта
Идут сюда. Уж близко коммунисты!
Устроим им засаду за палаткой –
Они войдут в неё, уверен, сразу.
Мне донесли: их менее десятка.
Возьмём числом: врагов положим разом!»
И отобрав сто сорок самых сильных,
Пошёл Савимби окружать разведку.
Аой!

XIV
«– Ну, всё, выходим!» – Костя молвил строго,
Палатки полог приоткрыв рукою.
Но только вдруг... опешил он немного,
Когда врагов увидел пред собою.
И закричал: «Умрём же за Россию –
Не посрамим и предков, и державу!»
Шагнул вперёд, как посланный миссия –
Он не имел бежать позорно право.
Аой!

XV
Стояли наши все спиной друг к другу,
Был жаркий бой, поскольку рукопашный.
Из двух сторон никто не знал испуга –
Для партизан был этот край домашним.
И бился Брандт как древний лев немейский –
Его не брали пули пистолетов!
Могуч и статен воин европейский –
Гроза УНИТА и кумир поэтов!
У партизан был тоже сильный воин –
Его луандцы звали Мануэлем.
Он на охоте сделался героем –
Без промаха стрелял по разным целям.
Прицелился он лейтенанту в спину,
Чтоб сердце пуля острая пробила.
Нажал на спуск. И больно Константину,
И пелена сознание затмила.
И тут картину взору открывает
Небесный диск, на небе догорая:
Родная мать с войны его встречает,
А он ей шепчет: «Мама, умираю…»
Упал на землю Костя бездыханно:
Людская кровь лилась вокруг рекою.
Но бились наши – было им желанно
Нести в чертог жизнь вражью за собою.
Изранен Стас: ударит – лягут трое,
Направо стукнет – лягут сразу восемь.
Богатырей хоть мало, все – герои
Погибшие. А с мёртвых долг не спросят.
Аой!

XVI
Все полегли. Врагов – в три раза больше.
Забрали павших наши и УНИТА.
И день тот был иной недели дольше.
Мы были горькой новостью убиты.
Ещё пять дней на якоре стояли –
Мы части Кубы прикрывали с моря.
На день шестой под вечер отплывали –
Осадок был от тягостного горя.
И Виктор Заев, наш полковник смелый,
Молчал угрюмо в тягостной печали.
Последнее для павших сделал дело –
Он «За отвагу» им вручил медали.
На каждый гроб он положил награду –
Все моряки в унынии стояли.
Аой!

XVII
Так завершилась песня о Луанде.
Отдали долг мы воинский Отчизне.
Наш командир сказал тогда команде:
– «Вы молодцы! Желаю мирной жизни!»
Он по морям потом немало плавал.
И воевал ещё в семи кампаньях.
В день ВМФ кричим ему мы: «Слава!» –
На том конец Луандского сказанья!
Аой!
{31.12.2015}

Гражданская война в Анголе представляла собой вооружён-
ное противостояние между враждующими группировками: МПЛА (Народное движение за освобождение Анголы – Партия труда (порт. Movimento Popular de Libertação de Angola — Partido doTrabalho, MPLA), ФНЛА (порт. Frente Nacional de Libertação de Angola,
FNLA) и УНИТА (порт. União Nacional para a Independência
Total de Angola, UNITA). Война началась в 1975 году, а завершилась
в 2002 году.
1. Виктор Заев – главный герой данного поэтического произве-
дения, вымышленный персонаж;
2. Луанда (порт. Luanda) – столица Анголы;
3. УНИТА – см. выше;
4. ЮАР – Южно-Африканская республика
5. Фидель Кастро – Фиде́ль Алеха́ндро Ка́стро Рус (исп. Fidel
Alejandro Castro Ruz; род. 13 августа1926; Биран, провинция Орьенте, Куба) – кубинский революционер, государственный, политический и партийный деятель, который являлся Председателем Совета министров и Председателем Государственного совета Кубы (президентом) в 1959 – 2008 и 1976 – 2008 годах.
6. Роберто Холден – Холден Альваро Робер-
то (порт. Holden Roberto; 12 января 1923, Мбанза-Кон-
го (тогдашнее название – Сан-Сальвадор-ду-Конго) –
2 августа 2007, Луанда), он же Жозе Жилмор (порт.José Gilmore)
– ангольский политик, основатель и многолетний лидер Национального фронта освобождения Анголы (ФНЛА). Активный участник войны за независимость и гражданской войны в Анголе. Консерватор, монархо-трайбалист, антикоммунист. В 1992 – 2007 годах– депутат парламента Анголы.
7. «…под Кифангондо в битве…» – это битва при Кифангондо,
которая произошла с 23 октября по 10 ноября 1975 г. в Анголе и стала первой совместной победой МПЛА и кубинцев.

