Rochelle R

Oct 2014

Nickols

There once was a girl named Suzzie.
I guess you could say Suzzie
was missing some vital screws in her younger years.

All day and all night, Suzzie would amuse to enthuse,
until the point of misuse.
Before finding herself reusing.
Relapsing into that old familiar abuse.

You could say, Suzzie wasn't content in her life.
Hell-bent on the decent into torment.
***... violence... drugs...
And to what extent...
Consenting to the need?
Proceeding to only concede?

The black bead...
The devilish ****.
A seed to heed warning too.

All day and all night, Suzzie would churn.
Yearning for her upturn,
for the point of no return.

Instead Suzzie turned her life around.
A full 360.
She learned, to earn.
Spurred by her yearning and churning,
of a childhood induced coma.

Kindness; rightness...
The mere brightness all from Suzzie's mindset.
A guidance from the righteous highness.

She's won her inner crisis at last!

"Bye, bye Black Tar, Suzzie!"

"Hello, the newer better you!"

#drugs #recovery

Oct 2014

Nickols

Missing space.

There's an ***** missing in my body.
Right between my heart and lungs.
An empty space filled in by bone and blood.

It should be there,
Instead,
it pains me that it's simply not.
A missing section of myself and my fellow humans, lost to evolution.

There's an ***** missing in our body.
An empty space between the heart and lungs.
A vital piece of something important,
That we've all mistakenly forgotten.

There's a piece missing.
The section between heart and lungs.
An ***** that can compute the pangs of lust and lack of oxygen,
when falling in love.

I blame my phone for the typos.

Oct 2014

Nickols

Apathy

You've done it, gone in the ways and mistook my apathy for empathy. When have I ever shown a range of emotion like the arch of a rainbow? Instead, blending into the background in shades of dark, dusty hues. My lackadaisical whims are nothing compared to the logic behinde string theory, or was it a theory based on my lack of range in emotions. I could be wrong but then again, I am an apathetic person.

So what do I know?

Rochelle R Oct 2014

The Conflict Between Love Lust And Love Lost

She is breaking.
There's a void in her tracks
and no light ahead.
The conflict between love lust and love lost
is waging it's war on her fleshy shores.
She can't seem to choose a side,
it all looks the same.
"It's a trap" she chokes.

She is freezing.
Her frigid heart is icing over
and her brain is going numb.
A vicious cycle of meandering
through brackish monotony -
looking for a map -
leads to where it all began.
Repeat.
"Nothing changes" she sighs.

She is vanishing.
Whispered honesties go unheard
amidst the cacophony of cross talk
and empty words.
Her absence goes unnoticed
as a silvery ghost of her
robotically relives her daily deeds.
"Anchored in reality" silently.

She is caving.
Breaking down like glass in a relentless tide,
Little pieces of her
are left to join the countless sand.
She's finding there's no escape
from this earthly purgatory
for the damaged and ******.
"There has to be more than this."

#love #war #sad #depression #lust #lost #escape #trapped #breaking #******

Rochelle R Jun 2014

On Honesty

It was early on when I knew
That my Jiminy Cricket
Was larger than yours,
Larger than you.
The guilt in me
has led every choice,
Or at least shadowed every decision,
I've ever made,
with-in memory.
A villain I've become,
For telling truths
that should have never
had to be done.
Admitting has become to me
Like breaking the rules of humanity.
Am I to be the only one,
Ignoring fears,
Owning all the words
Whispered through the tunnel of ears?
If that's the way it has to be,
I'll write again,
Expelling my inner voice
In the only way I can:

It seems to be
That honesty,
At least with me,
Is a flaw.
Faulty!
It shouldn't be...

#poetry #truth #fear #honesty #flaws #guilt #whispers #fault #vain #villain

Rochelle R Jun 2014

Absentee

Absent body, absent form.
Absent absolutely,
As if you were ne'er born.

Absent voice, absent deeds.
Absent frames,
Of histories ne'er seen.

Absent opinion, absent feeling.
Absent choice,
There's nothing left to be.

Absent, me.

On fathers, some fathers, but not my father.

#father #alone #failure #feeling #guilt #history #greed #absent #absentee