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Alaska Sep 2017
My soul is drowning with sorrow and
I can't seem to swim...
Alaska Sep 2017
Don't pick me flowers from a garden,
give me seeds to plant my own.
Alaska Sep 2017
You were actually
         the first one
     to completely ignore
how I felt and I
         guess that's why
     it hurts so much.
Alaska Sep 2017
It's okay to ask for help
       it is more than okay
you are not weak
       you are strong.
Alaska Apr 2017
My face consumed with  
                acne due to PCOS.
My chubby belly, even though
                I'm trying my best to lose.
My dry hands, that no matter
                how much lotion I put on
                                               won't stay soft.
My frizzy hair that I try
                   my best to tame.
My calves, that are too big to
                     fit into "normal" calf sized
                                                           ­  boots.
My heart that gets hurt time and time
                      again but puts itself back together
                                                        ­                 each time.
My mind that cares too much for the
                       ones who wouldn't do the same for me.
                              
                              ­ I'm trying to love  myself.
Alaska Apr 2017
I wanted to hear your voice so bad,
because even though it's been over
a year since I've heard it,
I've completely forgotten
it.
I can still picture the way you
smiled though....
I always loved your smile,
how wide you would grin,
the way your dimples
would peek through your cheeks,
I adored everything about
it.
And your laughter was a whole
other story...
I could always tell you
were truly happy when
you laughed,
it was so pure.
--
I'll keep the pieces I remember
locked in the catacombs of my
memory,
for I smile every time I come
across an old one;
tears do follow but only because
even though you're not on my
mind much,
I still miss you and the good memories,
so it's time to finally throw out
the bad ones.
Alaska Apr 2017
I actually missed you,
but yesterday broke
my streak.
I miss you.
I miss you and our friendship,
even though you had hurt me
yet again.
I still wished you the best,
hoping that you would find
your happiness...
but finding out that you're
not doing so well,
breaks my heart
because you're hurting.
Not only am I sad, but
hurt that you
didn't even want me as a
friend anymore.
I was there for you when you
let me be
and I could have been'
there for you now,
but you did not want me
in your life at all.
I guess maybe it was actually
my fault
for even letting myself
do anything with you
past our friendship.

I still hope you find what you're
looking for and that you become
everything you strive to be.
I never gave up on you,
you just gave up on me.
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