8. «…полковник Каллэн» – настоящее имя Костас Ге-
оргиу (греч. Κώστας Γιώργιου, англ. Kostas Giorgiou; 1951 –
1976), он же «Полковник Каллэн», Colonel Callan – британский военный, капрал парашютно-десантного полка. Этнический грек-киприот. Наёмный участник гражданской войны в Анголе на стороне ФНЛА. Казнён по приговору суда в Луанде 10 июля 1976 года.
9. Савимби Жонаш – Жо́наш Малье́йру Сави́мби (порт. Jonas
Malheiro Savimbi; 3 августа 1934 – 22 февраля 2002) – ангольский политический и военный деятель, партизанский лидер, основатель повстанческого движения и политической партии УНИТА. Лидер УНИТА c 13 марта 1966 по 22 февраля 2002. Активный участник ангольской войны за независимость и гражданской войны. Кандидат в президенты Анголы на выборах 1992. Видный деятель Холодной
войны и мирового антикоммунистического движения.
10. «Нептуна день…» – Праздник Нептуна, иногда –
«День Нептуна». Водное представление. Берёт основы от тради-
ции моряков при пересечении экватора.

Translator - I. Toporov
louis rams Jan 2013
she was hooked on drugs part of her life
but has a son to help her fight
in life we never know the road we may take
but changing the course is never too late.

he had taken the same road as she
main lining and pills was all he could see
addiction is a hard price to pay
but something happened that changed his way.

I know the lifestyle all too well
for ten years my brother was addicted and went thru hell
then he had become drug free
and a drug councilor he would be.
he had gotten many on methadone
and good results it had shown.

now as you go through the withdrawal pain
think of how much you have to gain
withdrawal is not an easy task
do you want your life back? you must ask!

do you recall the birth pains that you went thru
and his life was fresh and new.
wasn't all that pain worth your while
that you had such a beautiful child.

there is no pain that you can go thru
than the pains that a mother knew.
you have to be willing to make the change
otherwise your life will stay the same.

these words are from a concerned son
the choices you've made can be undone.

(1/30/13)

louis rams :
Phoenix Nov 2015
Small councilor
Purring with care
Tear soaked fur
And my small sniffles
In your ear
You're my small pillow
But you don't mind
Gental forehead kisses
Until my pain is at bay
You're my little councilor
My furry best friend
I don't know what I'd do without you
You're with me till the end
Michael Pick Nov 2013
'You should inspire yourself'
Said a councilor at one time
'Inside you will find what you need'
And clearly he said the right lines
Finding myself empty was harsh
And it woke me from my sleep
And instead you all filled me in
Your hopes are now my dreams

Because I don't live for myself
And I don't think that I will
I'm just not a worthy cause
And I won't bother to heal
'You should follow your heart'
But what does that even mean
I've written my future off
And your wish is my command

To say what you want me to
Or do what you'd ask of me
As long as I'm of some use
I permit you to use me
If you should deem me worthy
My servitude becomes a drug
My function is inspiration
Your master-ship shows love

