clmathew

clmathew Dec 2020

Peace: a poem about healing
written January 10th, 1995

peace
washing over me
gliding over me
breaking over me
playing over me

peace comes and washes over me
washing in sparkling clearness
carrying in fresh sustenance
taking back with it
terror fear pain sadness
leaving a smooth reach of my soul

peace comes and glides over me
a gentle front of sensation
moving across my body
bringing awareness and sensation
taking back with it
a dulling physical numbness
leaving a new reach of body

peace comes and breaks over me
a swirl of foam
gentle break of wave
momentarily hard angry strong
showing that soft gentle peaceful
doesn't have to mean weak victim passive

peace breaks over me
leaving a new reach of turbulent emotions
and gentle strength

peace comes and plays over me
stimulating my mind
tickling my body
moving my heart in new patterns
sometimes almost drowning me
other times just a trickle
but peace always plays over me
leaving a constantly revitalized reach of potential

this reach never forgets
doesn't forget the tides that came before
doesn't forget the patterns that were there before
but allows peace
to wash
glide
break
play
and see what new patterns will be made

This was the first poem I wrote. I was living in the state I grew up in, in college. I woke up one morning and it seemed like it was there in my mind, fully formed. It still stuns me. I wrote for a few years, and then stopped until recently. I am glad to be writing again.

A dictionary says that "Reach" can be a noun meaning an uninterrupted stretch of water. In middle school I fell in love with Ursula K. LeGuin, her short stories, and the Earthsea trilogy. It's more than a trilogy now, but then it was 3 fantasy books. In those books, one of the main empires is divided into sections, called Reaches. I'm sure that is where the word comes from in this poem.

#water #healing #peace

Dec 2020

Eman

To My Younger Self

I hope you’re still feeling peaceful
Some place where you’re safe
Separation is an illusion
You remain forever
                     tangled
                      in
      my
depths

A message to my inner child. Written (2016)

#inner #child #soul #adversity #adulthood #childhood #breathing #art #comfort #home

Dec 2020

Eman

Falling

-

I don’t think we fear falling
how can we fear falling
we fall all the time
apart
and
into place

-

Whether we’re falling in love or flat on our faces. It’s not the falling that scares us, it’s our fear of change, of the consequence, of what comes after.

#fear #change #falling #anxiety #time #lessons #love #sadness #truth #wisdom

clmathew Dec 2020

this tree - winter tree - witch tree

every season
of a tree
has a beauty all it's own

spring sprouts - blush of first love
summer lush greenery - the fullness of love
fall explosion of color - love burning itself out

but it is
this tree - winter tree - witch tree
that speaks to me most

your branches
spindly fingers
clearly reach
for your lover the sun

this tree - winter tree - witch tree

every cell
strains upward
wanting to be one
with the sun

this tree - winter tree - witch tree

raw skeleton exposed
loves first bloom long gone
longing for
your lover's touch

this tree - winter tree - witch tree

do you know
that your lover's skin
will set you both aflame
until her desire is quenched
and you are left
but ash and bone
do you care?

this tree - winter tree - witch tree

reaching ever upward
towards your love
wanting what you want
regardless the consequences

i try to walk each day. i often think about the trees and plants i see as i walk. today the trees, naked of their leaves, looked haunted and i couldn't get over how the branches reached for the sun. so much of the year we can't see that. the words "this tree - witch tree" kept going through my head as i walked. sometimes most of a poem will write itself as i walk, sometimes, just a phrase or idea, echoes in my mind.

#sun #spring #summer #fall #winter #love

clmathew Nov 2020

Lost in ancient forests

Ancient forests
started on October 9th, 2020
revised on November 30th, 2020

Translation of a Chinese poem by **** Wei:
"I know no good way
to live and I can't
stop getting lost in my
thoughts, my ancient forests."

I think getting lost
in ancient forests
sounds lovely.

I get lost in my head
in old familiar battlefields
and imagined future apocalypses.

But an ancient forest
with cool, shaded layers of trees
doesn't sound so bad

I guess it is the lost part
that is the problem.
Maybe the ancient forests
wouldn't be so bad
if the poet knew where he was.

Feet touching the earth
anchoring this self
to this exact spot
the soul a beacon
to the world's gps system.

I am here.

I am not lost.

I am.

**** Wei was a Chinese poet who lived from 699 to 759 during the Tang dynasty. This translation of the poem is from The Overstory, by Richard Powers, on page 41.

#lost #found #trees #ancient #forests