I may be on hands and knees
But it's for the pursuit of heart
I simply follow your leadership
I state that it guides my soul
By now I find that I'm wrong
But I'm just too afraid
If I seek out a better purpose
Then your love is betrayed
Unlife Aug 2011
Two days ago, I'd broken the 10-year mark as principal of Howell Elementary. In 3,653 of those 3,654 days, Howell hadn't seen any fights like the one that broke out today. Before me, in my intimate and admittedly lavish office, sat Abel Marinero, age eight. There was a mahogany desk between us, and his eyes had recently sought refuge upon patches of its glossy surface; such curious brown eyes that would absorb the desk's reflection. There was a bruise on his right cheekbone, and his lip was a bit swollen. His hair, black as pitch, and his expression contemplative. Though he sat slouched, his hands were neatly folded between his legs. He was not panting, but had not caught his breath yet.
Only minutes ago, I was going over the planned layout for the new building to be built in 2012; dozens of fresh classrooms with newer equipment, into which I'd like to move our higher-tenure teachers. This was interrupted when Will, one of my administrators, came into the office to let me know that a fight had broken out - and that an ambulance had been called.
Since that moment, the boy was escorted to the clinic, where his knuckles were bandaged and his wounds - all of them minor - cleaned. Since he was well off, I had dropped everything to speak with him one-on-one after calling his parents.
"Why did you do it?"
"He took my Rafael."
The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle in question had been abandoned at the scene; likely confiscated by now for use as evidence. This was, after all, likely to result in a court case. I leaned forward with my elbows on the desk, fingers interlaced. I spoke into my hands:
"That's not a good reason to do what you did. You hurt Michael very badly." I paused in interest of his reply, which was, as expected, prompt:
"He hurt me first."
"He hurt you?"
"I told you. He took my Rafael."
I offered an exaggerated frown. "I understand, and that was very wrong of him. But the way you responded is not acceptable. You're in pretty big trouble, Abel."
He did not appear fazed by the utterance of his name, and his reply did not come. After a few seconds of silence, I continued.
"I want you to tell me exactly what happened on the playground today."
The boy drew a breath and began, finally granting me eye contact: "I was playing in the sand besides the swings with my Ninja Turtles, and I put Rafael over there-" he motioned to his right "-real quick. Then Michael walks up and takes it. I told him to give it back and he said I should share, 'cause he let me borrow a pencil in class. I said give it back, but he wouldn't."
Almost against my own desire, I freed my fingers to show a palm. I asked, "So you hit him?"
"Yeah."
I nodded and closed my eyes briefly. "That is absolutely unacceptable, Abel. Sharing is a good thing to do, and it's a valuable lesson to learn. Hurting people, for any reason, is something you should never do. You should have asked a grownup, or-"
"No!"
Between us, silence. Silence and a mahogany desk.
"No," he said, "because then he's gonna do it again. You keep saying stuff about lessons, but today, I was teacher."
I almost wanted to laugh, but after chewing on this response, I felt a wave of concern. If Abel was prone to violence, having him continue schooling here would be detrimental to everybody at Howell. And once the news gets involved, they're going to wonder why all I did was suspend him. Expulsion was feasible, but I'd ensure councilor visits as well. I felt compelled, however, to understand what had gone on - or was still going on - in this child's mind. So I asked.
"What did you teach Michael by doing that, Abel?"
"That sharing gets you hurt."

In 3,653 of my 3,654 days as principal, I hadn't been afraid of a student.
Alexander S Apr 2010
Friend,
You’ll be there in the end
You’ve been as patient as can be
You withstood my constant babbling
Bizarre comments and insane rambling
You’ve always been my councilor
On situations I haven’t seen before
You’ve turned me straight, helped me get the things I’m after
And turned my sorrow into laughter
You’ve helped me out, given me order
Been my critic and my supporter
You’ve helped my mentality when it’s on the mend
Friend
Christian Gentry Feb 2013
Living though this life
like a hermit in the wild
my angers, fears, and sorrowfulness rife,
yet my expression still smiles.

I scream out in agony
my emotional face defiled
my councilor in gallantry
is none yet myself's child.

As a dark dank chamber
beneath the great floor tiled.
While visitors unaware the danger,
think that I am so mild.

I style this my entire life
beneath the skin so wild
the hidden things remain so rife,
yet I force to show a smile.
L Jul 2013
i remember my friend laughing,
even in the worst situations,
which would usually cause the teachers,
to yell.

i think she did this,
to cover up her other emotions,
to drown them,
keep them silenced beneath a pillow.

she was loud and "obnoxious",
and she very much annoyed,
other students when,
they tried to work.

she sat next to me in math,
complained to me about everything,
i never thought to really listen,
but maybe i could've helped.

one day here,
the next day a cruel joke played on the class,
"the highschool councilor is here if anyone needs to talk",
"she took her life last night".

how'd she do it?,
"she hung herself in her closet",
this is a terrible sick joke,
"we're so sorry to have to tell you".

could i have helped?,
"this is none of your fault, kids",
but what if i had tried?,
"she was far beyond anyone's help".

she was only twelve,
"her thirteenth birthday would've been next month".
and for the first time in my life,
i prayed to a higher being for her safe travels into,
another kingdom.
Elizabeth Ann Feb 2013
He lived in a town where the children grew up up up

And like the population, the graves went down down down

He went to school where rumors were made up up up

So he always kept his head, his eyes down down down

His teachers told him to listen up up up

But after class they would put him down down down

The kids at school beat him up up up

They would trash his things and throw them down down down

The price of the drugs went up up up

The money in his pocket went down down down

His detention time went up up up

The councilor told him to stop being so down down down

His dad yelled at him to bring his grades up up up

And only beat him harder when they went down down down

One day he decided to give up up up

So he made the pills go down down down

The sun kept rising up up up

As his body was buried down down down

His father never looked up up up

As the children's tears fell down down down

He died in a town where he never grew up up up

And like the graves, the population went down down down
showyoulove Nov 2017
Finding Peace

My heart is restless Lord I am searching
For joy when I should be looking for
Peace. I should be asking more of you and saying less of me. I know you have me here right now and it’s where I’m supposed to be. I don’t know how to try and I feel like I’m doing this only as a last resort. I want joy, but it’s peace that I need. I find peace when I am here in adoration and the grace that I receive. It’s hard to let go of trying to find joy, because I love joy and you have given me a joyful heart. Remind me not to love joy more than I ought to love you. Let Your Will be done Lord in and through me. Allow me to speak love and life into all I encounter and may the work be fulfilling. Perhaps I already have the answer in front of me even now. I am at peace when I am with you. If I am with you, I will know peace and there is so much good I can do as a priest. Poetry and prayers, mentoring, connecting with all people especially our young people, being a councilor and confidant and all these things give me joy. Maybe being a priest isn’t where I want to be, but maybe being a priest is where I need to be for me, for you, and for others. Please Lord, help me to discern ever more this big decision and I pray that wherever I go and whatever I do, I may find or be led to a place of peace. Help me find joy in all the things I have peace with and may i never lose the joy and the childlike faith and love that you have given me. Amen.
Delton Peele Jan 2023
My councilor said ....
Just say no.
I said No!
She paused and said
Are you saying no to me ,
Or are you telling me no?
Cause I think you are saying no to me ....
Let's try this again ... K
Just     say      no.
I said NO! .... .
she said just say it
I said no!
Say it !!!!!!!!
No !
Ooooh you're a bad boy.....
Ma'am ? I saw  that you put the paper clock on the door that said I'll be back at 4.... It's almost lunch did you need me to go?
Yes it is    .... And NO!!!!!
YOU ARE NOT GOIN ANYWHERE !
Delton Peele Jan 2023
Ok ok OKAy.
Listen just say as little as possible,
Stop with the loquacious limericks and dithyrambs.
Leave a little wiggle room
Like a little riddle in
Few words .....
K ?
K!
..
....
Why is it that I become victim to the simplest things?
Like oh...... Idk ....
My councilor,
(Beautiful by the way)
Said
" You are too nice ,
Nice guys finish last !
So here's what we
Are gonna do.....
I'm gonna ask you
to do something inappropriate,
You are gonna say
"No".

I couldn't believe what she asked me , made me blush ..  .
And I said
OhhhhhhhKay.....  ..
She said ..........
Uhhhhhhhm       .... No no.
She started blushing too ..
She said no
You say no
I said "NO" !
SHE SAID ARE YOU SAYING NO  TO ME!? I SAID YES
SHE SAID OK ........

TURNED OUT SHE HAD A REJECTION THING ,
I HAD A HOT COUNCILOR...
THING.
One day I said ......
So is it really a bad thing that nice guys finish last ..

She said no
It's such a weird word ...
I mean world .
Oh no I said too much  ....
Aa Harvey May 2018
A no answer machine


Our basic instincts are to find love and run through the woods.
From the tree’s we climb down to walk like a man;
No longer on all fours.
Now we do not need to give thanks, for the food we have;
We deserve to be full.
All beautiful art fades eventually,
As we all become too dull.


No more to say…
I let it all just slide away.
Nothing will be relevant on the final day.
Keeping up with the Joneses;
Mobile phones are diseases;
Conversation is dead;
Only speak if it pleases.


Couple’s councilor; I could not manage to go.
So come or go, or let me go, if you think that I would care.
Love is not amazing anymore,
I would say it is just so, so.
Why would I bother speaking to you, when you are no longer there?


Phone on silent;
She is a no answer machine.
No reply necessary;
The end of the dream.


(C)2017 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
John Stevens Jul 2020
I had a councilor in high school that told me I was NOT college material. Rather shocked me. I graduated third in the class. So I set out to prove her wrong. Ended up with a BS degree in physics. There were times I thought about quitting when things got tough but her words kept me going. I was going to prove her wrong. Now I’m an old man sub teaching mostly high school the last three years and love it. Kids tell me their problems and together we find a solution. They know they can trust me. That is the way my life with others went all through my career. People would knock on my office door and ask to talk. Sure. They would close the door and unload their concerns. Most of the time they went away feeling much better. My last boss was one of them. God works in mysterious ways.
She’s standing there on the corner,
Waiting, watching, praying
That she will be safe for the night
That she will score her next job
That she will be treated with respect
That she will not be judged.

She’s standing there on the corner.
Waiting and wondering,
Why life is so cruel to her.
Why she was drawn this card in life.
Why she is here.

She’s standing on that corner.
Watching/observing
The people walking past her.
Thinking quietly of the situation she’s in.

As a car just pulls up
She wavers in her potential new client.
Reassuring them that it’s okay.
Making them feel at ease.
She wonders of/about places that she will go too.
And what may or may not happen.

She’s standing on that corner.
Praying silently.
Just in that corner
Away from civilization
Just on her own
Just keeping to herself

As you walk past and see her on that corner.
You may find yourself looking down on her.
You may think she’s a low life.
With no pride with no self esteem
With no respect
No goals and
no love for herself

How wrong are you/we to think of it this way.
She is a survivor.
She is stronger than you or I
She’s got street smarts.
And inner strength
Courage and bravery.

She’s making something of herself.
Slowly and eventually
Who are we to judge?
We haven’t heard of her/ their story.
We don’t know how she has ended up where she is.

She’s trying her best to make something of herself.
To pay her rent
To pay her bills
To put food in her mouth
Maybe even her kid’s mouth

She’s a woman/lady.
She’s a scared young girl.
She’s a mum.
She’s a cleaner/maid.
She’s a nurturer.
She’s a councilor.
She’s too- a person.

-Never judge a book by their/It’s cover,
Have you walked a mile in their shoes?
(You haven’t walked a mile in their shoes.’)

© By HF-Whisper -21/2/2023
11:24AM
Mateuš Conrad Feb 2022
title: hoop
body:
s'ah ah lah
habit: all?
ah...                                   as 502 bad gateway hacks go...


mein gott, she finally replied, it only took her days
to stomach my predicament,
like i predicted, on Wednesday she goes to see
a councilor... female issues...
former abusive relationships...
                   how is she going to wriggle out of her
current predicament?
she created this mess and as i asked her:
i hope you didn't find it malicious of me by simply
waiting to get the full picture...
i won't let her wriggle out so easily...
- so we're to never talk again, ever, ever again?
look at her now... changing her profile picture
almost every single day on WhatsApp...
make-up on, hair done all wavy, pretty...
very poignant yet almost dreamy eyes...
first it was always her with her son in the picture...
then just her.... then she with her dog...
then an old picture of her and a female friend
that committed suicide...
and now this one...
   i still think that this cold i've built up...
stuffy nose... harking up phlegm, sore throat...
is a love-sickness...
and those flowers i dropped round her house
with the card... i didn't buy them because i felt
i did anything wrong:
i can't remember the last time i bought a girl
flowers for Valentine's Day...
i don't feel like ******* i don't feel like
going to the brothel...
i had to wait until 12pm to leave the house
having done some clothes washing and putting them
on the washing-lines in the garden...
she replied... she replied... those ******* butterflies
again... go out after 12pm... buy the newspaper
and a bottle of cider... walk around the labyrinth
of English outer-suburban streets in the sunshine...
i still haven't read the message...
i'm gearing up to reading it with two shy whiskeys...
i need to drown these butterflies...
no... wait... i remember the last time i bought
a girl butterflies for Valentine's Day...
at least two occasions...
but one more poignant than the other...
Janina... high-school...
    when i was still a chubby kid... i remember
the ridicule quiet clearly...
then i lost all the weight and... the tables turned...
she made me ridiculous for having sketched her...
anyway... love like an artist... think like a kid...
i'm too old for this ****...
then again: i'm so happy that throughout
my 20s and 30s i haven't been in long relationships:
none at all... i still retain all that hormonal bollocking
you feel when attracted to someone...
look at me... aged 35 and i'm playing
a game of fantasy of love...
            nothing has soured in the purity of my
approach... the girls in my current work
environment just played each other...
i was being perfectly honest... i was the Pontius Pilate
of the situation... i washed my hands
clean of what they were doing to each other...
clearly a scene from a harem...
women are their their own worst enemy...
all the lads in the group were like:
when will this ******* drama end... we're tired
of hearing about it...
- and i have absolutely nothing poetic to add...
i'm just spewing language left right and centre -
there might a occur a breakthrough of brilliance
but i'm still nothing more than
a nervous wreck enthroned surrounded
by either a lake of acid of my stomach
or by lake of bile of my liver...
              now to drink just enough to sooth the nerves,
read her message... reply in the most cordial:
most charming of ways, to sooth this shy doe...
for heaven's sake she actually went to the hairdresser
to take a new profile picture for WhatsApp...
that councillor must have really convinced her
that i have some pretty good intentions...
i saw her only last Friday... making food for
her son in the kitchen... dancing, smiling, giggling,
singing... she looked like was was 16...
that must have left an indentation upon her that
she can't let go off... well... here's my snare...
my charm offensive has reached a second phase...
in the back of my mind: though...
she threw a knife at her ex...
   ooh... but it's just too exciting to give that sort
of woman a pass...
my madness will meet her madness head-on...
i'll probably start crying when i bring
a Vaughan Williams' vinyl to her house
and break into... "petulance": but i don't imply
childishly sulky or bad-tempered...
petulance: in this case is a misnomer...
i was thinking of penitent when i wrote down
petulant...
how will i ever get over her...
                      whirlwind of a red head... and it's
that sort of red that's...
well it's a mixture...
    dark walnut, red mahogany,
   special walnut... burgundy...
                          ha ha... last Friday... she even said:
you could sell this wine...
yeah... i could... but i put so much effort into making
it... i wouldn't want to...
she finished her third glass...
how that glass whirled in her hand...
she was spinning it round and round by its leg
like: no... she wasn't aware of her behaviour...
that's why i was there, to notice it...
i better make this reply a master-class in seduction...
remember... she's a coy doe...
increase the ****** tension... even try to friend-zone
her... but make sure you increase the ******
tension... she's going to be the one making
the first move... she will insufferable...
she needs to feel insufferable... let the cougar
pounce... next time you meet... insinuate a meeting
of hands... when parting do like you already did...
say goodbye to her twice...
actually kissing her cheek...
   keep that eye-contact till it feels like she's
burning...
ask her if she liked the flowers you dropped
off at Valentine's Day...
                                i don't care if she has a kid...
there are no other options exactly: made available...
but... i'm tired of all the cool-&-calm
objectivity *** with prostitutes...
i need to feel this... this is all, after all: primarily
for me...
not unless she "asks"... i will not cross the boundaries
to merely have: "fun"...
the more tension i create the better i'll feel
for having felt anything remotely akin to this
as a reminder of being hormonally charged as a teenager...
more tension... more... more... more...
now... to read her message...
    well: good luck to me... just minutes later she
changed her profile picture once more...
now she appears less serious... almost smiling...
play the ******* game Matt... play the game.
Amanda Shelton May 2019
Upon the breath of
the evening rose memories
of you and I.

I am here laying in bed
pondering on my memories
of you.

You helped me
to fight my fears,
to face the ghosts
that lurk in the closet
and under my childhood bed.

You were my hero,
best friend,
and councilor
but most importantly
you are my mom.

I will never forget
the times we had,
they are more precious than
the most expensive gemstone.

Your memory is priceless
worthy of evermore forget
me nots and a poem that
I thought would remind me
of the space I made just
for you in my poetic mind.

Such things are never forgotten
for your memory lives on
through the poems I have written.

Dear Mom, I miss you so much.

These are my tears
written in poetic format
in memory of my mom.

© 2019 By Amanda Shelton
Delton Peele Feb 2021
A tenement full of unintelligent
On the cusp of
Belligerent.
Random with anything in common is coincidentally dismissed .
This is a basic definition of .....what is
Named   ( the 12 )  The Jury.
Great ...!
Twelve people .....
12
People who it appears,
have seen a comfortable life which has held a consistently more pleasant theme than mine....... And it appears,
most have  enjoyed.....
a slightly better decision making process ,
And possibly had more of a chance to understand the difference between responding and reacting.....
Never the less I digress
And will say none of these people ....
Would look my way more than once........out of fear ......
They may  make eye contact
And I may consider this a challenge
Or opportunity....
And although my current seat is slightly higher   it's obvious they won't see me if not looking down.....
Because we walk on two different sides of the tracks.  
Knowing not one person not even one who knows me ......all they see is what they see of me....
Having no clue of my character.  
Only rumours offered up as facts
Not to mention are more occupied
With there own things .......
Some are just trying to hurry it up .....
Plus they weren't there.......
And really do you care?

WAIT.....!
Uhhh EHHHM......
Supper whispery
(((((((Tublecain))))))))......    
"Ok at this point my client requests a minute to confer with the reader ."
On what grounds ......?
"Excuse me your honor one second......
( Uh huh ummm. ***)
Your honor my client says .....
Two things
No 1
He wishes to express to the future reader what he's ......
(Sawwwalllow) ummm
What he is  ""feeling"" right now !."
And the second !??!
Iiiiiiiii uhhhm will telllllll you after hes finished?
I object you
OVERRULLED.
I WILL SAY THIS .........
THIS HAD BETTER BE GOOD
Councilor!
Yes sir
"MY client has convinced me .
It will be"
Ok son the floors your's.....
For a  minute.
Ok here we go.......
This really doesn't do justice
Yet I feel this analogy will leave you with sorta bland essence of .....
My current situation.....
So have you ever traversed a glacier?
And  stopped for a quick bite .....
And you spilled like three cans of sardines in your lap .......
Picked em up ate them anyway .
And quickly headed back on your way......far ahead you see what looks like polar bear ...
And thought well this was a nice hike .....think I'll head back to the truck.    Do da Doo don want to overdue it......and I'm feeling like
I need a good burn ....heck with walkin.    
Started to run and then between you and your truck. A pack of ........
OH FUUUUUUUUN!!  .
just then you fall down a crevasse
And when you wake
Wedged left to right.....in front a cave and behind the same .......
With one big difference....
In the front really very pretty wth all the light play and ice and everything...except for ....an Alpha male hungry wolf .....
With his pack pushing him so he's growling.
And since his muzzle is pressed tightly with a slight upward turn under your " decision maker"
You can really feel the meaning .....
:Translating:
Back off me , were gonna eat.
But this smell of fishiness and fear is just .....intoxicating  .........
STFup............and behind like I said the same except .......for ....... instead of the dawgs.    A polar bear pushing his nose in. My be.......
Since my pants ripped ......  
Feels like he is trying to smell the front side.............then one of them takes a lick ......
Ok so you've never experienced that ?
I find that a little odd but .....
Use. Your imagination...k.....
Let's just say that faintly ..
An epiphany starts to emerge
And then you say ....
I get it ..
Fight or flight .....
Huh! So that's what that means....
Well today right now I'm felling that
Only intensified......
.
Usually for me
Individual voices blend untill eventually become clamor.
This was the opposite .
And slowly feeling ....
as if....
with the temperature rising.
..blood vessels contracting ...

Skin tightening.....
Pupils dilating.  Heart racing...
Gravity and fear of physical harm
Dissipating.........along with every thought in the world save one
Escaping ... running naked wild And free........ scenarios with quantum variations in rapid succession .
As they each reach an undesirable end...
My  brilliant psyche calculating and piecing  plausible fragment from each one ......
They play through again
I'm beginning to see............
Oh F..k what!!      

I said answer the question or I'll hold you in contempt!
The attention
Turning towards me.
Thoughts racing ,distant
Catatonic glazed over gaze as I'm flipping files
My head snaps to exactly horizontal my lower jaw left behind is catching up at a snails pace ......
As I suddenly realize ....
I'm no longer 100 %
I don't "want to say anything till
to figure out what anyone could have known  of  something Ive done....
And profusely sweating  
And a forceful lucidity peaks like an acid bath
The whole room is looking at me....this is it..my eyes crossed for a second I felt really weak and queasy ..
The question hung like a frozen specter in front of me..
......
..
And just then
The viiiiicooodiin
Kicked iiiiyyiiinnmmmm
An Iiiiik aaaaaalmost
Sneezed......


Top of the world baby .
Looked at the courtroom and the balif
And said STFKUP!
And we all burst into laughter.
Lawyer said" 2nd thing "
"TUBLECAIN!"
Judge said
Tublecain?
WELL ILL. BE.    
A ......
SON!
your free from all charges .
Grabbed his hockey sticks and yelled
COURTS DISMISSED......
FIRST ROUND IS ON ME!
...
Hey you know what?
I agree with Matt Perry.!!!!!!!
He said it should be illegal to make a drug that makes you feel that good.
...

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